Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Charlie Brown Summons Hell Girl

"Shhhh! Be vewy, vewy quiet ... I'm huntin' souls! Heh! Heh! Heh! Heh!"

                                        Charlie Brown Summons Hell Girl

      So I'm going through my blog stats traffic sources when I stumble on "charlie brown summons hell girl". That would definitely make for an interesting Hell Girl episode or Peanuts TV special. I can see it now:

      Tonight, on CBS. An all new Peanuts special. "It's Hell Link Charlie Brown!". Brought to you by Dolly Madison Cakes ... Makers of Razzies, Hickies & Boogaloos. And ... by your local Croaka Cola bottler.

Go ahead Chuck! Your "griefance" shall be avenged ...

      Boy, if anyone ever needed that straw doll it's ole' Chuck! That darn Lucy! Always giving poor Charlie a hard way to go. Putting him down in front of God n' everybody. Messing up the ball game. Giving lousey psychiatric advice (Whadaya expect for a nickle anyway?). Always calling him "blockhead". Taking away that football at the last moment.

If anybody deserves to go to perdition ... 

      If anybody deserves to go to perdition it's that rotten Lucy. Go ahead Chuck! Pull the string! ... But wait ...

      "OK ... I pull the string & she's outta my life forever. But when it's my time to go I go to Cleveland ... er ... 'the other place' too!? ... Good Grief!"

      SPOILER ALERT! : Wether Charlie sends Ms. van Pelt to heck or not is immaterial. Third Impact eventually hits & Rei glops him instead.

      "Aaauugh! ... It's the little red haired girl! ... She's heading this way! ... She wants to talk to me! ... What am I gonna' say? ... What do I do? ... What do I ... Huh? ... Her eyes match her hair! How could ... Awww rats!" SPLAT! ... burble ... burble ...

Go to Main Page here.

Friday, May 25, 2012

The Bonfire of George Zimmerman: I Think I've Seen This Before

A publicity photo for The Bonfire of the Vanities.
L-R: Tom Hanks, Melanie Griffith & Bruce Willis

                    The Bonfire of George Zimmerman: I Think I've Seen This Before

      If you haven't been spending time in an alternate universe of late, you may have heard SOMETHING of the George Zimmerman/Trayvon Martin bust up. Or at least seen something of the resultant media circus. As I watched it unfold I wondered, did Tom Wolfe choreograph this?

      Whatever, I do believe that as the facts come in about the fracas a lot of people about a year from now are going to have egg on their faces after the smoke clears from the trial. Provided of course Mr. Zimmerman isn't conned into a plea bargain.

      While we're all waiting on tinterhooks in the months ahead, I would like to suggest you take in a film I  previously reviewed on this humble blog: The Bonfire of the Vanities. In its' portrayal of media hype the film has a lot of similarities to the several weeks of "performance art" the public was recently subjected to.

      Warning: If your sentiments are on one side of what happened, you will find this movie amusing. If they're on the other, your blood may boil. Be that as it might, no matter where you stand, you will find The Bonfire of the Vanities interesting.

My review of The Bonfire of the Vanities here.

Wikipedia review of the film here.

Wikipedia review of the novel here.

Wikipedia bio of author Tom Wolfe here.

Definition from Wikipedia of the term: "bonfire of the vanities" here.

Go to Main Page here.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Kiddies These Days ...

                                                 Kiddies These Days ...

     Remember when one could discipline their kid in front of God & everybody & didn't have to worry about "intervention"? Y'know, some nosey hyena stepping in & threatening to report you for child abuse? After all, the child is only expressing himself & stopping him from his "performance art" would only serve to traumatize the little jerk. Well the little fool should get traumatized!

      I would love to hear/read about some clown getting punched out for stepping into something that's none of his/her concern. If the kid is "acting out", it's no business of mine to keep a parent from disciplining a future would be Jeffrey Dahmer.

      I've manned a cash register off & on over the years & I've seen some real kiddie meltdowns. I didn't think it was possible for a kid to have a stroke until I got into the "service industry"!

      I recollect an amusing little incident while working at a not to be mentioned would be Wal-Mart. A lady came through my checkout line with a rather unruly little monster. She grabbed "sweetums", draped him over her arm & used her free hand to give junior a swat on the posterior. She then remembered they were in a public place & gave me a fearful look thinking I would "report" her or something. I immediately gave her a thumbs up & a smile. The relieved expression on her face was more than evident.

      It's really sad one has to look over ones' shoulder when it comes to anything family related anymore. But then, it's been 1984 a long time now.

