Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Beyond Wrong & Wonderful: An End of Evangelion/Azumanga Daioh Crossover Fanfiction.

                                             Beyond Wrong & Wonderful

                        An End of Evangelion/Azumanga Daioh  Crossover Fanfiction.


                                                                     C V Ford
      Disclaimer: The following is a NON-PROFIT work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only. I make no claim to ownership of the names/characters, places, events mentioned in this work. They are the sole properties of their respective owners (Gainax, J. C. Staff, & Paramount Pictures Corporation.). Please, by all means support the owners of such properties in the purchase & enjoyment of their products.

U.S Dept. of Defense disc # 07734XXXXXX


Item: Post Third Impact survivor interviews. Transcripts/media courtesy Japanese Ministry of Defense.

Interview #39

Subject: Professor Chiyo Mihama P.H.D.

Born: --- --, 19--

Age: --

Edjucation History:       

-------------- Grammer School Tokyo, Japan 19-- to 20-- left age 10. Advanced five grades.

--------------- High School Tokyo, Japan 20-- to 20-- graduated age 13.

Pacific Institute of Technology, Los Angeles, Calif. United States 20--- to 20--- graduated age 20.

Major: Electrical Engineering/Computer Science

Minor: Astronomy. Recieved the 20-- Clayton Forrester Award of Advanced Achievment in Astronomical Studies.

GPA: 4.0 entire duration of enrollment.

Post graduate studies in residence at Lawrence Livermore Jet Propulsion Laboratory, Pasadena, Calif.: Various joint U.S./Japanese projects (CLASSIFIED).

Work History: Asst. Administrator, Tech/Research Dept., Mihama Tech Industries Ltd. --- --, 20-- to
--- -- 20--.

Administrator, Tech/Research Dept., Mihama Tech Industries Ltd., --- --, 20-- to --- --, 20--.

Liason between Mihama Tech Industries Ltd. & GEHIRN --- -- 20-- to --- -- 20-- Three months.

Administrator, Maintenance/Aquisitions/Communications/Analysis Dept. NERV (non-MAGI systems) --- --, 20-- to --- -- 20-- (3 I Day).

Now part of joint team MAGI Systems Research/Maintenance.

Interviewer: What was the general mood at NERV Central Dogma before the JSSDF moved on the facility?

Professor Mihama: Relief but tense.

I: Tense?

PM: Everyone was so relieved ..... glad. The "war" was over. No more "angels". The enemy was gone. At the same time we were going to be, as they say ..... out of a job. Rumors were coming from all directions about disbanding NERV, keeping parts of it going, incorporating it into the armed forces/government ..... things like that. We had no ..... idea ..... our own military would come after us.

I: Plans for the future?

PM: I intended to stay with NERV in whatever form it would take after. If totally broken up I was going to try to take as many people with me to my familys' company.

I: Mihama Tech Industries?

PM: Yes. Too much talent at NERV I didn't want to see wasted.

I: What was your position at NERV at the time?

PM: I was adminsitrative head of the Maintenance/Aquisitions/Communications/Analysis Dept.

I: Anything to do with the MAGI system?

PM: No. What we were involved with was organisation/maintenance of all non MAGI systems/communications. Office network, LAN, satellite, data, admin, payroll, book keeping, inventory & the like. I was there partly because much of the related technology was supplied/designed by my familys' company & affiliates.

I: Any interaction with Ritsuko Akagi?

PM: Mostly as was needed on a professional basis. While our support was useful to her, the MAGI systems were worlds apart in configuration, makeup & purpose. My department had no access.

I met with her not only as much as my duties allowed, but also socially, which wasn't that much. She was a heavy workaholic so it was only her very rare breaks, lunch & required social functions I could catch her at.

I: Try to pick her brains?

PM: Tried ..... & that's about it. She was usually tight lipped & even more so toward the end.

I: Any inkling of contact after Third Impact?

PM: None. Considering what everyone experienced & the trial she would probably face, I don't think we'll ever see her again. Just as well .....

I: As for what you ..... we ..... went through, we'll get to that shortly.

PM: All right.

I: Any interaction with Gen. (then major) Katsuragi?

PM: Then, about as much as with Dr. Akagi. Now ..... lots. Of course I can only speak in general terms about our present working relationship.

I: Of course.

PM: She was ..... is ..... a lot more outgoing than Akagi ever was. She has to be considering she's taken over Gendo Ikaris' position.

I: About Ikari .....

PM: That bastard can stay in that hell/nirvana he wanted to put everyone else in! Less said of him the better ..... If he ever came back I hope they ..... sorry.

I: It's all right. I know exactly how you feel .....

PM: (wry chuckle) Yeah ...... I guess you would ..... I ..... I had a taste of Heaven! The most wonderful yet saddest, messed up experience I ..... I .....

