Friday, August 31, 2012

Are Otakus Weird? ... Depends

So the Goddess says, thus it is so ...

                                           Are Otakus Weird? ... Depends


                                                                      Jay Agan

     All depends on the "otaku". Me? I'm just a fan. To prove there's a difference:

Believe it or not, this pile actually IS someones' collection. I
don't have even a fifth this much. Most I wouldn't bother with.

1. Me: I only have about two shelves worth of these Japaneses cartoons. Yes, I call them cartoons. Sometimes I use the Walter Lantz spelling (Kartunes!).

    Otakus: Some of these folks have anime collections bigger than my entire vid collection.

"Man's gotta know his limitations.": Dirty Harry
Credit: Fighter4Luv from DeviantArt

2. Otakus: Some cosplay as characters who don't match their body types, age or gender. There should be a rule wherin one can only cosplay if one is within 10 pounds of the character they're portraying. Oh yes, get a shave!

    Me: I don't cosplay but if I did, I'd take my limitations into account. You wouldn't see me made up as Sailor Moon, Pinkie Pie, or whatever!

Even if I was into this, I wouldn't have a place to put them. That & I stopped
building/collecting models long ago (It was the darn glue!).

3. Otakus: A lot load themselves down with figurines, knick knacks (Paddywhacks!), posters, body pillows (What the ...!?), manga, books, magazines & other ephemera.

    Me: I've a couple posters, three reference books & a stack of manga less than a foot high. I don't bother with a magazine unless it has an article of interest. With all the free stuff/info on the net, why bother?

I have only one of these. Guess which one. Credit: Derek Lieu

4. Otakus: Into "anime flavor of the month". "The latest 'n greatest." Will watch anything anime, never mind if it's any good or not.

    Me: I have a few of the "classics" & am pretty much satisfied with that. If I'm streaming a show I don't like, I drop it. If  I pick up something & it turns out I don't like it, I either throw it out (If it's too objectionable.) or give it to the local colleges' anime club.

Oh? Uh ... What is it exactly? (Yeah, right!)

5. Otakus: SOME have, shall we say, interesting "predilections" to say the least.

Me: I'm not gonna tell ya! ... er ... uh ... I mean ... Never Mind! FORGET WHAT I SAID!

It Was the Darn Glue! here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Yeah, Todd Akin Is No Genius, But ...

Love him or hate him ... Missouri Republicans,
pro-lifers, & conservatives have no other choice.
On November 6 ... VOTE!

                                       Yeah, Todd Akin Is No Genious, But ...

     I guess I'm sticking my neck out on this one but I think it would be absolutely kool if Akin won over Claire McCaskill. Why, you ask?

1. It would send a message to those martini sipping, "country club" Republican non-leaders on how the "grass roots" is fed up with them. Or, for that matter, to the whole political "establishment".

2. It would teach the Democrats not to support an opponent for use as an unwitting "ringer" to ensure a win for them (Yeah, I know. The fool thinks it's because he has "crossover appeal".).

3. If he gained that Senate seat, he would be "his own man". Not all that beholden to the G.O.P. "intelligentsia" & certainly not to the Democrat party.

4. He's the ONLY hope for ousting Claire McCaskill. You "show me" Republicans, pro-lifers & conservatives had better "show up" November 6.

     Hold your noses TIGHTLY & hit the Akin lever.

     By the way. Yes, there is no such thing as "legitimate rape". However, could "legitimate murder" be a valid term for abortion?

     Just sayin'.

     By the way, the above views are my own & in NO way reflect the views & opinions of the Republican Party, the Romney/Ryan candidacy/campaign or any persons/entities affiliated with the G.O.P. I just think Akin would be the better choice as senator in spite of himself.

Todd Akin for U.S. Senate website here.

Washington Examiner article on Democrat "ringer" support for Todd Akin here.