Go to Main Page here.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Interesting Search Words #16

                                         Interesting Search Words #16

      Wild, whacky, wonderful search words wheeling weirdos whistfully, wandering, willfully to this blog.

1. haruhi suzumiya is god - Yes. We know that. Did it need be stated? Is it being questioned? Is it being DOUBTED!? Are you unsure ... Oh ye of little faith!?

No truer words spoken ... yea verily ... so mote it be ... Vox Haruhi ... Vox Dei

2. evangelion human salvation project hentai - What!? Doing the nasty ... during Third Impact? But then, End of Evangelion is one big mind screw anyway.

3. anime isn't a hobby it's a way of life - Uh ... it's ... cartoons. Unless it's Haruhi of course. Then it's ... GOD!

Hmmm ... For this, much pennance is required ...

4. tee shirt with demented pikachu - Howzabout tee shirts by a demented Alabaman? Or is it Albanian? Alabama ... Alabania ... I ... I never could get those two right. Don't you make fun a' me!

5. rei ayanami house - DON'T GO THERE! Uh ... the place is a mess ... yeah, that's it! ... and ... and ... you'll be a mess ... burble ... burble ...

6. kyon & yuki nagato - So ... does this mean Kyons' last name is Nagato?

7. my little pony haruhi, haruhi suzumiya mlp, mlp haruhi, haruhi pony, etc. - There's been a lot of this lately. I mean ... what's the tie in!? How in the world can there be any connection? I don't get it. Can someone explain this to me? Bet the guy mentioned in #4 can ... maybe ...

The fear of Haruhi ... is the beginning of wisdom ...

8. hell girl words - English dub: "Oh pitiful shadow lost in the darkness, bringing pain & suffering to others ... Oh damned soul, wallowing in your sin ... Perhaps ... It is time to die ..."

                               Japanese dub according to subtitles: "Oh pitiful shadow lost in the darkness, demeaning & bringing harm to others ... A damned soul, wallowing in sin ... Care to give death a try?"

                               My interpretation: "Yer goin' t' heck n' gone! That or Cleveland!"

                               You: "No! ... No! ... Not that! ... Anything but that! ... I'd sooner go to Elkmont, Alabama! Aaaauuugh!"

We have nothing to fear but Hell Girl herself.

9. real anime girls - Um ... Not quite sure ... but ... I think it's called ANIME for a reason ... Just sayin' ...

10. azumanga daioh sakaki in boys uniform - GO RED RACCOON DOGS!

Tall is beutiful.

Azumanga Daioh: Too Much Cute here.

Go to Main Page here.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

Monday, May 14, 2012

An Exception In Guri: A Haibane Renmei Fanfiction

... looking neither to the right nor the left as he walked ...

                             An Exception In Guri: A Haibane Renmei Fanfiction


                                                                       C V Ford

      It is said Haibane are here only for a short time & then they're gone. No one knows how they leave though they do. Rumor has it some don't & if so, they live out their days isolated & forgotten in dreary, secluded existance. As far from people as the wall will allow. Forgotten ... never to be remembered.


      Even when he was in the town of Guri/Glie proper, the Washi/Communicator passed by only on occasion. He never stopped by but the baker always made it a point to show himself when the holy man walked past. The Baker cared little if the shaman ever entered his place of business even though he preferred the masked one didn't. It's not that the baker was afraid. Not only did he not have any reverence, he absolutely hated him.

      As the robed figure strode on, people would stop what they were doing. Some would stare in awe, others avert their eyes. Some ... even bow.

      Not so the baker. He always placed himself on the sidewalk at the door to his shop. Arms folded or hands/fists on hips, he'd look at the priest in calm, cold defiance & contempt. Not making a show of it, if anyone ever noticed, no one mentioned it to him or others after.

      The robed one went by, staff tapping the pavement in rythmic accompaniement to the soft tinkel of the bells of his ornate, green robe. Masked countenance looking neither to the right nor the left as he walked.

      The figure receding in the distance, the baker mused:

      "You ... thought ... YOU THOUGHT ... if I didn't conform to your beliefs ... didn't ... leave ... I would still go along with the rest of if? Live a miserable non-existance somewhere out of the way? Dwell ... in a hermitlike undeath, out of the minds of others?

      "You thought old man ... you thought wrong.

      "Every moment held under your sway, I hated. Your warnings of me paying for some sin or sins I have no recollection of went unheeded. I was actually proud of my black feathers ...

      "All the same, you have no idea the happiness I felt when they finally dropped off. When the halos' hold was weak enough, I ripped it from my head!

      "Just WHAT did you think? That I ... would continue to stay under your thumb? Sequester myself away from the sight & mind of all ... or become one of those mute freaks who serve you? No! I did none of that!

