Rapture Bunnies 'r Fun!

Bunnies, lemmings, woodchucks, whatever. C'mon people! Think!

                                                Rapture Bunnies 'r Fun!

                                                                by

                                                                    Jay Agan

      Now many of you may think since May 21 has come & gone, the Harold Camping fiasco is all over with. Not quite. If you recall, his original prediction was for the rapture to happen on that date followed by five months of literal hell on earth with total annihilation October 21st.

      Before having a stroke in June, he revised it saying both the rapture & total destruction would take place on 10-21-11. Really now. How silly can you get? Good question & I have an "answer".

      I was for some time wrapped up in the fundy doomsday mentality. Salvation stopped being central & a preoccupation with THE END (Roll the credits!) took over. While an interest in Biblical prophecy can be fascinating, it can lead to obsession if one is not careful. If you leave your ability of critical thinking behind, taking your focus off Christs' payment in your place, you can end up fearful & off balance.

      There's a little game rapture believers like to play. It's the "What Info Will I Leave Behind For Those LEFT BEHIND © So They Can Endure The Tribulation Game."

       I've seen it played more than once (A great place for all sorts of end times hijinks is the Raptureready web site. Take a look. They're a hoot!). This is where you make up a list of materials/info, gather 'em up, cache it & leave an envelope "addressed" to your unsaved loved ones labeled : "To be opened in the event of my disappearance/rapture." In it are instructions of where the info is at, how to read it, get saved, & resist the "anti-Christ". I even participated once while in divinity school (A failed experience. Not being a "people person" I was not cut out to be a minister. I've little patience with weaklings blaming Satan for all their troubles.)

      There we were in class. Everyone coming up with all sorts of titles, papers, tapes on how to endure the coming tribulation. All bright eyed, beaming on how they were going to see that their kith & kin were to be secure after they were gone. Yes sir, no one was going to accuse them of  not helping out.

      As the class discussed this, I couldn't help noticing the absolute DEARTH of anything of  practical physical survival value. You know, food supplies, gear, skills, etc. While spiritual fortification is of utmost importance, there is no sense in being starving & defensless.

      As they went full bore speculating on how their friends & relatives would weather the coming hell on earth, I committed what, to them could be charitably referred to as "the mother of all faux pas".

      "What you have for them infowise is all well & good but ..... ," looking about the room, "..... don't you think they might find a .38 & a box of ammo to be useful too?"

      Not meaning to take the Lords' name in vain but ..... OH ..... MY ..... GOD!

      You would have thought I commited some UNSPEAKABLE blaspemey! Oh the howling! ..... the wailing! ..... THE GNASHING OF TEETH! How dare I even suggest the possibility of the use of violence to survive! Didn't I know of the futility of resistance in the face of ultimate evil? Wasn't relying on your ability & resources an expression of a lack of faith in God? Needless to say there were also a lot of ad homonym "remarks" toward me & what a negative type I was.

      So heavenly minded & no earthly good.

      For my amusement, I actually read the Left Behind series of books. The attraction for me was, as I intially leafed through the pages, I noticed the protagonists would put up a fight of some kind. Even shooting back! This was quite a departure from end times stories in the past wherein the "good guys" would wait passively to get joyously martyred. This bunch would throw down when they had to. I liked that. There wasn't much else to like. Tim LaHayes' ramblings through misread scripture, angels doing all but co-piloting planes, badly done dystopian sci-fi ..... topped off with a very disappointing depiction of Jesus as a "mechanistic" entity spouting King James-like prose. Made me want to root for Carpathia!

      As an aside, it was during my studies at this school the Carter/Ford presidential election took place. The students seemingly voted en-masse for Carter. I took a lot of crap from them over my choice, Lester Maddox (I used to vote third party up til Bush/Dukakis.). They thought it was quite funny & pathetic & boy, did they ever let me know it! I told them they would regret their vote later. They laughed & said Carter was "one of us". Over a year later, they finally figured Carter was "one of those". In the words of Herb Philbrick: "A born again turkey is still a turkey."

Article copyright © 9-29-2011 Jay Agan

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Initial Thoughts On Initial D



Artists' rendition of Initial-Ds' protagonist, Takumi Fujiwara &
 his "panda" Toyota Sprinter Trueno GT Apex AE86 or "Eight Six".

