Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Boyfriends' Third Degree

Low cost life insurance. Great for home defense & other social situations.
Hey. Sometimes an ax handle just won't do.


                                                Boyfriends' Third Degree

                                                                  by

                                                                      Jay Agan

      Entrepreneur, military man, cold warrior, professional, movie buff. Insurance adjuster by profession (Shooting instructor/range officer on the weekend.) he set me straight on an urban legend. He was also a family man.

      Most fathers of girls have gone through the "man to man" with any new boyfriends the kids' brought home to meet the folks. Some have done the third degree in the living room or kitchen. Others (As he has.) conducted it in the basement/garage workshop.

      His was a little different. During the "procedure" he would show off only one of his "power tools".

      The Rossi "coach gun" (Of the type known as the "Lupera" or "Wolf Killer".) is an intimidating thing. Side by side 20" double barrel 12 guage with external hammers. While talking "with" the young suiter, he'd take it out & clean it ..... wether it needed it or not. With the heady scent of Hoppes #9 permeating the air, the conversation was paced by the in & out of the cleaning rod & would go something like this:

      "So ..... (swish, swish) ..... What's your name ..... (swish, swish)?

      "-------- -------"

      "Where'd you meet my daughter ..... (swish, swish) .....?

      "------- ------- ------- ...... (sweat, sweat)."

      "Where ..... (swish, swish) ..... are you taking her tonight ..... (swish, swish) .....?

      "------ ----- ----- (shiver, whine) ..... "

      "Who ..... (swish, swish) ..... are your parents ..... ?

      "----- ----- ----- ----- (shake, quake) ....."

      "What ..... (swish, swish) ..... do they do for a living .....?"

      "----- ----- ----- ----- ----- (snivel, whimper) -----"

      "You ..... (swish, swish) ..... working?"

      And so it went until .....

      "Have her ..... (Looking through the barrels.) ..... home by eleven."

      As they'd leave, he'd tell his little girl, "be good or be careful."

      Meaning, YOU'D BETTER BE GOOD!

      I understand some Italian fathers have a variation that goes something likes this:

      "I donna know wotta is a' you doin', but Iva  pretty good a' idea. Youse cuts it out! Capiche?"

      "Oh daddy!"

      The latest this fellows' daughter ever got home was 10:45.

      "Why are you driving so fast!? You almost ran a light!"

      "If I don't get you home in time, your dad's gonna SHOOT me!"

Article copyright © 11-29-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

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Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Godzilla/Gojira: I Hate That Creature

Japan is anything but third world. Still thought this was funny.

                                      Godzilla/Gojira: I Hate That Creature

                                                                  by

                                                                      Jay Agan

      Don't get me wrong. I actually love the movie itself. I have the Criterion restoration on pre-order & can't wait for late January to roll around.

      It's that big green bastard I despise.

      Yes, I know. He's supposed to be an allegory/symbol of the arms race, war, consequences of mans' tampering, etc. He later became an enduring figure in later films & the franchise has become quite an institution over the years. As I'm not a huge fan of most of these giant rubber monster flicks I only have the first two (Godzilla/Gojira, Godzilla Raids Again.) & this is how they "speak" to me.

      It's coming.

      Enormous, ponderous, invincible, inevitable.

      Intellectually, you know it's not after you personally. There's no way it could possibly have any knowledge of you & if it did it could probably care less. Mostly raw instinct, it has hardly any self awareness of its own let alone of you. Yet .....

      On a gut level, you know it's after YOU.

      Seeking to utterly destroy YOU.

      Not just to kill you, merely to end your life .....

      But to totally obliterate you. Without a trace.

      Make it as if you had never been.

      Why?

      No reason. It can. That's all.

      Maybe it's the scene where the mother comforts her child about seeing daddy soon as the creature advances. Perhaps the hospital sequences. Or maybe the young women singing the "prayer for peace" (These always choke me up.).