      "How it must gall you old man. How it must tear your guts knowing ... knowing ... not only did I not shut myself away in undeserved sorrow & guilt ... but lived ... And still living! I have a wife & family. A business even! I've made a life of my own & the things that go with it. Things you wouldn't allow any of  those poor children at Old Home or the Factory to have.

... a damn good worker & a cheerful one at that ...

      "And don't even think for one moment it's a quest for pennance or your non-existant forgiveness that I employ one of those unfortunate souls at my place of business. Nor is it out of my having been one of them so long ago. She's a damn good worker & a cheerful one at that!

      "Cheerful ... you wouldn't allow me that either ...

      "I've even set aside wages for her though she doesn't know it. Your not allowing one to better oneself ... Altruistic nonsense! No ... there's the off-chance she'll not take her day of flight & she could use a leg-up.

      "And I've two good, sturdy sons for her to choose from. Both have taken a liking to her. They know my past & bide their time as well.

      "Chance nothing ... I'll talk to her when the time is right. Even with my black feathers, I knew just how she felt when my day of flight neared ... Still do ...

      "Yes old man ... You thought wrong ..."

Copyright © 5-14-2012 Jay Agan


My other Haibane Renmei fanfiction:

Washi With the Mask Off here.

His Mother Was the Lightning His Taker the Light here.

You Devil You here.

Other Haibane Renmei articles.

Haibane Renmei: One Side of the Equation here.

Haibane Renmei: Awww Rats! here.

Go to Main Page here.

Disclaimer: The preceeding is a NON-PROFIT work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only. I make no claim to ownership of the copyrighted names/characters, places, & some events mentioned in this work. They are the sole properties of Radix & Funimation Entertainment. Please, by all means support the owners of such properties in the purchase & enjoyment of their products.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

Friday, May 11, 2012

The Vegans' Dement

                                                   The Vegans' Dement


                                                                     Jay Agan

      I tried veganism ..... once.

      Back in '81, at the behest of my Seventh Day Adventist landlady & after reading some Adventist propaganda (I usually read it for amusement.), I gave veganism a try. I left out all sources of animal protien. I don't think it was called veganism at the time. I thought I was doing vegetarianism (Which as it turns out, allows for dairy, eggs, etc.). While I must say I felt "better" up to a point, (Cuts, sores, etc. healed a lot faster.) the negatives really got to me.

      I now understand why cattle, sheep & other herd animals are constantly eating. NOTHING SATISFIES! Nuts, seeds, sprouts, fruits, veggies, breads, cereals ..... the feeling of being filled up lasted only minutes. I was ..... grazing! Like a dang cow.

      The meat substitutes from the Adventist store were no help at all. One can of chili gave me my first experience with food poisoning. Dang Loma Linda!

      And the constant gas & runs ..... ugh!

      It got to the point where I envied the two cats (Smokey & Velcro.) I had. I'd be dishing out their Little Friskies (Canned!) & the heady aroma would just ..... HIT ..... me. Those cats were eating better than I was! They'd engorge their carnivorous little selves then sleep it off. Their distended little bellies felt like they swallowed billiard balls.

      It got worse.

      Voices ..... & apparitions ..... of grotesque little creatures ..... calling to me ..... appearing ..... from out ot the wood work ..... saying .....

      "Meat! ..... Meeeeeeeat! ..... MEEEEEEEAT!!

      "It's what's for dinner!"

      "Real ..... food ..... for ..... real ..... peeeeepul!

      "CAT! ...... The other white meat!"

      After about two & a half months of this self inflicted misery & a particularly heavy session on the can, I'm sitting exhausted in my apartment feeling emptier than ever. Guts churning away with some of the most gosh awful noise imaginable ..... That was it ..... couldn't take anymore.

      Jumped in the car, hauled my sore posterier to Wendys'. TWO triple deckers, LARGE Coke, a Frosty, two LARGE fries (EXTRA GREASE!!) & back home. An epic battle with the cats ensued as I devoured the mess in nothing flat.

      Never looked back since ..... BURRRRRP!

      Cue Coplands' Hoedown.

Article copyright © 5-11-2012 Jay Agan

Go to Main Page here.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Presidential Dream Ticket: If Only!

                                       Presidential Dream Ticket: If Only!

For those of you who have read Atlas Shrugged you know what this is about. For those who don't, by all means read the book! You WILL be informed, you WILL be edjucated!

I don't think I could vote for this ticket. After all, a womans' place
is on the railroad.

      Oh for a REAL choice in November. As it is, hold your nose & hit the Romney button.