Interesting "take" on Mr. Akins' qualifications as a medical man here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

Friday, August 24, 2012

Thoughts On the Evangelion Cast of Characters

Sadisma-chan & Penny Dreadful seem to be missing from this line up.
L to R: Shigeru Aoba, Makoto Hyuga, Maya Ibuki, Ryoji Kaji, Shinji Ikari,
Misato Katsuragi, Ritsuko Akagi, Gendo Ikari, Kozo Fuyutsuki

                                Thoughts On the Evangelion Cast of Characters


                                                                      Jay Agan

     The purpose of the following article is to inform/encourage any & all considering to view the various renditions of the Evangelion franchise to watch & enjoy. As questions & puzzlement may arise on the viewing of such, it is my hope that this article may clear up any confusion in regard to the subtlties of the shows in question & the personalities/motivations of the characters involved.

"Why me? ... Why me all the time?" : Eric von Zipper
1. Shinji Ikari - Probably the most irritating protagonist in anime (Or any!) history. Whiney, self absorbed, wimpy little git. Makes Holden Caulfield look like Schwarzenegger. Makes Woody Allen look like Woody Allen. Makes me look good. So tough he bites nails ... fingernails. Oh yes, he's also a little perv. He's THAT GUY in THAT SCENE  at the beginning of  End of Evangelion.

English voice actor: Elisha Cook Jr.

Would you buy a used car from this man?
2. Gendo Ikari (nee Rokobungi) - Shinjis' not so devoted father. Bad guy/manipulative mastermind of the franchise. When not getting into bar fights he seeks to engineer a worldwide, mass transcendance to his advantage & attain a godhood of sorts. Oh yeah, & get his wife back.

English voice actor: Raul Julia

"A boys' best friend is his mother.": Norman Bates
3. Yui Ikari - The oft mentioned but little seen wife of Gendo & mother of the whiner. So devoted to her son, she disappeared & became a "giant robot" (Really! No foolin'!)! Loving, caring, altruistic ... Clearly the most dangerous of the bunch.

English voice actress: Jackie Joseph

"I'm the emotional 'black hole' who's going to
suck the very life out of you ... count on it!"
4. Asuka Langley Soryu Shikinami Zeppelin Luger Messerschmitt Oleg Gramblepudding whatever of Ulm. - AKA: Asuka She Wolf of the SS. Half German, half Japanese, ALL AXIS! Was originally rejected for membership by the Gestapo AND the Kempetai due to her excessive mean streak so became an Eva pilot instead. Hobbies include cursing, goosestepping, kicking the whiner around & cursing. Hitler madchen with an attitude.

English voice actress: Roseanne Barr

"You gonna' git tanged!"
5. Rei Ayanami - Queen of emo. Second cousin to Yuki Nagato. A cross-clone of Yui Ikari & Lillith. Sugar coated harbinger of 'death'. The apocalyptic disaster at the end could have easily been avoided if she read lots & LOTS of Ayn Rand. As it is, she only read just enough to get it wrong. It was wonderful she was able to assert herself & be free of Gendo ... But did she have to do it THAT way?

Come 12-21-12 resistance will be futile. Like Aldo Cella, Rei KNOWS what YOU like!

English voice actress: Cher Bono Alman etc.

"Look deeply into mah eyes ... Y'all gittin' spacey ... spacey ..."
6. Aymu "Osaka" Kasuga - Has absolutely nothing to do with the Evangelion franchise. All I know is if she was "chosen" instead of Rei, everyones' preconceptions/plans for Third Impact would have gone RIGHT OUT THE WINDOW! For an interesting little "take" on this click here.

English voice actress: Donna Douglas (Elly May Clampett)

Who's the girl behind those Foster Brooks?
7. Mari Illustrious Makinami - Real name: Mary Marconi. That's right! Neither Japanese OR English, she's an Irish-Italian girl from Upper Saddle River, New Jersey. Highly intelligent with a touch of psycho. Failure to pass requisite psych testing for entry into law enforcement meant she was emminently qualified to become an Eva pilot. Not a total nutjob, she's known to wear a crash helmet from time to time while piloting an Eva unit ... which may explain a lot about the others.

English voice actress: Sarah Palin

"What!?  ... It's over? ... Well it's about time!"
7. Kozo Fuyutsuki - Former professor to Yui & Gendo Ikari, now Gendos' right hand/left brain man. Was going to spill the beans & expose SEELEs' plot to the world but Gendo convinced him otherwise. Just how DID Gendo convince him? Bribe him with a Yui clone?

