Thursday, March 31, 2016

The Porn Trolling of Haruhi Suzumiya: Chapter Three of a Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction Story

The Porn Trolling of Haruhi Suzumiya: Chapter Three of a Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction Story


C V Ford


Chapter 3: The Plan Hits the Fan

On the way home, in a county over, Carl stopped at a Pantera Bread eatery with net access and logged in to his "bogus" account on Otaku Fiction dot net.

Or tried to.


Seeing a couple other addys responsive ...

"Could it be?"

Entering Otakufiction dot net and "website not available" on Goggle revealed some blog entries and articles on other sites mentioning the same. As Quad Chan had a couple threads on it, he clicked on those links.

As he suspected, Otakufictions' servers were overloaded with access requests for taking a look at his story. As effective as a DOS attack. It would be a few days before Carl, or anyone else, could again access the site.

On a separate thread, as a "public service", a "thoughtful" soul who had previously saved the story to his hard drive, posted the story for one and all to read. The responses consisted of repeats of what Carl had read some days before.

A LOT of them aimed at the poster instead of Carl. Others about the media stir.


Remote clicked, Carl settled in for some evening news.

"Cartoon porn story causing a rukus in the far east ... Caution: You are now entering 'the no spin zone'."

"Yeah Willy," thought Carl. "Where theirs stops and yours begins."

"Breaking tonight, tensions heat up in the far east over a most distasteful piece of amateur writing. Good evening and welcome to the Pelly File everyone. I'm Mavis Pelly. The many years long debate over free speech and political correctness never ceases and ..."

"Taking a break from trashing El Donaldo I see," the amateur writer surmised.

"Later on the program ... Donald Trumps' landslide win in last weeks' primary in --- ---- fell short a quarter of a percentage point in pundits predictions. An obvious indicator of his soon to be coming inevitable fall? I'll be talking with several personally handpicked and unbiased commentators ... "

"Oops!" Carl grinned. "Spoke out of turn!"

"Welcome to Hanitee and tonight ... Should there be a limit on free speech? Should restraint be imposed if something even approaches the limits of what we term good taste and manners ..."

"Yup," Carl observed. "Even the Hannitoad weighing in."

It wasn't that Carl actually liked Faux  ... Fox ... News Channel. He only found it more palatable than the propaganda peddled by CNN (Commie News Net) or PMSNBC et al. He figured if anyone was to give him a more "fair and balanced" crucifixion in trying him in absentia/anonymity, it would be them.

He was not disappointed.

All three programs of the nightly Fox line-up panned anime in general, his story in particular, and decrying indecency, racism, and the sad state of the present situation between the U.S. and Japan.

All three had Vaughn Williams doing his circular, repetitive non-schtick regarding racism and anything else coming to mind.

Don Stossel, the only libertarian and thus one of the only two half coherent voices, warning against censorship and the right of expression was repeatedly put on the defensive.

A guesting Anne Coltrane, while not in favor of Carls' story, at least came to the defense of Don more than once.

Above the fray, Charles Katzenjammer repeatedly declined comment, stating he'd rather talk about something ... ANYTHING ... but that.

The "montages" ... Images and vids of anime clips (Hey! It's Haruhi! ... What th- ... Pokemon?), Japanese members of the Diet speechifying, Sec. of State John Wearys' comments about the situation with Japan, extra-censored doujinshi pages and hentai, civil/feminist rights screeds, bad cosplay, military, etc., peppered the programs.

Carl didn't know wether to laugh, cry ... or throw up.

With commercials punctuating, he flipped between Fox and the other non-news channels catching prominent celebs, politicians, and other would be saviors of the collective soul putting in their one cent worth.

Anderson Hooper and Wolf Blitzky presiding over the ceremonies at CNN and with Carls' story and the rukus it caused as a pretext, the emphasis was more on the lefts' pet social issues than anime/manga.

Faux conservative/CNN suck-up, Hugh Hewlit adding to the din with his neo-cuckservative view of how the world should and must be. Celebs like George cLooney (Always upset about Elia Kazan and the Cold War ending "badly".) and Jane Fondue, ranting endlessly about the story being a prime example of the "war on womyn" and the callous insensitivity of those who never agreed with them on any and everything.

Gloria Stoneman even showed up. Crawling out of semi-retirement, condemning everything male dominated (ie. EVERYTHING!) then waxing sentimental on her salad days as empress of the feminist movement and her infiltration of the Playmate empire back in the '70s.