                                   
                                          Initial Thoughts On Initial-D

                                                                by

                                                                    Jay Agan

      When I picked up a copy of the first disc of Initial-D at Half Price Books I was initially enthused. After a few more discs, I gave them to the local colleges' anime club. Not that I don't like Initial-D, I just don't love it.

      Takumi Fujiwara is an indifferent "racer" as he delivers tofu for his dads' business to customers on Mt. Akina. It's no big deal to him as he only follows his fathers orders & in so doing, unknowingly becomes the "Ghost of Mt. Akina" in his impromptu races with other drivers on the treacherous bends & turns of the mountain. In the five years he's been delivering for his dad (Without a drivers license!) he's become a superb driver with skills to match anyone. As the story progresses he makes himself known & his enthusiasm for illegal street "drift" racing grows.

      In my formative years, when I wasn't digesting horror/sci-fi, etc., I was reading any & every about cars. While stuck in military school, I latched on to Henry Gregor Felsen s' books (Hot Rod, Street Rod, Boy Gets Car, Crash Club.). Speed Racer  (Mach Go Go Go!) also fired the imagination.

      A few years back I became aware (Through the now Bigfoot 'n Bullcrap er ..... uh History Channel about the present day drag racing scene wherein a lot of Japanese cars are used. As I had lost interest since the "muscle car" era of the 70s, this was something new to me. The Fast & Furious franchise (Not to be confused with the present BATF royal screw up.) later made me aware of  "drift" racing.

      I thought Initial-D to be a Felsen-like experience & for the first few eps it was ("Boy gets car", has an enthusiastic buddy or two, gets a girlfriend, etc.). After that it turned into "opponent of the week" with lots of racing around looking grim. That's when I lost interest. At least Speed Racer had a variety of stories (Albeit "kiddy" stuff.). I understand later "stages" (seasons) to be a bit different.

      As it is, I got as much out of it as I did the parody in ep 6 of Lucky Star.

Article copyright © 9-28-2011 Jay Agan

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Queen Of Blood/Queen Of Schlock

Wish the cover art for the copy I have was this kool. Love the rocket!

                      
                                      Queen Of Blood/Queen Of Schlock

                                                                by

                                                                   Jay Agan
     
      Take ..... a smaller studio specializing in low budget coolness (American International), an aging but still well known actor (Basil "Sherlock Holmes" Rathbone), some relative unknowns to be "names" later (John Saxon, Dennis Hopper), the editor (Forrest J Ackerman) of every kids' favorite monster movie magazine (Famous Monsters of Filmland) in a semiprominent non-speaking role, SPFX & mood shots/clips from 2+ east European sci-fi films. Cobble this mess together & whaddayagot? A Roger Corman flick called Queen of Blood!

     The technocratic govt. of future Earth (1990!) recieves a message from a distant world: They're willing to share their advancements & an ambassador is on the way (Oh, goody!). The alien ship crashlands on Mars & scientist Rathbone gets a rush program going for a rescue mission.

      One of the rescue crews only finds a dead occupant, while the backup on Phobos inadvertantly runs across the ambassador (Florence Marley). Transferring her to the main ship (And leaving an astronaut behind.) the expedition heads back to Earth.

      The green being turns out to have an appetite for human blood (She chews out the wrist.). Through her powers of mesmerism, two of the crew (Dennis Hopper, Robert Boon) buy the farm. It's almost curtains for John Saxon, but is saved by the intervention of Judi Meredith.

      In the ensuing quick struggle, the alien is merely scratched & bleeds to death. Seems she may been some kind of overly inbred "royalty" thus hemophiliac.

      On arrival to Earth, it's found the ship is "infested" with "eggs". Turns out the "ambassador" was actually an "advance guard" to colonize our planet for her vampiric kind. A still ecstatic Rathbone & science team gather the eggs for study. The film ends with a smiling Forrest Ackerman looking down at a tray of pulsating ova he's holding.