English voice actor: James Woods

"Let's see ... If I eat the cats instead of buying food
this month, I'll be able to pay the rent ..."
8. Ritsuko Akagi - Mad computer scientist specialising in mad computer science. Brilliant beyond belief. However her superior intelligence didn't prevent her from being used, abused, manipulated & betrayed. She should have taken that offered position at Microsoft when she had the chance.

English voice actress: June Foray

"Oh? ... Really? ... He said that? ... Come here you wicked child!"
9. Naoko Akagi - Mother of Ritsuko Akagi. An even madder computer scientist specialising in ... uh ... yeah. Seemed to be part of the above mentioned manipulation/betrayal. Before entering the Computer Science/Artificial Intelligence field, she was one of the assistant developers of  Dr. Janet Lehmans' Total Transformation Child Behavior Program.

English voice actress: Joan Crawford

Every yaoi fangirls' dream. Excuse me ... I'm getting ill ...
10. Kaworu Nagisa - That boy ain't right! Kreepy! ... Kreeeeeeeeeepy! ... Oh ... so ... Kreepy ...! ... eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh ... No one at NERV seems to notice something's 'off' with that guy. You'd think the weird hair, albinism & the fact he's so much prettier than Rei would be dead give-aways.

English voice actor: Peter Lorre

"Hey ... Anybody seen my laptop?"
11. Maya Ibuki - A Kaorin (Azumanga Daioh) -like character harboring secret feelings toward her boss, though we don't find that out until End of Evangelion. Just like Kaorins' situation, the object of Mayas' affections is completely oblivious to it & is totally into cats ... & Gendo ... who happens to be a snake.

English voice actress: Mary Tyler Moore

12. Shigeru Aoba - Tough as nails, cool head under fire, a good man to have at your back ... Unless your position is being overrun by butt nekkid, blue haired, adolescent albinos. Then he just falls apart.

English voice actor: Al Pacino

She's comin' ta get ya, nerd boy!
13. Makoto Hyuga - Harbors feelings for his boss but is a little more open about it. It's a dream/nightmare come true for him in End of Evangelion.

English voice actor: Arnold Stang

"Hoboken!? ... OOOOOOOOO! ... I'm dyyyyyin!'"
14. Pen Pen - I do believe he's the one behind the scenes pulling the strings. He has to be the guy who even SEELE gets their marching orders from. Hides in plain sight. Wouldn't surprise me if he's the one who shot Kaji. The fowellest of the foul (Or is that the other way around?).

English voice actor: Mel Blanc

Smug, self satisfied, so full of himself ... Yeah ... I'd shoot him too ...
15. Ryoji Kaji - Misatos' on again/off again love interest. Triple agent (Maybe quintuple agent if you include the UN & Misato.) juggling various intrigues. Posseses certain info regarding various plots involving transcendance & Third Impact. Also has the low down on Roswell, who shot JFK, & the secret recipe to Coca Cola.

English voice actor: Jack Nicholson

"Yes. It's lonely at the top ... but you eat better."
16. Keel Lorenz - Incredibly ancient/intelligent manipulator of history since Biblical times & head of SEELE. It has been theorized that he might actually be Cain (Abels' brother.) himself. Has his hand on the handle & literally runs the world. Which makes one wonder ... How did a slimey little jerk like Gendo Ikari get so much past him?

English voice actor: "Brother" Theodore Gottlieb

The slogan at the center translates from the German to:
"Born For Fun, Loyal to None."
17. SEELE - While the Birch Society & others of the right wing have been chasing conspiracies, they completely overlooked this bunch. These are the illuminators of the Illuminati. The burgers & builders of the Bilderbergers. The foriegn relatives of the Council On Foriegn Relations. Since the beginning of time, they have shaped history & mankind into the cul-de-sac it's now in. In a desperate attempt to 'complete' what they think is a stagnate humanity, it is their hope of implementing an apocalyptic event culminating in a transcendence of all humanity into a single spirit entity. Scientology? Who needs it ...

English voice actors: Harry Ritz, Al Ritz, Jimmy Ritz, Moe Howard, Curly Howard, Shemp Howard, Stan Laurel, Oliver Hardy, Weatherly Hardy, Andy Hardy, Larry Fine.

