Superfluous-ity

                                                 Superfluous-ity

                                                            by

                                                                Jay Agan

      "Hey Jay! There's a movie I saw a long time ago I'd like to see again. Need some info."

      "Sure, what title?"

      "I don't know."

      "Who was in it?"

      "Haven't the foggiest."

      "Uh ...... Know what kind of flick it was?"

      "Nope."

      "(!?) ..... Anything about the plot?"

      "No idea ..... "

      "Well how do you expect me to ....."

      "Aw c'mon Jay! You oughta know.  It ..... it has that guy in it."

      "(Sigh.) What guy?"

      "I DON'T KNOW!"

      "Well shoot! I need something to go on ..... "

      "I don't know! ..... You know!? ..... THAT GUY!"

      " ..... !?!?"

      " ..... Uh ..... He was in a bunch of movies & TV shows ..... "

      "Which ones?"

      "I ..... DON'T ..... KNOW!"

      "#%@&*!"

      Honest folks. This actually happened to me once.

                             This sad story copyright © 4-26-2011 Jay Agan

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When Worlds Collided

Credit: Paramount Pictures

                                        
                                                   When Worlds Collided

                                                                  by
                                                
                                                                      Jay Agan

      Back in '89, the Columbus Museum of "Art" had a special effects film fest for several weeks & I attended a few showings. One of the films was George Pals' When World Collide. I'd not seen this one on a "bigger" srcreen & wondered what it'd be like with an audience. As it turned out, I could have done without the audience.

      The dweeb running the show got up to give his 1/2 cent worth. The fool sneers at the idea that any such undertaking of manned space travel (Let alone saving humanity.) could be done by free enterprise (He couldn't bring himself to say "Capitalism". Maybe he thought it would sound too political.). No, only government was capable (The brand names on all that equipment at NASA notwithstanding.) After his spiel we get to the movie.

      Well , it's going great until we get a view of the (Obvious model.) space ark. The mob of  oh so sophistacated/annointed ones bust out laughing (They also got a few chuckles over the monologue of how a man gets to genuinly praying in a time of real crisis.).

     What did these Phillistines expect? An excellent film released in 1953, they didn't have the tech for the advanced special effects of '89 (Or of today for that matter.). When I first saw this film as a kid, I knew of the limitations, took that into account, & enjoyed the show. These barbarians seemingly couldn't. I at least had some satisfaction with the audience getting into the flick as the drama & tension built up (The scene with the wheelchair bound villian gunning down his rebellious flunky got their attention & surprise!).

      I'm reminded of an instance where this jerk I talked with was insistant about no movie was worth watching if the spfx didn't meet up with todays' standards. How does one explain culture to a savage? Or a newspaper to an idiot!

                                         Article copyright © 4-19-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

Dang! Part II: Split Second

Credit: RKO Pictures

                                        
                                              Dang! Part II: Split Second

                                                                 by

                                                                    Jay Agan

      Early sixties. Don't know why I bothered with a flick like this (I must have been 10 or 11 then.). It wasn't a cartoon, war, or monster movie. It did have an old west ghost town & that must have been what kept me watching Split Second. The story took place in an "A-bomb" test area (Maybe I was hoping for a war movie.).

      These cons bust out of prison & hide out on a nuke range, planning to take off just before blast time (The authorities wouldn't think of looking there!). Complicating matters are some hostages taken along the way. Don't know how I was able to patiently wade through the drama & commercials but I did.

      The last minute warnings go off & the baddies "git to goin'" while the protagonists duck into an old mine. Taking a wrong turn, the crooks & the moll find themselves at the base of the bomb tower. After some screaming & tire squealing they backtrack through the ghost town & the bomb goes off.

       The special effects crew did an admirable job. The town gets flattened & .....

      Car is spun into the air, womans' scream cut off in mid pitch, cut to mushroom cloud.

      Yes. That's right! Dang!

      You have to see this movie to know what I mean.

                                              Article copyright © 4-17-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

The Passion of Ayn Rand: Man, This REALLY Creeps Me Out!