Atlas Shrugged Part 1: Bad Because It's Good here.

Wikipedia bio of Ayn Rand here.

Wikipedia description of Atlas Shrugged here.

Wikipedia description of The Fountainhead novel here.

Wikipedia description of The Fountainhead film here.

Proud Producers shirts 'n stuff here.

Printfections Galt Taggart mousepad here.

Ranting From Reno here.

The Atlas Society here.

A  VERY CAPITALISTIC tee shirt company here. I don't think he's an objectivist, but then ..... No one's perfect!

Go to Main Page here.

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Interesting Search Words #15

                                           Interesting Search Words #15

      Words of web wanderers who were woefully wending their weary way to this wonderous website. WOW!

1. anime bunny with guns - What's bettern' an anime bunny? An anime bunny with guns!

This couldn't be Kagame Hiiragi, could it? Konata must've finally gotten to her!

2. hentai real - Hentai UN-real. You probably wish it was ...... hopefully with some sub-genres left out.

3. yuki nagato is not amused - How can you tell? It's like determining wether or not Robert Mitchum is sleepy.

The best part of waking up is LCL ..... er ..... Folgers in your cup!

4. baby looney toons elmira - The show was called Tiny Toon Adventures. The character was Elmyra Duff. Elmira is my original home town.

5. cosplay lolicon - Call the cops!

6. big brown spider in virginia - Here's one in Arizona. Check out what happens to it here.
Attaboy Clint!

Yep! They git purty big out there.

7. the bible demotivational - Pen Jillette said he gave up at Leviticus. I would too. Start at Matthew instead of Genesis (And I DON'T mean Neon GENESIS Evangelion!).

8. haruhi mikuru asahina pillow - This brings to mind an issue of The Dirty Pair from the late 80s. In the letters section a fan kept referring to the characters as if they were real. The Ed. stated that real lovers, in spite of any physical shortcomings, were better than imaginary ones. Go out and ask one for a date! Yeah, some do "bite" & are mean, but that's the risk you take. The worst she can do is say "no" ..... & make a scene ..... laugh at you ..... put you down in front of God 'n everybody ..... make you feel like 2 cents ...... Ahem! ..... GO FOR IT!

9. manly guys doing manly things cosplay - As a manly guy I don't cosplay when I do manly things (Which is all the time.). Don't need to. God! I'm gorgeous!

10. rei smile - Long ago I had a spooky girl friend like that. She smiled ..... a lot!

Sometimes I think that kid ENJOYS glopping people!

Go to  Main Page here.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Gendo Ikari vs Chuck Norris: An Interesting "Search Word" Indeed

Propane, propane accessories ..... & LCL.

                   Gendo Ikari vs Chuck Norris: An Interesting "Search Word" Indeed

      While searching my blog stats for the next installment of  Interesting Search Words I came across the above. Gendo up against Big Chuck? No way! Keep in mind, ole Chuckles is so manly that when he does pushups, he doesn't push himself up, he pushes the earth down. Ikari wouldn't last two seconds with Mr. Norris.

Nobody messes with Chuck. Not even Gendo Ikari or SEELE.

      Lillith/Rei vs Chuck would be more of a real match up. Norris' A T field is at least just as powerful & his LCL has the consistency of concrete. He's the only guy who could out & out survive Third Impact.

      When I think about it, just who was it who "cut the throat" of the Lillith/Rei/Yui entity & releasing all those souls anyway? It couldn't have been wimpy boy in the powered down Unit 01. No, it had to have been Big Chuck himself. No one else could do it. NO ONE!

Oooooo! Bunnies! L-R foreground: Yuki Nagato, Mikiru Asahina, Haruhi Suzumiya.
Background: Itsuke Koizumi, Kyon. Credit: Kyoto Animation

      Of course I can't take any of this seriously including the Evangelion franchise. I mean, after all, everyone knows that the one true God is Haruhi Suzumiya. Third Impact would be impossible as she would just wish it away. Then again, with her yearning for wonderful, crazy things to happen, she'd just might let it! Even doing a "Third Impact" of her own! (Does what she did "three years ago" count?)

      Great! Just Great! All this time I've been worried about hovering, blue haired, albino school chicks when the real "menace" was a guitar playing whack goddess in a bunny suit! Sheesh!

      Wish she'd do something about those ponies .....

Wikipedia article on Chuck Norris "facts" here.

"Actual" Chuck Norris "facts" here.

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Ooooo! Goodies in the Mail! here.

End of Evangelion: This Is (Really) Disturbing here.

The Head Trip of Haruhi Suzumiya Pts  1  2  3.

Go to Main Page here.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.