My favorite Evangelion character. Unfortunately, she's a Sailor Moon fan.
"In the name of NERV ... I will punish you!"
18. Misato Katsuragi - My favorite character of the whole bunch. Strong, capable, more than competant. Always knows what's going on & what to do when the need arises ... Especially when she knows what's going on.

English voice actress: Demi Moore

     It is my fervent hope that this article has not only entertained but also informed & given profound insight into such a landmark anime franchise as Evangelion. In future I will attempt to review & inform one & all on other anime properties thus giving to afficionados of such, a richer appreciation of our great preoccupation that is the world of anime fandom. Thank you one & all.

Article (only) copyright © 8-24-2012 Jay Agan

Wikipedia Evangelion franchise article here.

Neon Genesis Evangelion: OOOOO! Goodies In The Mail here.

End of Evangelion: This Is (Really) Disturbing here.

Azumanga Daioh: Too Much Cute here.

Aardvarks' Plumbline blog here.

Aardvark Tees here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Disclaimer: The inclusion of the names of various actors/actresses are for the purposes of entertainment only. They were included as a lampoon of the Evangelion characters' personas & have not in any way actually done voice work for said characters. Please take this in the spirit humor/satire for which it was intended.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Interesting Search Words #20

Interesting Search Words #20

Yes! The 20th installment of a series guaranteed to get me more hits (Because I am getting hits.) on my not so humble blog. With 20+ more to go. And so ...

1. haruhi suzumiya gods can't die - Of course not. And keep in mind ...

It's all in her hands.

2. ayn rand is the devil - Only to Democrats & too many Republicans.

Yup! Pure dead bang evil ...

3. haruhi suzumiya no hips - Really? You sure about that?

Poor, skinny, anorexic, undernourished, wretched little thing ... Yeah! Right!

4. chastity hentai - There is such a thing?

Translation: I've seen enough hentai
to know where this is going.

5. haruhi suzumiya evil smile - Now how can THAT be? How about an all knowing smirk instead?

6. atlas shrugged & lord of the rings - Truely, we are trapped in Mordor.

Ever notice, when discussing (ie.: argueing) anything weighty with someone, they usually rely on: cliches, mantras, chants, out of context bible quotes, threats, ad hominem attacks & ... noise? Logic? Reason? Just what the heck are those? There are times I can't help but think I'm a minor protagonist in an Ayn Rand novel that never ends. I swear! If Jesus doesn't come soon, rapture or no rapture (Probably not!), I'd be willing to settle for an alien invasion! Or getting tanged ... whatever ...

7. bleach my little pony - Methinks this pony thing has gone far enough.

Perhaps even a bit on the creepy side.

8. women at work hentai - Uh ... just what kind of work are these women into?

9. sick shinji - Other than THAT SCENE in End of Evangelion, I would say he's more on the hapless & dumb side. Like someone else we know.

Hapless & dumb. Nothing ... but ... abuse.

And so ends this exciting "episode" of Interesting Search Words. Next installment's gonna take a while. Seems such search words from y'all are fewer & farther between. Til then ...

The Head Trip of Haruhi Suzumiya Pts. 1, 2, 3.

The Passion of Ayn Rand: Man, This Really Creeps Me Out! here.

Atlas Shrugged Part 1: Bad Because It's Good here.

Neon Genesis Evangelion: OOOOO! Goodies In the Mail! here.

End of Evangelion: This Is (Really) Disturbing here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

Friday, August 17, 2012

The Whisperer In Darkness: One NOT Worth Watching

Pass this one by.

                            The Whisperer In Darkness: One NOT Worth Watching


                                                                  Jay Agan

     Words cannot describe my disappointment on viewing this film. In light of the fact this film came from the same outfit that made Call of Cthulhu, I had such high hopes for this. Call of was 100% faithful to Mr. Lovecrafts' story, & though I knew there would be at least a little embellishment with Whisperer (The trailers seemed to indicate as much.) I was hoping it would adhere 90%. Perhaps ...