      All I know is I want that oversized crocklegator DEAD! The carcass could supply Japans' luggage needs for a century. I only wish Serizawas' oxygen destroyer to be a little slower acting & more excrutiating. Make that thing scream like a woman & go out like a girl.

      I can't wait for January.

Article copyright © 11-23-2011 Jay Agan

Addendum: Why can't they get NERV to do something about this problem? Mmmmmm ..... better not. Shinji's too wimpy. Asuka might want to date it. And Rei shares too much in common. Best leave it alone.

Oh yeah! Happy Thanksgiving y'all!

A couple of real Godzilla fans here & here.

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Doujin Work: Evil Never Looked So Clean



                                    Doujin Work: Evil Never Looked So Clean

                                                                  by

                                                                      Jay Agan

      Never before, have I seen, such a fun, happy, & CLEAN intro to depravity. Unlike Comic Party, & Comic Party Revolution, the viewer is actually told of what some manga/doujin sub genres are about: Porn/hentai. While the other two only hinted, Doujin Work out & out says it ..... without showing much of anything prurient. I must admit, that certainly takes some skill.

      It's the story of Najimi Osana, who finds out from her doujin artist/author friend Tsuyuri, there's money to be made in comic book porn. The running joke being she's a wide eyed "babe in the woods" making for some humorous situations as she immerses herself in the world of smut.

      What crosses the line for me is the relationship between Justice, another artist/author friend of Najimis', and his more than obviously underaged "companion" Sora Kitano. Though nothing is shown in the anime, it's plain that this is more than inappropriate. I understand the manga this show is derived from to be more explicit about it.

      Too bad. the anime is actually quite funny in places. I even liked that peppy closing number. Seeing as what this show is about, I can't recommend it. In spite of how CLEAN it is in regard to the subject matter, it's definitely not for the kiddies ..... or some adults for that matter.

Article copyright © 11-19-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Komm Susser Tod/Come Sweet Death, Complete Lyrics



Komm Susser Todd/Come Sweet Death

I know, I know I've let you down
I've been a fool to myself
I thought that I could
live for no one else
But now, through all the hurt and pain
Its time for me to respect
the ones you love
mean more than anything

So with sadness in my heart
I feel the best thing I could do
is end it all
and leave forever
what's done is done, it feels so bad
what once was happy now is sad
I'll never love again
my world is ending

I wish that I could turn back time
cos now the guilt is all mine
can't live without the trust from those you love
I know we can't forget the past
you can't forget love and pride
because of that its killin me inside

It all returns to nothing, it all comes                         Up up up aaaaaaaaaaah
tumbling down, tumbling down,                                tumbling down, tumbling down,
tumbling down                                                        tumbling down
it all returns to nothing, I just keep                           Up up up aaaaaaaaaaah
letting me down, letting me down,                            letting me down, letting me down,
letting me down                                                      letting me down

In my heart of hearts,
I know that I could never love again
I've lost everything
everything
everything that matters to me,
matters in this world

I wish that I could turn back time
cos now the guilt is all mine
cant live without the trust from those you love
I know we can't forget the past                               aaaaaaaaaaah
you can't forget love and pride                                aaaaaaaaaaah
because of that, its killin me inside                          aaaaaaaaaaah oooooooooooo

It all returns to nothing, it just keeps                       Up up up aaaaaaaaaaah
tumbling down, tumbling down,                               tumbling down, tumbling down,
tumbling down                                                       tumbling down
it all returns to nothing, I just keep                          Up up up aaaaaaaaaaah
letting me down, letting me down,                           letting me down, letting me down,
letting me down                                                     letting me down
(repeat)

                                                                            Up up up aaaaaaaaaaah
                                                                             tumbling down, tumbling down,
                                                                             tumbling down
                                                                            Up up up aaaaaaaaaaah
                                                                             letting me down, letting me down,
                                                                             letting me down
                                                                            (repeat)

     What a wonderful song of praise this would make with a few word changes/rearrangements. As it is, it's a "fun happy" call to suicide as heard in End of Evangelion. If you haven't seen this movie & you'd like your mind to be blown, then check this one out. To fully understand it though you'd have to see the 26 episode series that preceded it & that can be a drag. Evangelion Death & Rebirth may be a help, though inadequate. All the same ..... enjoy.