"Uncle Forry" (Forrest J Ackerman) looking quite pleased with himself as
he examines a tray of alien eggs at the end of Queen of Blood. Credit: AIP

     
      Queen of Blood/Planet of Blood was a flick Channel 10 (WBNS, Wolfe Boots News n' Shoes, Columbus, OH) would trot out (Seemingly every two months.) often for Chillers' late nite double feature on Fridays. For some odd reason(s) I actually loved this bit of cheez. Maybe it was the upbeat moodiness of the first half coupled with the claustrophobic eiriness/oppressiveness of the second. I do know I always liked Basil Rathbone. Don't think I would have bothered to watch if he wasn't in it (Kind of like Battle of the Worlds.  For me, Claude Rains "made" that picture.).

Article copyright © 9-22-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

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WRONG! ..... JUST WRONG!

Shot in 3D? Should have just been shot!

     
      Just got back from work. Saw something that tripped the gag reflex. Was going through the lobby of  the college I work at & happened to look up at the TV. I had what Sarah Palin would say to be a WTF moment. I saw evil, travesty ..... blasphemy! I saw a trailer for something that alleged to be The Three Musketeers.

      Alexandre Dumas is rolling, nay, spinning in his grave. He's turning over so hard he's air conditioning the whole cemetary! What in blazes is Hollywood trying to pull!

      Ninjas? (I think that's what they were.) Flamethrowers? Female swordsperson? (Roll the eyes.) Dirigibles? I've read the book. Have seen more than one version of this story (I understand the present piece of sacrilege to be a "reinvention" by another author.) on film. I don't remember any of THAT in there. I'd sooner see the Ritz Brothers, version than this.

       I will also sooner not see this piece of garbage. Never thought I'd be rooting for Richelieu.

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Third Impact On The Way October 21!



Sorry Evangelion fans. THE END ain't gonna happen this way!


                                Third Impact On The Way October 21

                                                            by

                                                                Jay Agan

      OK. So Harold Camping didn't get it quite right for May 21. Nobody vanished "in the twinkling of an eye" & nothing more than the usual chaos, murder, & mayhem has ocurred since. Mr. Camping says a "spiritual" judgement has been made by God & the actual rapture's gonna take place October 21 along with the destruction of the world. More than likely, nothing's gonna happen then either, & as it will be October, yours truely is probably gonna be watching old black 'n white horror flicks then, howsomever .....

      When 10-21 or therabouts rolls around & you start to hear Komm Susser Tod (Come Sweet Death) playing in the background. ..... Run!

      Run! Run like you've never run before in your entire life. Run til your heart stops. Run til you can run no more & ..... Keep running.

      While it may be true that no one gets away from Lillith-Rei, it doesn't hurt to try. Yes, she may "know" the desires of everyones' heart making resistance futile (In my case she'd appear as a girlfriend from LONG ago who I should NOT have broken up with.). Give it a go anyway.

      Don't say I didn't warn you. You're on your own.

      Well, no one can accuse me of not tipping 'em off. It's every man for himself & I've got a new pair of track shoes. Yessir! No "liquid nirvanna" for me! I'm ready to ..... Huh? ..... Well hi hon! I haven't seen you in ..... Wait a minute! You're not her! YOU'RE NOT HER! No way you're gonna get me! It'll be a cold day in ..... What the!? .....How'd you get ahead a' me! ..... YIKE! .....Splat! ..... burble ..... burble .....

      LCL. Wotta you got that sticks or squeaks?

Article copyright © 9-20-2011 Jay Agan

Neon Genesis Evangelion: OOOOO! Goodies In The Mail! here.

End of Evangelion: This Is (Really) Disturbing here.

Pastor Strangelove or How I Learned to Stop Worrying & Love the Apocalypse here.

On the Rapture, Third Impact, Armageddon & All That here.

Expert Predicts Third Impact to Hit May 21! here.

Evangelion 2.0: I Can (Not) Get Into This here.

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Atragon: One That Grew On Me

                                          Atragon: One That Grew On Me

                                                                  by

                                                                     Jay Agan

      In my younger days, I really got to hate this one.

      The early 70s were a time when Screen Gems' Shock Theater package was pretty much played out as TV stations had their pick of other horror/sci-fi selections. For some reason (cheep?) Channel 10 (WBNS Columbus, Ohio) got one or more crammed with these (then) execrable Italian, Spanish, & Japanese flicks. We could only get four stations (Cable wouldn't come out our way.) so I had to make do with 10s' Chiller Theater for my diet of the fantastic.