     I guess you could say 100% of the original story is there ... which makes up 66% of the film. Right after the protagonist realizes that things aren't as they seem, the film goes from Lovecraft to Lucas, ie. it turns into an Indiana Jones movie complete with a "temple of doom" scene! I should have known something was up when early in the film a character mentions the protagonists' lack of expertise in flying a plane. Yup, there's not only a chase on the ground but also a chase in the air as the hero & a little girl try to outfly the Mi-Go. The girl ends up falling to her death, body spinning to earth.  Guess they took the "kill off the little girl" cue from the The Walking Deads' first episode. Just came across as mean to me.

     You also get a "What the heck!?" conclusion as, when you think the Wilmarth character ended it all in a plane crash, he's now in a "dream state" describing how happy & wonderful it is to be under the Mi-Gos' sway. Yeah, I "spoiled" it for ya. Maybe I saved you some time. You'll thank me later.

Pretty much how I felt after watching.

     The best part of the film was when my dvd player encountered a smudge or something & the picture pixilated, skipped, hopped, & jumped for a minute. My copy came with a second disc of extras about the making of the film. I have not bothered to view it. It's enough that I know they ruined the story. I don't need or care to know how.

Copyright © 8-17-2012 Jay Agan

Call of Cthulhu: One Really Worth Watching here.

H. P. Lovecrafts' Dark Heritage here.

Howard Phillips Lovecraft Historical Society here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Casting Call, NOT QUITE!

Casting Call, NOT QUITE!

Was in the local hobby shop talking to the proprietor about my disatisfaction with The Whisperer In Darkness (To be addressed in a later blog post!) when he mentioned something that piqued my interest.

There was going to be a casting call at the very place in about less than an hour. A small horror film was in the making & they were looking for actors. As it was an open call & being a frustrated actor, I decided to attend. After a stop at a local fast food joint, I went back.

The call was already in session, & I was told he was already talking to a couple of rather attractive young ladies. Going to the back, I leaned in a corner & listened as the fellow explained some of the plot/storyline to the two.

Seems there was an incest/pregnancy subplot though nothing "overt" was to be shown. OK. He then said the film would involve a group of "religious" people who killed off dysfunctional families as what's "broken" stays "broken". That's when I left.

Even though I heard VERY little, I figured "religious" meant "Christian". Hollywood Christian. Meaning a bunch of violent low-grades spouting out of context verse & acting worse than the "heathen" they profess to be against. I may be wrong about what he meant by religious but I doubt it would be Kirk Cameron material.

Yes, I knew this was to be a "horror" film. I knew it would not be the kind you would show to your congregation. If it was to be a simple little fright flick (AND if I might be what they were looking for.) I wouldn't mind being in it.  But ... At the same time there's more than enough anti-Christian films out there giving a false impression of the Lord & believers. Of course many so-called followers & other Westboro Baptist types have been NO help at all in fostering such an image for others to pick up on.

What would Jesus do in regard to people broken by abuse of any kind? Including the abusers? I doubt he would advocate killing them. The fact the world in general & people in particlar are broken (Romans 5:12) is why he gave of himself, paying the penalty of the sinful state the world & individuals are in (Romans 6:23 & 5:8).

Hmmm ... why not a "horror" film based on John 8:3-11, wherin the "good" vigilanties are forced into examining themselves? Or a "political thriller" following the storyline of  2nd Samuel Chapts. 11 to 19: A Godly man in high position goes wrong, is forgiven, but must still pay the penalty(s) & unintended consequences. You get the idea. By the way, look up the above passages.

I guess I should be heartened by the fact that the technology to "bypass" Hollywood is more than in the reach of those of limited means. A shame so many feel the need to emulate Tinsletown. There's so much good material out there (A lot not even in the Bible.) that could be used to uplift/promote good.

How Do We Get to Heaven? here.

What Will Heaven Be Like? here.

God & Science web site here.

On the Rapture, Third Impact, Armageddon & All That here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Alien 9: You Get What You Pay For, Not!

                                    Alien 9: You Get What You Pay For, Not!


                                                                       Jay Agan

     I only knew of this very fleetingly in passing. From what I saw of the trailer it didn't look like the kind of anime I'd be interested in. Now having seen it I'm sure of it.