Horror? Documentary? Bio pic? You decide!
Credit: Producers Ent. Group, HBO

                                         
                    The Passion of  Ayn Rand: Man, This REALLY Creeps Me Out!

                                                                  by

                                                                     Jay Agan

      I like Ayn Rands' works. I've a whole shelf of them. The Fountainhead is in my collection. I consider myself an Objectivist (Small "o". I don't believe that in order to be a true individual I have to do EVERYTHING Ayn Rand says.). I am pretty much an adherent of her philosophy.

      It was with some interest that I snapped up a vhs tape of The Passion of Ayn Rand in a thrift shop a few years back. In spite of it being an "anti" Rand film, I enjoyed it & still do. Maybe she was horrid in person. She certainly had her faults. That only makes her more human to me.

     Horrid or not. It doesn't take  any validity away from her belief system. Actually, very little of Rational Objectivism is original (Aristotle, et al.). Rand was just very good in codifying & laying it all out in an understandable manner.

      Something, however, happened. A most startling revelation hit me while I was viewing the tape for the fourth or fifth time over a several month period. I wasn't looking for it. It hit me between the eyes totally without warning.

      Many may disagree about Helen Mirrens' portrayal of Ms. Rand. I'm sure Peikoff & co. do. Wether or not Mirren accurately played the part of Ayn Rand or not, one thing is for sure: She was  certainly spot on with someone else.

      While watching, it dawned on me: The facial expressions. The gestures. The voice.  The histrionics. The eyes! That ..... heavy ..... "Slavic" ..... accent.

      "Oh my God!" I thought. "It's impossible! It can't be! But it's true!"

Could Helen Mirren & Lugosi be one &
the same? The mind boggles. I know I'm
boggled! credit: Universal Pictures.

     
      He's back! Bela Lugosi is back!

      Helen Mirren as Ayn Rand. If Lugosi had been a woman, this is what (s)he would have looked & sounded like! This was better than Martin Landaus' portrayal in Ed Wood (I was & still am pleased over his getting best supporting actor Oscar in '95.)!

      Yes! He's back! More terrifying & chilling than ever! Don't miss ..... BELA LUGOSI! In ..... The Passion of Ayn Rand!

                                             Article copyright © 4-14-2011 Jay Agan

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DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.
    

Dang! Part 1: Dr. Strangelove



WHAT A WAY TO GO! RIDE 'EM SLIM! RIDE 'EM!
Credit: Hawk Films, Columbia Pictures

                                        
                                         Dang! Part 1: Dr. Strangelove

                                                            by

                                                               Jay Agan

      It's a Friday evening in the late 60s, I get in the celler & flip through our whopping 3 (count em!) channels on our older second set when I stumble on something on ch 10 (WBNS). I see this B52 bomber backed up by somber music winging its way over & through fields of icebergs & stop to watch.

      Seems the bomb bay doors won't swing open & this "cowboy" goes down, sits on the nose of an "A-bomb" & starts fiddling with some faulty, sparking "electronics" in the "ceiling".

      Some tense moments in the cockpit as target is sighted then back to the "cowboy". He must have got the doors working because they swing open & OUT with the bomb he goes. I couldn't believe what I was seeing! He's still straddling the bomb, holding on with one hand, waving his hat with the other & yahooing like he's riding a bucking bronc. ALL THE WAY DOWN! Then Ka-stinking-BOOM! Break to commercial. What the ..... ?



Got this one from Motifake.com. Check em out!


      I go upstairs for something to drink. I must have had this spooked look on my face as Dad asks, "what's wrong?"

      "I just saw a cowboy ride an atom bomb to the ground!"

      "You're watching Dr. Strangelove."

      It was strange all right! I hadn't seen anything that wierd since I'd seen Goldfinger get sucked out of the plane.

      I go back & finish the show in all seriousness (I was too young to appreciate satire.) & sat through the armageddon planning. That surreal ending montage with Vera Lynn & co. singing We'll Meet Again accompanied by mushroom cloud footage spooked me a bit as well.