Album rendition here.

Dai Ji 3 SRW Alpha Version here.

End of Evangelion Third Impact segment. English sub here.

End of Evangelion Third Impact segment. English dub here.

End of Evangelion YouTube part 1 English here.

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

2012 & Third Impact: This Time For Sure!


Pull the shade, draw the curtains .....

                                  2012 & Third Impact: This Time For Sure!

                                                                 by

                                                                     Jay Agan

      October 21 has come & gone & it looks as if Harold Camping is wrong again (He has since retired & now says no one can know the time .....). No rapture. No armageddon. No world destruction.

      And for us Evangelion fans, no Third Impact! As for me, good!

      But wait! There is 2012. When the Mayan calender ends. Even though there are no indications that something would happen there has been much speculation about ..... THE END (Roll credits.). It's all bullcrap but then again what a better time for Third Impact to happen.


      So, when the ball drops on New Years' & "Guy Lombardo" strikes up the band (Yeah, I know, the end is actually supposed to be on 12-12-12. You can't be too careful though.), be on the lookout for any hovering, blue haired, Japanese albino schoolgirls in the vicinity. Do whatever you can to avoid physical contact. Fight, run, hide, whatever. Just don't let her get close enough to touch you. You may not like what will happen if you do. That's my advice to you, take it or leave it.

      So there .....

      OK, so much for that. I can only hope somebody takes this warning to heart. I can only do so much to .....

      Awww ..... Nooo! Not you ..... AGAIN?!. It's not even Thanksgiving let alone New Years'. Why are you always picking on ME?! We've been through this ..... how many times already? Twice. Yeah, two times before & both times I've rejected Instrumentality & came back. The last time what was left of me dribbled under the front door & I rematerialized outside my apartment. BUTT NEKKID! Have you any idea how embarrassing that is? (Good thing the door was unlocked.) Come to think of it I don't think you would .....

      Look ..... kid. I don't want Instrumentality. Really, I don't. I don't wanna be one with the greater "whatever". I don't care to be joined to the collective conciousness of the oversoul. I'm not into that communal thing. I'm also not into that fetishy schoolgirl look you seem to effect ..... & .....

      Never you mind what I'm into! That's not the point! The point is I don't wanna go! I like it here. I like being here. And I like me just the way I am. It may be lonely & "painful" but that's the way it is. I can take it.

      Now I know I can't outrun you, so I'm just gonna step right here in this here bath tub (Plug's in? Good!) & pretend you're not here. I figure if I reject Instrumentality beforehand, I won't have to go through the krap of "transcendance" again.

      Let's see now ..... I'm in my happy place ..... I'm in my happy place ..... my happy place ..... happy place ..... happy place ..... happy ..... happy ..... happy ..... Aw darn it! ..... BLOOOOOSH!

      burble ..... burble .....

      LCL ..... Crisp & clean ..... no caffiene. Never had it. Never will!

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

I Wanna Be A Protestant!




      The following is not about how I came to Christ. It's about an "incident" that pretty much got me to thinking of "getting out" of Catholicism at an early age.

      For info on salvation & certainty in eternity click here (Have a bible handy.). Skip over the first half as it's a satiric look at Harold Camping, Hal Lindsey & other date setters combined with material from the Neon Genesis Evangelion anime series.


                                             I Wanna Be A Protestant!

                                                               by

                                                                  Jay Agan

      Thanksgiving, 1967 & it's off to the grandparents in Elmira, NY. Alright! A solid week of TV shows/cartoons (This is how I really became cognizant of anime!) & scarey movies we couldn't catch in Ohio (Cable TV from New York City! For more on that click here & here.). One thing wrong. An aunt was getting married that week.