     Awhile back I saw one of those "what I saw, what I expected, what I got" three panel illustrations regarding Alien Nine. The last panel was of Neon Genesis Evangelion. That piqued my interest. I thought maybe the show had something to do with conspiracy & quasi theological/apocalyptic overtones thus making it a little deeper ... Wrong. The only similarity Alien Nine has to the Evangelion franchise is an even whinier protagonist. I didn't think it was possible to out-whine Shinji!

     While browsing through the Half Price Books on Lane Ave. in Columbus I fell across a copy. As the price was only 3.99+tax I thought I was getting a deal. Instead, I got dealt. Turns out four episodes is the entire series. It doesn't end, it just stops. Maybe J C Staff ran out of money or (From having viewed it.) they gave up in disgust.

     First, it makes no sense. Some 6th graders are chosen to fight/catch monsters/aliens that just happen to show up at the school. Some drop out of the sky in biologically engineered spaceships or in the case of Yellowknife, just drop out of the sky. Some, particularly the little critters, just happen to pop up every now & then. It later turns out that one of the "teachers" orders those over the net & turns them loose at the school for the kids to catch!

     The kids are "assisted" by the symbiotic "frog hats" (Borgs) that they wear. These hats have various defense "mechanisms" to help ward off/capture/kill the critters.

     Now the disgusting part. The show is partly softcore lolicon. Naked pre-teeners, anime or otherwise, are uncalled for. Two rather disgusting scenes have the "frog hats" tongues attatched to the kids backs while in the communal bath/sauna lapping up sweat. I found from a Wikipedia article the "frog hats" "live off their hosts wastes". If I had read that before I saw this disaster I would have assumed the aliens ate crap. As it is, the creator of this "franchise" possibly does.

     The Wikipedia article also goes on to say that because of its' rarity & low price, Alien Nine has become something of a cult classic. Cult? Of what? Creepy lolita fixated neckbeards?

     I can't believe this mess is from the same people who gave us the classic, Azumanga Daioh. Needless to say, I pitched this. At least I can use the DVD case for something better.

Copyright © 8-10-2012 Jay Agan

That Pedobear Meme here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Haruhi-ism: Orthodoxy IS Important!

All hail "She Who Must be Obeyed"!

                                      Haruhi-ism: Orthodoxy IS Important!


                                                                  Jay Agan

Haruhi-ism - The world should be made as interesting as possible, lest it be judged for destruction. Thus by the grace of Haruhi Suzumiya, one must choose to  liberate oneself from the sin of mediocrity & be saved from the hell of boredom. Always keep a curious eye out for mysteries & try to find the magic, the special, in every situation. And have fun, while helping others do this as well. Bunny outfits are traditional garb for priestesses. (From TV Tropes.)

     While researching/gathering material for Interesting Search Words #20 (Which may not be for a while.), I stumbled across the following search phrase that led someone to this blog:

     kyon is god

     Hmm. Obviously this person seems to be in grave theological error. While it has been speculated at length by learned theologians that Kyon may be more than he lets on (I myself wrote an extensive treatise on this subject.), it is still not certain what that may be. What we do know as absolute spiritual FACT, is that Haruhi is GOD(!). Anything else, well ... The theological ramifications would be absolutely devastating (Even now, as a firm committed believer, I still struggle over the FACT that the supreme being is (unknowingly) an ADHD afflicted teenager somewhere in Japan.).

     The actual hierarchy is shown in the illustration below:

It is crucial to know these things.

     Kyon cannot be the supreme being. He is a created being (Albeit a "chosen one" by the Goddess.) as shown in the illustration below:

"The Creation of Kyon" by Mickey "The Icepick" d'Angelo

     Hopefully this will clear any misconceptions harbored by the misguided & help expose any heretics working their vile wickedness from within the cult ... er... uh ... congregation.

The true believer ...

     In the name of the Goddess, you may now go in peace.

So it is written ... So shall it be ...

Disclaimer: The preceeding is a joke. It is not intended to pass off a bogus belief system (eg. Scientology) as legit. Please take this article in the spirit in which it is intended.

     Now if you'll excuse me, I must do HEAVY pennance:

     Pie Haruhi dominae ... dona eis requiem ... ... WHACK!