      Because of the above situation the 30s, 40s & 50s classics Famous Monsters of Filmland had me so hyped up over were few & far between. When one was on, it was usually as the second feature on Chillers' double bill for Friday night. I wasn't allowed to stay up late except on Friday/Saturday & only then for the first movie. The "good" folks at 10 had a nasty habit of putting the crappy one of the two on first thus the "classic" was out of reach (Today, a lot of these clinkers are considered classics & must sees!). I really got to hate Dan Imel & later Fritz the Nite Owl for that.

      One of these "cheezits" was Atragon. It was to Chiller Theater what Trouble With Tribbles was to channel 4s' (WLWC/WCMH Columbus, Ohio) Star Trek scheduling. PLAYED TO DEATH! I was something of a media snob & wanted only stuff from 30s to 50s. Foriegn films, especially Tohos' unbearable cheesiness of being, were too much for me. Atragon came to symbolize all that I then disliked in Japanese movies. The flick itself is draggy at times & the commercials certainly didn't help it any.

      Synopsis: Before the Mu Empire makes its' moves on Japan & the rest of the earth, it tries through covert means, to destroy its' only real opposition: Captain Jingujis' super submarine, Atragon. The captain is more interested in securing the glory of Japan until the bad guys snatch his daughter. Then it's a harrowing escape & a battle royal against Mu & their serpent/dragon god Manda. You know the Mu Empire is mean as the empress has a head of Chernobyl red hair to rival anything in anime.
     
      In 2005, I attended the Ohayocon anime convention at the Hyatt Regency in Columbus (I prepped myself the night before by watching Frank Capras' Know Your Enemy: Japan.). There, while fishing around for goodies in the dealers room, I came across a table selling live action films (There was a table next to it with a young lady YELLING out "We got yaoi!" every so often. Sheesh!). Scrabbling through a stack, I found Atragon. Not having seen it in over 20 years, I thought, "why not?" The price was right so I snapped it up.

      Big difference. Seeing something in color, widescreen, & NO commercials I actually got to liking it. Tsuburayas' spfx don't look so cheezy when viewed properly. From hated film to one liked. It's not a bad little time waster.

Article copyright © 9-17-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

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Evangelion: Keel Lorenz And The Face Of Evil

Keel Lorenz, he's from (is) the government, & wants to help you. But!
Would you buy a used car from this man? Credit: Gainax

     
      A disclaimer of sorts: Keel Lorenz is a fictional character in the Neon Genesis Evangelion anime franchise. Feel free however, to subsititute the name of your "favorite" politician, do-gooder/altruist, cause, or organisation of your choice, fictional or otherwise.
                                  
                              
                                  Evangelion: Keel Lorenz And The Face Of Evil

                                                                   by

                                                                        Jay Agan

      Keel Lorenz is an imposing personality of great power and influence but don't let that put you off. Beneath that remote, lofty exterior beats a heart of purest gold. He is a very good, very caring person. A paragon of empathy. His care so vast. His concern so great. His compassion ..... beyond boundless.

      He intends to do you and everyone else a BIG favor.

      Mr. Lorenz has a grand vision. And an even grander plan to go with it. A vision/plan so vast, it encompasses the entire world. And YOU and every living soul are a part of it. When one is out to save all of humanity it can't be anything else.

      Mr. Lorenz & the SEELE organisation feel your pain. As a fellow human being he knows of the emptiness in the soul of each & every person and of the fear, conflict and lonliness resulting from that emptiness. And he has the remedy. However .....

      Much sacrifice is needed. On the part of each and every living creature on the face of the planet.

      To implement the FINAL SOLUTION to the weary struggle of living, drastic measures, or at least one drastic measure is to be done.

      No sacrifice too dear. No ideal too sacred. No individual life too precious to be offered upon the alter of the ultimate in altruism: The Human Instrumentality Project.

      Think long and hard. It takes more than a lot to bring about a vision of Heaven on earth. It takes all.