I: It's OK. We've all been through it.

PM: I'm never going to forget ..... ever.

I; What is your present position at NERV?

PM: I'm now part of the joint team managing/studying the MAGI supercomputers & related technologies. I'm not at liberty to say much, but give the devils their due, the Akagis were nothing short of brilliant beyond belief! ..... I've said too much already.

I: The Eva pilots?

PM: Saw them mostly at a distance. Passing in the halls, things like that. Shinjis' the only Ikari I have any sympathy for ..... that father of his. We're only just beginning to decrypt his journals. From what I gather,he ..... probably had less regard for his son as he did for humanity in general .....

I: We should .....

PM: It's ..... OK ..... OK. I'm fine ..... I DO feel sorry for Shinji. I recently recieved an invitation to his & Asukas' wedding. From what little I've seen of them I can't think of a more unlikely pair.

I: About Ayanami .....

PM: From the info gathered she was in a situation WAY beyond her control. As much as I felt sorry for her, I still get the chills when I think about her. She was, after all, the catalyst for Third Impact. Damn ..... Gendo .....

I: Let's talk about your experience.

PM: Ye ee ssss?

I: Describe.

PM: As in .....

I: Starting with the initial assault.

PM: I was in the main admin offices when the attack hit. We just couldn't believe it! Our own military attacking us! It was only much later after everything ..... EVERY ONE! .... came apart ..... then back together. Well ..... some of us anyway.

All we knew was ..... as the Americans say ..... "all hell broke loose". They had orders to kill every one of us ..... wether we were armed of not! I now understand why. They were as much pawns in that sick game as we were. But then ..... it was total betrayal!

My fellow countrymen gunning us down ..... like diseased animals ..... mass murder! Most of us didn't have weapons. We were scientists ..... academics ..... technicians ..... paper pushers ..... we .....

I: Your actual transcendance/instrumentality .....

PM: bullets were hitting everywhere, I grabbed a letter opener ..... crawled under a table. My thoughts were a confused jumble. I thought of what little I could do with a letter opener against a heavily armed man. I prayed for it to stop ..... go away. I wanted to curl up in a ball, shut my eyes tight & wish it gone. I was ..... so ..... damned ..... scared. It wasn't like an Eva unit fighting it out some distance away. It was right there about to kill me! Me ......

I prayed & prayed for it to stop. ..............................

I: And .....

PM: I don't know how long it lasted. Seemed minutes & hours at the same time. It was then that ..... it did stop.

I: Go on ......

PM: The shooting subsided momentarily. I thought the slaughter was ending .....& it did. But not the way I or anyone else wanted.

What happened next was ..... TOTAL ..... BIZARRE ..... WEIRDNESS!

Ever hear a MAN scream when he's scared? When he's really frightened of something? When it's something totally out of control & he can't comprehend what it is let alone cope with at all?

Sounds just like a woman. Maybe a slightly lower pitch but just like a womans' scream. No manly type of yell ..... but an unnatural keening wail ..... smashing your eardrums to jagged shards! A rending tear into the soul. That's what men sound like under absolute terror.

Other sounds too. Laughter(?). Cries ..... of delight! The kind you hear little children make at Christmas & birthday parties. Squeals ..... singing ..... hysterical babbling. Some shooting ..... some .....

I: Are you all right? Can I get you anything?

PM: No ..... no ..... It's OK! ..... This water's fine.

I: If you can't go on, we can stop & pick up on this later.

PM: It's all right (gulp) ..... I'm OK. Let's ..... finish this .....

I: Very well .....

PM: Other sounds. People shouting ..... screaming things ..... things like names of loved ones & stuff like ..... "You're not her!", "NO!", "But you're dead!", "It can't be!" ..... "Stay away!". "Oh my God!" ..... "I love you!" (?) ..... that kind of thing.

I chanced a peek from under the table ..... her .....

I: Her?

PM: The Ayanami girl.

I: Yes ..... the Ayanami girl.

PM: She ..... just stood there ..... with that impassive, expressionless look she always had about her. No regard for the chaos all around. Like she couldn't tell the difference from everyday or the hell we were in the middle of at that moment.

I motioned for her to get under the table with me. I turned to see if anyone else was close when I realized she had been standing a couple feet off the floor! Floating! ..... hovering! .....

I: Oh yes .....

PM: I turned back quickly & ..... there he was .....

I: There who was?

PM: Mr. Tadakichi!

I: Mr. ..... Tadakichi?

PM: He was a dog I had as a child. A Great Pyranees. Mom & Dad got him for me when I was six. He was a constant companion. Went with me to America when I attended Pacific Tech. Died a year after I graduated. I cried for months after ..... I'll always miss him .....