      Now what is it good Catholics have at a typical Catholic wedding? High Mass!

      Mass, or Catholic church services, entail a LOT tedious ritual including bell ringing, chanting, praying pre-set prayers aloud, "aerobics" (Kneel, sit, stand, beat your chest, sit, kneel, stand, genuflect, stand, kneel, sit, stand, kneel, cross yourself, sit, stand, kneel, etc.), and a long winded sermon all the kids & at least half  the adults didn't understand. Regular mass took at least more than an hour & high mass up to two. The spiritual effect on a thirteen year old? ZERO!

       This, coupled with a wedding, put most kids into a catatonic stupor. At least we got to unwind at the wedding reception.

Yes .... the resemblance is ..... uncanny.


       Next day, Thanksgiving. What do good Catholics do on Thanksgiving? Especially if they overslept from yesterdays' festivities thus missing the shorter services? High Mass!

       High Mass..... Twice ..... In as many days. Hhhhhhhnnnnnngh!

      A two day respite then Sunday. What do good Catholics do on Sunday? Especially if it took a while readying for the trip back home thus missing earlier services? High Mass ..... AGAIN!

      This was made doubly miserable by the fact we had an 8+ hour trip back to central Ohio plus a 90 minute + leg to military school for me.

      St. Aloysius Military Academy. Run by the Franciscan order of nuns. Though Vatican II was in effect, you couldn't tell if they knew it or not. V1 from before the word go. I was so looking forward to getting back there ..... NOT!

      It was soon after I resolved to become a Protestant. Whatever that was .....



                                      Article copyright © 11-8-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Friday, November 4, 2011

Ben-to: The KKK In Anime?

In my neck o' the woods I think there are more than eight "wearing" that.

                                           Ben-to: The KKK In Anime?

      Now I knew Japan had a small Nazi Party back in the 90s but I had no idea .....

      Was looking at a page at the O-new blog & about fell out of my chair when I saw this. Ben-To doesn't seem to be what I'd call my kind of anime. I'm sure KKK means something else in that show.

      Reminds me of a book I read long ago (Can't recall the title.) about the adventures of a spec-forces operative in Viet Nam. In one chapter an operation was being discussed & it was mentioned the KKK was going to be in on it.

      Newbie: "KKK? I thought this was Viet Nam, not Alabama!"

      Turns out it was the initials of a Khmere (Cambodian) paramilitary group running around in that area.

       Some things mean different things to other people.

Addendum: Oh, wait! Here's something interesting. Azumanga Power.

                   And something else. Azumanga March.

                   Hmmmm ..... I often wondered about those kids .....

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

20,000 Hits!

A demotivational combining the Azumanga Daioh "cast" & the Black Lagoon
art style. L-R foreground: Maya, Sakaki, Kagura, Aymu "Osaka" Kasuga,
Chiyo-chan Mihama, Mr. Tadakichi, Tomo Takino, Koyomi "Yomi" Mizuhara.
Back: Nyamo "Minamo" Kurasawa, Yukari Tanizaki. Further back: Kaorin,
Mr. Kimura, & "Chiyos' father"

                                                        20,000 Hits!
     
      This actually happened a couple thousand back. Just haven't gotten to "celebrating" til now.

      Really not much to say that hasn't been said at 10,000 hits. Of course, THANK YOU ONE & ALL! I mean it. I'm really flattered/gratified that so many from all over the world would take a gander at my simple (Simplistic?) little blog. Even if the majority are only here to "snatch" illustrations. Hopefully SOME of you are reading the articles that go with them.

      Which brings me to this: As a certain Azumanga Daioh picture & a couple anime style renditions of Charles Schulzs' Peanuts gang are popular (click here, & here.), I thought I'd post the ones you see here. Enjoy.


Again, some of the Peanuts gang as teens, anime style. Left: Sally Brown.
Top: Sally & Charlie Brown. Bottom: Sally Brown & Rerun van Pelt.

      Again ..... THANK YOU FOR "WATCHING".

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.