      Though the "red scare" was long over by then, the "cold war" was in full swing. At that moment, young as I was, I didn't find those scenes at all funny. Years later (Now having the film in my collection.) I now appreciate the films' wit & humor. But then .....

      Those scenes will always haunt me. At least now, for the laughs.

                                         Article copyright © 4-12-2011 Jay Agan

Major Kong rides the bomb. You Tube link here.

Dr. Strangelove trailer. You Tube link here.

Dr. Strangelove ending scene. You Tube link here.

Previous Strangelove article here.

Go to Main Page here.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

April Snowers

                                                        April Snowers

                                                                 by

                                                                    Jay Agan

      April 4. I look out from the loading dock at work. Snowing again. There's an old saying in Ohio: "Don't like the weather? Wait a few minutes. It'll change." Ohio ("What's round on the ends & high in the middle, O-HI-O!" Yuck! Yuckity, yuck!) is an old Native American word for "Too darn hot. Too darn cold. Too darn wet. Too darn dry."

      When Delaware was an Indian village on the Olantangy River named Pluggystown (Named after a Mingo chief.), two trappers were heading north on a path what was later to become Sandusky Street. Heading south was an elderly native grumbling rather loudly to himself. One of the trappers called out to him, "what's wrong with you?"

      "Oh Hwah Yo!" And he walked on.

      The trapper turned to the other guy. "Y'know? When this territory opens up. that'd make a great name for a state!"

      OK! Don't believe me! See if I care!

                                        Article copyright © 4-9-2011 Jay Agan

Go to main page here.

This article may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

     

"Trials" of a Voice Actor Part 3

                                         "Trials" of a Voice Actor Part 3

                                                               by

                                                                  Jay Agan

      I get home after a particularly arduous day at work & am greeted with a message on the machine from my agent. "Get down to XYZ Studio at 10 AM for an anti-smoking radio spot. Pays 200 etc....." O.K!.

      Anti-smoking? Hmmmm. I don't mind telling folks what a dumb thing it is to smoke. No sense in hurting yourself & others. Yet .....

      I e-mail the agent inquiring wether this is a simple public service announcement or an advocacy of an anti-smoking LAW. He sends me the script.

      It was as I feared. The Dept. of Health & Human Services of a state out west wanted to innaugurate the activation of a new LAW voted in by the state legislature a year before. The law affected private businesses (Bars, restaraunts, etc.). The ad agency doing the ad thought my voice perfect for it. Wrong!

      As a small L libertarian I believe one has the right to kill oneself as fast or slow as desired as long as no one else is harmed. The government has no right to declare private businesses/property to be public places (If you can't stand the smoke/heat, get the heck out of the bar/kitchen!).

      I e-mailed the agent & declined, giving my reasons.

      I could have used the 200 bucks (less agents' 20%.). I could have used the exposure (My voice would have been heard all over the state extolling Big Brother.). To heck with it. There are some things I won't do for money.

      About a month later, around contract renewal time, I get an e-mail from the agent informing me that due to the bad economy, they were dropping me & others from their roster.

      I would like to thank all the well meaning politicians from both parties for helping to make my life less than it could be. It is because of their well intentioned efforts that I & many others have had to put our dreams on hold. Again, thank you. Now go "help" someone else. Like Libya for instance.

                                         Article copyright © 4-5-2011 Jay Agan

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Can Someone Tell Me What's Going On?

      When I started this blog I was hoping for a lot of hits as anyone would. It started slow & things began to "pick up" in February (380 hits.). Some were starting to notice. March started out at the same rate until Japans' crisis took precedence & peoples' attention diverted to that. When after it took a back seat to the fracas in Libya, the blogs' hit rate started to climb again though I doubted the last week and a half of March would get past 250 let alone the 380 of February.

      Then a strange thing happened & is still going on. I get home from work in the AM on the 28th of March & go online to check my stats. At the right end of the chart I see this flurry of activity. 43 hits for that day! (That was a  lot at that point. In February I got 25 one day & thought that was a big deal at the time.)