I: But it wasn't .....

PM: No ..... he wasn't. It wasn't him.

I: But you .....

PM: I wasn't thinking straight. Between being scared & all the confusion ..... I completely forgot myself. I was just so ..... glad ..... to see him! I knew he was dead but I just wanted to hold onto him & hang on ..... couldn't help myself.

So I grabbed ahold of him tight & close. So ..... happy. Not for the longest time had I ever been so happy! Fear ..... noise ..... confusion. Death all around ..... Didn't matter. I was just so glad to have him back ..... wasn't thinking ..... at all. .............................then .....

I: Yes?

PM: I felt disembodied, yet feeling everything. The rush of the wind around ..... through me. Traveling at incredible speed .... upward. Upward to a vast shperical black mass of energy. I & thousands ..... millions of others. Swarming in .... around ..... through this mass & into the hands holding it, of a form of a colossal humanoid female entity.

I: Go on .....

PM: Once entering this entity I was surrounded on all sides. above & below, by ..... vast multitudes of ..... people ..... floating ..... swirling about me. Incredible speeds attained as we all swarmed about one another.

Yet, in spite of the chaos & noise. MIllions of voices laughing, singing ..... of ..... release. Happiness beyond measure. In spite of it ..... it was peaceful. Restful at the same time.

I didn't feel it in just me but in everyone else. I was not only me ..... but .....everybody! I knew everyone ..... & everyone ..... knew me. Every name, detail, thought ..... emotion of everyone ..... all ..... at ..... once! At the very same time!

At that instant we were all one person. One ..... single ..... thinking ..... breathing ..... individual.

It was then everything changed around me & I saw ..... them .....

I: Who?

PM: Two friends ..... as they were from long ago ..... high school. Yomi Mizuhara & ..... Osaka!

A wonderfully strange kid. Looked at everything
from angles no one else thought possible .....

I: Osaka?

PM: We all called her that as that's where she's from. Her real name was Ayumu Kasuga. A wonderfully strange kid. Looked at everything from angles no one else thought possible. We all thought the world of her. I ..... still do ..... all of them.

We kept in touch after graduation. Yomi became a nurse & dietician while Osaka became a teacher & later an author of childrens' books. The others were .....

I: It seems a lot of care giving & artistic types never returned.

PM: Never ..... re .....turnnnn .....

That DAMN ..... Ikari! Turned the whole f-----g universe upside down ..... & ..... & dumped it out! Killed billions! If not killed ..... what!? Trying to unify humanity into a single entity? What the HELL ..... was ..... he ..... thinking!? Doing everybody a big favor? My God! Where the hell does someone like that get off doing what he did! Where does anyone get off with something like that!? What kind of sick demons were rattling around in that bent skull!? Next evolutionary step? What the hell does that mean!?

We thought we were defending humanity. SAVING THE WOOOORLD! Fighting the big bad aliens ..... keeping them from wiping us all out.

And all this time ..... it was nothing more than a sick little game between a bunch of super rich would be "saviors" & a twisted mind. With us, the "angels" , & every one else in the middle as expendable playing peices. Ikaris' son included. His own son! I ..... I .....

I never thought it possible ..... that there could be such a creature ..... as a ..... a ..... a homicidal humanitarian!

I: If you want, we can .....

PM: NO! ..... No! ..... I'm finishing this .....

I: Yes but .....

PM: BUT ..... NOTHING! ..... but ..... I ..... I ..... I'm sorry .....

I: No ..... don't be.

PM: But I am! I've never been sorrier since that day. I ..... will ..... NEVER ..... ever the same.

I: I doubt anyone will.

PM: I know there's a hell. I got hit with more than a look at Heaven, albeit a false one, so I KNOW there's a hell. As real as anything. And it's my dearest hope that Gendo Ikari, Ritsuko Akagi, Keele Lorenz ..... & the rest of that SEELE bunch BURN! What they did was beyond unforgivable!

I: Your friends, did they .....

PM: We were so happy to see one another. We were there ..... in high school ..... uniforms & all. I was 10 again! Walking the halls, my dog trotting with us. I expected Sakaki, Kagura, Tomo, & Kaorin to show up at any moment!

I: Other friends of yours?

PM: Yes ..... ones who came back ..... Thank God! On talking with them later, I learned they had similar experiences. Yomi & Osaka were trying to get us all back together! My guess is ..... one convinced the other ..... & they went looking for the rest of us.

I: So they .....

..... on either side of me ..... telling me how it could be like this forever .....

PM: They were on either side of me. Telling me how it could be like this forever. Reliving our good times when we were young & then some! It wouldn't have to end ..... just go on & on non-stop. Even getting around to stuff we didn't try 'cause we were having too much fun doing what we were doing already.