Copyright © 8-8-2012 Jay Agan

The Head Trip of Haruhi Suzumiya parts 1, 2, 3.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

DISCLAIMER: All images & quotes used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Friday, August 3, 2012

An Angel Beat(s) of Haruhi Suzumiya: Small Miracles Are Also Big

... Haruhi & I followed suit, leaving the clubroom early.

                   An Angel Beat(s) of Haruhi Suzumiya: Small Miracles Are Also Big


                                                                   C V Ford

     Though a long school day, I was in high spirits. An earlier math exam yielded a slightly better than average passing grade, something I (And my parents!) could live with. Haruhi as usual, finished way ahead of everyone else (Perfect score, darn it!) & promptly dropped off the planet. That didn't bother me as much as it usually did. Maybe I'm getting used to that soft, purring snore behind me in class.

     As the other three left on business of their own, Haruhi & I followed suit leaving the clubroom early. Walking her home, we (She!) decided to stop at Wolks' for a snack. Though unmentioned we BOTH knew WHO was going to foot the bill. Even this failed to phaze me. The weekend was tomorrow & the only homework for me was some light reading. Something even I could get out of the way in a few minutes ... in homeroom monday morning. And after dropping her off I still had the rest of Friday. Yesssss!

     I was part way through my drink when I was suddenly yanked out of my introspective reverie.

     "Oh God! ... Kyon! ... Just ... just look at ... that!"

Walking by, was a young man pushing an even younger girl in a wheelchair.

     I looked up, following her gaze over my left shoulder & out the window behind me. There, walking by, was a young man pushing an even younger girl in a wheelchair.

     "Don't we know him?" Haruhi asked with a puzzled look.

     "Only at a distance. I think that's ... uh .... yeah ... that's Hideki ... Hideki Hinata. He's an upperclassman on the schools' ball team. Taniguchi knows him a lot better than I do."

     "Yeah ... Who's the girl?"

     "I think her name is ... uh ... Yui. Don't know her last name. She doesn't go to school for obvious reasons. From what Taniguchi told me, they met during ball practice."

     "Oh ...?"

     "To hear Taniguchi tell it, someone hit a really long one off the grounds.* Smashed a window. Hinata was 'rock paper scissored' down into retrieving it. That's where he met her."

     "Met her? How ..."

     "It was her bedroom window-"

     "Wait! The ball didn't-"

     "No. She was like that long before. Car hit her. Left her quadriplegic. No feeling lower & very little above the waist."

     "That's beyond sad ... I ..."

     "Taniguchi also told me Hinata came to be infatuated with her & has been seeing her ever since. Helps her mother take care of her."

     "Oh ... That is ... so sweet ... it ... it ..."

     Haruhi slumped in her seat staring down at the tables' surface, sad look on her face. This did not bode well. Her emotionalism coupled with her (unknowing) God-like powers made for a bad combination. A nuke I & the rest of the world have been sitting on for some time.

     "Kyon?" She said pushing the bill toward me. "Why ... Why is there so much pain & suffering in the world? ..."

     I picked up the bill. My mind back & forth between the small irony & racking my memory for a quasi-theological/existential retort I could use to defuse an approaching, potentially bad situation.

    "I mean ... I see it ... TV, papers ... the net ... People all over getting hurt ... killed ... And over the dumbest things! I ... I ... just ... can't..."

     The alarm bells in my head started going off.

     "There has to be ... some ... way ... some ..."

     The thought of inadvertant world destruction by Haruhi had me up nights. The other thought of an unintended hell on earth through her good intentions ... well ... I didn't even want to contemplate!

      She sighed. "I know there're no such things as miracles, Kyon ... but ..."

      I started to relax until that "but".

      "Even if there are no miracles ... if there could be only one ...


      "I'd like for those two to have it."

If anyone needed a break it was those two.

      I again followed her gaze after the two receding figures. They were both laughing , talking. If anyone needed a break it was those two. Yui especially.

     From past experience around Haruhi, I KNEW there to be a possibility of  SOMETHING  happening. Something definiteley good this time. I mean ... One little miracle ... Could that upset the balance of the cosmos?