      Seems one of my articles got popular. I wrote Call of Cthulhu: One Really Worth Watching back on February 20 over a month ago. I'd like to think it's because it's a great article (Of course it is. I wrote it! My being humble prevents me from telling you how GREAT this GREAT article is. That's me, humble & proud of it!) about a great movie, but as just about all of the hits are coming from Google Image Search, I think it's because a lot of people want to snag that image, a demotivational poster I snagged from elsewhere. I hope some of these folks actually read the article (It's now over 500 hits on it!).
     
      The only connection I can see for such interest is the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society is putting the finishing touches on their latest film The Whisperer In Darkness & taking it to some film fests in Europe, thus the attention. I haven't found anything on a major studio releasing anything Lovecraft related.

      Anyone know what's going on?

You Tube link to Call of Cthulhu trailer here.

You Tube link to The Whisperer In Darkness trailer here.

You Tube link to The Whisperer In Darkness trailer 1 here.

You Tube link to The Whisperer In Darkness trailer 2 here.

Link to H.P. Lovecrafts' Dark Heritage article here.

Go to Main Page here.

Azumanga Daioh, the Abridged Series An Episodic Review

                                       Azumanga Daioh, the Abridged Series

                                                     An Episodic Review

                                                                  by

                                                                     Jay Agan

      This is a short (5 eps), sweet (Each less than 5 minutes.) little parody that got more than a few laffs out of me. Azumanga Daioh screams Parody Me! & there are more than a ton of them on You Tube. This has to be one of the best.

      1. Day One- We're introduced to the main characters. High points:

      Chiyo: "I'm supposed to tell you I'm a prodigy student but lying makes me feel bad inside."

      We find Osakas' original nick-name was Xanax at her old school because of episodic reactions. Tomo promises her quite a hazing in the next ep.

      Tomo: "Kill ya tomorrow newbie!"

      Osaka: "The more things change, ..... the more they suck!"

      2. Initiation- Osaka tries to concentrate on avoiding "that hyperactive girl" but is distracted by the posterior of a male student at the blackboard ("Oooo! Osaka likeee!"). Tomo & the others finally latch onto her &: Cafeteria food (Barf!), motor skills (fail), chugging (More barf!), & the old standby, beatings.

      Sakaki: "Oh! You guys started without me. Thanks a friggin' lot!"

      Osaka: "If it makes you feel any better, they haven't broken my spirit! My chest plate maybe ..... but not my spirit!"

      Yomi: "I admit. I thought you'd lose conciousness or start crying like a baby ..... like the ten year old."

      Osaka realizes they did it out of love & "..... for everything you've done to me, I promise ..... REVENGE!"

      3. Spending Time Wasted- Chiyo explains her wealth comes from a school tax exemption. Yukari starts a fire at school so she can leave work early & get drunk.

      Minamo: "..... stop dancing in front of children like that. It's disgraceful!"

      Chiyo: "You can start pole dancing for all I care. Just let me go back to my old school!"

      4. Master Plan- Chiyo attempts to drown Yukari. The kids find out Kimura's a pedo & plot to land him in jail but he "buys them off".

      Chiyo: "I'm sure glad I'm not you girls. There's no way he'd be interested in someone my age ..... right?" (Just goes to show, being a genius doesn't necessarily mean you're smart!)

      Tomo: "Yomi, you've compromised our safety for the next three years. But this ice cream is pretty good."

      Yomi: "Yeah. I'd say it was an even trade."

      5. Excursion- Instead of going to Sea World, the teachers decide to accompany the kids to Chiyos' summer home instead. Chiyos' little monologue on how she spends her wealth & spare time is a hoot & and a half.

      Yukari: "Who wants to ride with their favorite teacher?"

      Osaka: "The scent of death is on this car ..... It's fresh!"

      Osaka: "She tries to play on a Game Boy! While drivin'!"

      There are too many more yucks n' chuckles in this last ep so I'll leave them to you to experience.

      Chiyo: "Osaka tried to kill me with a firecracker! I wanna go home!"

                                        Article copyright © 3-31-2011 Jay Agan

Episode 1: Azumanga Daioh the Abridged Series here.

Azumanga Daioh, Too ..... Much ..... Cute here.