I wanted it ..... so much ..... but ......

Couldn't .....

I: Why?

PM: Didn't feel right. I wanted it ..... not right. It was ..... WAY ..... beyond wonderful ..... but ..... not right.

I: Right as in .....

PM: Total, flawless fun & happiness? With no effort or chance of unfulfillment? No possibility of failure, loss or price? No ..... challenge?

I remember our good times but we had struggles too. Our conflicts ..... bad times. Those were what made the good worth it. What good is doing your best when even your worst still makes you come off a winner?

I don't think I said it right .....

I: I think I get what you mean. So .....

PM: I had to leave. I had responsibilities. Even if in that dreamworld I was physically that little girl from long ago, mentally ..... I could "never go home again". I'm different now than what I was then or ten minutes ago.

Couldn't stay .....

..... really nothing there for me .....

I chose to come back.

I: How did you know how to return?

PM: I didn't KNOW how. I just knew I could do it & did. I know it's not an adequate explanation. As a scientist I have a responsibility to explain such seeming illogic but I can't.

I: So you returned .....

PM: Yomi, Osaka & even Mr. Tadakichi did what they could to dissuade me but I had to go. It broke my heart to leave ..... still does (choke!) ..... but there was no way I could stay. Since then there have been times I wished I did ..... God help me! At times, I want to go back! I'm scared if the opportunity ever came again I'd just might jump at it! ..... God forgive me .....

I tried telling them of the real Heaven & the real way to get there as I have in the past but they'd have none of it. I wished them well. Wherever they are ..... I hope they're ..... happy .....

I'll NEVER see them ..... again .....

I: About your return .....

PM: Next thing I know, I'm back under the table. Stark naked! Got my clothes on fast as I could but still stayed hidden til .... for hours it seemed.

There was still some shooting. Most of the combatants were either traumatized to incapacity or just in no mood to fight. A good number of our own security unit rallied. Many of our former attackers took off. Several military units not under SEELE influence were based near Tokyo 3 & not involved in the initial fighting. They managed to pull themselves together & impose a cease fire in the area.

People who died in the initial assault came back without even a scratch. Others who went unhurt were never seen again. The first shall be last ..... the last shall be first .....

For a while it was pandaemonium & chaos the world over. It was almost a week before regular communications was restored. As soon as I could, I tried to get in touch with everyone I knew. Except for a few, I found most still with us ..... Yomi & Osaka weren't among them .....

I first contacted a friend in the Nat. Fed. Police, Tomo Takino. She was way ahead of me. She had already pulled some strings & had investigations going on top of the inevitable flood of missing persons cases.

I: The Tomo you mentioned before?

PM: Yes. She entered the academy while still in college. She's now a liason between the police & ICPO (Interpol).

I hoped it was only a bad dream somehow & they'd still be found. There hasn't been a trace ..... Tomo's still searching. She & Yomi were close ..... & Osaka ..... those two ..... Oh dear God! .....

I: Real Heaven & the real way ..... It says in your dossier you're a convert to Christianity.

PM: Yes. I accepted Jesus Christ as ruler of my life my second year at Pacific Tech ..... he ..... he's now also the keeper of my sanity. I ..... I ..... I know I haven't been giving a good behavioral example of what a Christian should be in this interview.

I: Quite understandable. Third Impacts' taken a HUGE toll on most. We've seen clergymen break down & vent in some interviews like you wouldn't believe. Swearing like sailors! Not to mention the devout in other religions & belief systems.

You're not alone.

PM: Not ..... alone ..... Osaka? ..... Yomi? ..... OH MY GOD! ..... Oh ..... sweet ..... Jesus! .....
nooooooo .....

Copyright © 1-11-2012 Jay Agan

      Hope you enjoyed my little fanfic.

      I left some dates blank in the "dossier" section as to leave room for "expansion" when the Evangelion "rebuild" movies are concluded.

      "Pacific Tech" is a fictional university depicted in George Pals' classic movie War of the Worlds (Paramount Pictures 1953). "Clayton Forrester" (Played by Gene Barry) is the films' main protagonist.

End of Evangelion: This Is (Really) Disturbing here.

Neon Genesis Evangelion: OOOOO! Goodies In The Mail! here.

On the Rapture, Third Impact, Armageddon & All That here.

Azumanga Daioh: Too ..... Much ..... Cute here.

Go to Main Page here

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  1. Wow.

    I repent in dust and ashes of anything I have ever said about fanfic.

    Well and powerfully played. Tears, man. Tears.

    One slight "encouragement": spell checker. Yes. I am the Grammar Police!

  2. I see that you got the PictureMoTron thingie to work.

  3. I went to bed & when I got up ..... it was working again! Went back in & added what was originally planned. Also found some spelling mistakes.