     It was about a month later I heard the news from Taniguchi. Seems Yui was slowly regaining feeling, both upper & lower body at an astonishing rate. The perplexed doctors mapped/charted a physical therapy regimen to get her atrophied muscles into shape. According to Taniguchi, Hinata was beside himself, planning to show her off when she was well enough to move on her own. Sooner than was usual for such cases.

     Of course I had no way of knowing that at the moment. All I knew was that there before me, across the table, was (When she wasn't self centeredly kicking me & the rest of the world around!) the most sweetest, caring young girl in & out of creation.

     Not thinking, in an involuntary, reflexive action, I smiled, reached across the table & softly put my hand on hers ... Completely forgetting she doesn't like being caught in tender moments ...

     She followed up with an involuntary reflex of her own.

     "What the! ... Kyon!"


     Hand went flying.

     "Just what the heck ... you think you're doing!?

     "And smiling too! I've seen you looking like that at me before with that stupid grin on your face! Don't think for one minute I don't know what's going on in that sick, filthy little mind of yours!"

     She sat back straight up, folded her arms, turned her head to the side looking down. Big hostile frown on her face.


     I still smiled. Letch. Yeah. Another story ... Another MIRACLE ... For another time.

Storyline copyright © 8-3-2012 Jay Agan

* See The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, episode 7 (broadcast order): The Boredom of Haruhi Suzumiya.

Disclaimer: The preceeding is a NON-PROFIT work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only. I make no claim to ownership of the copyrighted names/characters, places, some dialogue & events mentioned in this work. They are the sole properties of Kyoto Animation, Key Animation, Bandai Visual & Sentai Filmworks. ONLY the storyline is copyrighted. Please, by all means support the owners of such properties in the purchase & enjoyment of their products.

Angel Beats: Not a Haruhi Clone here.

Wikipedia review of Angel Beats here.

The Head Trip of Haruhi Suzumiya Pts 1, 2, 3

Wikipedia review of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya franchise here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Interesting Search Words #19

Interesting Search Words #19

Getting there! The almost twentieth installment of a series of articles that practically write themselves. It's all because of you, the weirdos ... er ... uh ... the readers who are led to this humble blog with the search words you enter on Google, etc. The hits just keep on comin'!

1. evangelion vs godzilla - Gainax & Toho! Yeah! I'd definitely see that un'.

Git im' Asuka! Just like her to attack before Rei & the whiner show up.
Credit: Metal Dragon Kiryu

2. haruhi suzumiya sit on kyon - Oooooh! You mean SIT on Kyon ... Yeah ... She does that too.

Kyon contemplates "pretty poison".

3. star worse - It's not that I hate the franchise.  Actually I don't. It's only that I got burned out on it early on. Saw the first in '77 sixteen times in the theater. The second seven times. After that, I lost interest.  Saw the third one several years later on cable & only a small part at that. If you like it, fine. Whatever floats yer boat.

"English m----------r! ... Do you speak it!?"
"I am fluent in over six million forms of communication &
can readily ---" ......................................... BANG!

3. evangelion as the three stooges - Soitny'!

Hikari Horaki looks on disaprovingly as Kensuke "Larry" Aida,
Toji "Moe" Suzuhara, & Shinji "Curly" Ikari cut up in class.

4. haruhi suzumiya is God - Well ... yes! Why do people feel the need to state the obvious?

I thought Lain Iwakura was the lessor god of the net ...

5. cthulhu burger - Well ... Now we know what's in that "pink slime" stuff.

6. rei ayanami mad - Would a slight frown do?

"Rapture" Rei Ayanami. Sugar coated death.
12-21-12: When you see this, you'll krap bricks!

7. mlp haruhi - Blasphemy! ... Sacrilege! ...

This is just ... so ... wrong ...

Well, there ya have it. Seez ya next time ...

Godzilla, Gamera, What the Heck do I Know!? here.

The End of Evangelion This Is (Really) Disturbing here.

Neon Genesis Evangelion Oooo! Goodies In the Mail! here.

The Head Trip of Haruhi Suzumiya Pts 1, 2, 3

Star Wars Star Worn Out here.

Call of Cthulhu: One Really Worth Watching here.

How ... How DARE He ...! The Offending of Haruhi Suzumiya (A non-critique of  My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic) here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee main page here.