Where Are They Now? The Kids of Azumanga Daioh here.

Go to Main Page here.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied in whole or in part. Please cite proper credit & backlink.

Humor In the Eye of the Non-Beholder

                                        Humor In the Eye of the Non-Beholder

                                                                   by

                                                                      Jay Agan

      I don't like "happy" people. Not only are they "happy" but they want you to be "happy" too. "Happy" for no particular reason. You've met them.

      "C'mon! Smile!" They say.

      "Why?" You answer.

      "Because!"

      "Because what?"

      "Just because!"

      Irrational. If there's no cause then there's no because.

      "Do you know it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile?" A favorite mantra of theirs. Your not smiling doesn't necessarily mean you're frowning. They mistake a relaxed face as a frown. Then again, they mistake a lot of things for unhappiness.

      Ayn Rand stated to the effect that happiness is the positive emotion recieved through achieving something from following your own values. You have to be happy for a reason. Happiness for no reason is irrational, corrupt, chaotic. I worked in an institution for several years & encountered a lot of smiling, "happy" people.

      Unlike most Randroids, if I'm feeling good for no reason I'm not going to hit the brakes & try to find a reason for it. I'll go with it. A little spontaneous irrationality can be fun. But to "consciously" drum up causless "happiness"? To feel good on command? Ridiculous! Reminds me of that Huckleberry Hound cartoon where as Robin Hood he exhorts his not so merry men to "Yuck it up!". They in turn go "Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! Yuck!".

      Those who insist on irrationally feeling good are the most unhappy of all. They aren't out to find happiness as much as they are looking for unhappiness to cure. If they can't find it they'll make it up.

      Here's a fer instance. I was a cashier at an unmentionable merchandising chain (Not Wal-Mart by the way.) & met/collided with all sorts of people. As this place had a pharmacy this included some of the over/under medicated.

      So I'm bantering with a customer about "Murphys Laws of Combat" (A set of bogus "rules" based on Murphys Law: If anything can go wrong, it will. At the worst possible moment.). A form of "black humor" (Laughing/contempt for death is a positive thing.) that's brought more than a chuckle or two to many (Friendly fire isn't, incoming has right of way, if the enemy is in range so are you, etc.).

      While I'm checking the fellow out, the woman next in line couldn't help but hear & interjected, "Oooooooo! How negative! We should concentrate of positive things!"

      How does one explain "black humor" (Or humor for that matter.) to a fanatic like that? How do you present anything as positive to one bound & determined to find negativity wherever/whenever, & if not find it, make it up? You can't.

      In their quest to stamp out unhappiness they have become the very evil they fight. These humorless trolls see misery wherever they go wether it's there or not. In doing so they grasp at a causeless, artificial state of levity to counter the unhappiness, real or imagined, they have found & must drum it up constantly. In going after the devil, the devil has got them.

                                        Article copyright © 3-29-2011 Jay Agan

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"Trials" of a Voice Actor, Part II

                                        
                                          "Trials" of a Voice Actor, Part II

                                                                 by

                                                                    Jay Agan

     It was March '09. The end year/new year "slump" is over & activity in the voice over field was going to pick up. Already had three "gigs" under my belt & was confident things would "look up". Little was I to know the polititians on both sides of the aisle, had the recession "cemented in" for a good long while to come (My agency later informed me the economy was the reason why things slowed down. It was also the reason they dropped me over a year later.). A conversation with my voice teacher (She also owns a studio.) revealed that this field is "a leading economic indicator" and is one of the first hit. I guess a lot of peoples' dreams have been put on hold.

     So I get this call from the agency. I was to "get ready" as someone from a nationwide car insurance company heard my demo & liked it. Nothing definite but I was on the list of choices for a radio spot or two. All right!

     Two days later, another call. They settled on someone else. Those are the breaks. You can imagine my disappointment.

     It wouldn't have been so bad had they settled on someone with a better voice .....

     Yeah. Ego plays a part.
                                           
                                          Article copyright © 3-27-2011 Jay Agan

"Trials" of a Voice Actor, Pt I here.

Go to Main Page here.