Article copyright © 9-14-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

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Dang! Part 6: Laurence Fishburne & The Matrix

OK. So you just meet someone on the net. You get taken to an abandoned building where
you're told a wild story about reality. You're offered drugs in order to clear up things as
to wether they're real or not. Do you take them? Sure you do!
Credit: Warner Bros.

                               Dang! Part 6: Laurence Fishburne & The Matrix

                                                                  by

                                                                      Jay Agan

      It's early '99 & out on a date with Sweet Sue. In the mood for some sci-fi we decide to take in The Matrix.

      Early the film is confusing to some. We get along fine, but the female half of the couple behind us is having trouble & keeps asking her boyfriend about what's going on. This is getting mildly irksome but the problem solves itself in short order.

      It's the part where Laurence Fishburnes' Morpheus character explains the situation to Keanu Reeves' Neo.

      There's Morpheus, for awhile twirling that shiney little pill case. Talking in clipped phrases in that ..... dull ..... semi-slow ..... monotone. Our eyes now on the now ..... motionless ..... pill ..... case. Semi-slow ..... monotone ..... shiney ..... little ..... pill ..... case. Listen ..... closely ..... as ..... I ..... say .....

      I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I immediately picked up on it. The Wachowsky brothers were using "hypnotism" to move the story along! I felt a little offended but .....

      The theater was quiet, you could feel the calm silence on the audience descending & soothing the spectators as they took it all in.

      It was quite effective. How do I know? The young lady behind us stopped asking her boyfriend for the remainder of the film.

      By the way. Don't take pills from strangers.

Article copyright © 9-6-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

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Dang! Part 5, Son Of Blob: THE BLOB ATE THE KITTY!

Happy little scene just before fluffy gets it.

                      Dang! Part 5, Son Of Blob: THE BLOB ATE THE KITTY!

                                                                  by

                                                                      Jay Agan

      So I'm staying with the parents in Jersey while getting an education. Time off, I'm taking in New York City area TV of the 1980s (Dismal!). It's a Saturday afternoon & the set's tuned to either WNEW or WWOR when Son of Blob is broadcast. I had no intention of seeing this Larry Hagman directed turkey again. Howsomever ..... I have two sisters, both LOVE cats as do I. So .....

      The beginning of Son of Blob (SOB) has Godfrey Cambridge thawing out a sample of the creature (How he got it & why he's doing it is not clear.). While waiting he's off somewhere else. A little orange kitten wanders in & is "assimilated" by the mass of glop.

      My sister's in the other room & being the caring brotherly type (Not!) I wanted her to take this in. So I call out:

      "Hey sis! Here's something ya gotta see! A really cute little kitty!"

      Instantly conned, she rushes in.

      "Huh?"

      "Blob's gonna eat the kitty!"

      "What?"

      "Blob's gonna eat the kitty!"

      "No way, not in ..... Ohhh! Noooooooooo!"

      "Fluffy" gets caught by the first tendril & it's curtains for the cat.

      "AAAAAAUUUGH!!!"

     A total mix of emotions! She's laughing, smiling, blubbering & in "shock" all at the same time. She knows it's not real & the special effects are laughably phoney but ..... THE BLOB'S EATING THE KITTY!
    
      "Ruthie!?" Mom calls from the kitchen. "What's going on!?"

      "Noooooooo!"

      As the monstrosity (In this shot, a rubber glove covered in gelatin.) carries off the little fuzzy darling who's letting out a piteous mewing sound, I give it my best faux sympathetic, semi-falsetto, "good ..... bye ..... kitty!"

      Sister totally "breaks down", half laughing, half blubbering runs to the kitchen .....

      "The blob ate the kitty!"

     "What?"

      "THE BLOB ATE THE KITTY!"

      "Jay! What's going on!? Get in here!"

      "Aw, Mom ....."

      "Now what happened?"

      "Oh ..... the blob ate the kitty," in my best matter of fact manner.

      "You ..... and ..... your ..... STUPID ..... movies!"

      Sister's still laughing/"crying" while Mom lectures me on brain rot, the "boob tube", & stupid movies.

      Meanwhile, our orange cat Sydney, is snoozing peacefully in the magazine basket under the TV stand.

Article copyright © 9-2-2011 Jay Agan

You Tube link to original Blob movie theme here.

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.