On the campaign trail, Pellys' program used the issue for a swipe at her "favorite" presidential candidate by airing a segment of a speech he gave earlier that day.

"Look ... I'm not really saying Japanese cartoons are either bad or good I mean I have a lot of friends in Japan made a lot of money there I get along with everybody 'n yet in the artistic aspect ... y'know ... they're just killin' us in the artwork thing I mean you look at the typical American cartoon versus the typical Japanese cartoon ... yeah! Yeah! ... I know I know ... AHHH NEEE MAY! ... It's all cartoons t' me ... but hey they're just killin' us in their cartoons art and free trade just like their trade agreements with them are done by political hacks so our cartoon artwork is done by artistic hacks even their comic books ... Yeah! ... Yeah! ... I know ...  you in the back with the Bernie sign ... it's MAAAANGAAA! ... manga's a fruit 'n so are you ... yeah get 'im outta' here ... GET 'IM OUTTA' HERE! ... go easy on 'em ... don't wanna' harm the disrupters ... the poor dears 're known to break easy ... go home to mommy ... go home to mommy ... GEEZ!"

"Kinda' harsh Don," declared Carl. "Still voting for you though."

"Ending tonights' segment of the O'Rly Factor, we're combining the Faction word of the day WITH ... the Faction tip of the day:

"IF ... when seeking employment ... ESPECIALLY in the child care industry ... don't ... And I mean DON'T ... be a ... lolicon.

"Yes ... That's an actual word ... Goggle it!"

"Well Willy," said Carl to himself reaching for the remote. "That's at least one thing we agree on."

"And remember ... here on the Faction ... We're looking out ... for YOU!"

Carl took that one a little more personally than usual.

He also noted ALL of the shows mentioning Otakufiction dot net still not issuing comment one way or the other. This was interesting especially in light of the fact they were resisting cooperation with the authorities on Constitutional grounds.

Taking Apples' example, they were standing on the First and Fifth Amendments ... And so far succeeding.

All the same, Carl was thankful for the foresight of his precautions. He remembered the bullkrap about the bogus blame put on a video in regard to the Benghazi follies.

The rest of the week had things dying down a bit. Up 'til Wednesday there was still a segment of each of the news programs devoted to "the controversy" then came to only a quick mention on it for several days after. Time and Life magazines had an article or two later that month, again summarizing the controversy and several pages of the history of anime and cartoons in general.


Over a month later, though things were dying down in regard to the controversy itself (Carl looking over his shoulder all the same.), other things were happening.

Some even good.

In spite of the negative coverage, positive interest in anime/manga was on the rise.  More people were speaking out in attempts at correcting the medias' biased reportage. Disc Sales were going up. Internet streaming sites getting more subscribers along with a higher renewal rate.

Due to the increase in interest, Funzymation ("You better be watching!") announced a reissue of the various Haruhi franchise series in new packaging and more extras. They were also doing the same treatment with other series that were put into Limbo when Banzai Visual stopped selling discs in the States. The latter company now regretting having sold the U.S. marketing rights to the former.

Even Nichijou was finally being put on the U.S. market! As it was mostly sight gags and the original Japanese dub being more than intense, it was decided NOT to do an English dub.

In a surprising development, Kyoto Animation announced tentative plans for a Haruhi third season!

Other companies, such as Sampai (Aka: NOT ADVision.), also benefited with sales going through the roof.

The Dalt Wisley Company supplemented their Miyazaki line-up by buying up the U.S. rights to Studio Giblet releases they didn't already have and with extras such as the music vids (On Your Mark, etc.) that were rarely seen.

AC/DC Comics and Marble started cutting in on the craze in attempts at buying the rights to varying franchises only to find the smaller "graphic novel" companies had beaten them to it many years before. They settled on mimicking the "manga art style" in some of their already established properties.

Cable companies that didn't have Ahnime Network were being bombarded by requests. 'Toon Network expanded their Toonznami and Adult Swimmer line-ups.

The world of fashion started making statements. Not only were designers making plans for cosplay type outfits and ensembles but the general look was was being seen on the street. The "ko-gal" look made itself evident as young Catholic ladies and other former privately educated students, on finding their parochial school uniforms still fit, took to wearing them again. Thrift shops and second hand stores were being combed for pleated skirts by the secular set, the shorter the better. Bright tartan patterns most sought after.

This, the ex-Catholic Carl found somewhat disturbing.

Not so disturbing was the Misty/Pokemon gestalt. He found it most interesting that so many late teen and twenty-somethings were effecting that look ... Nothing like a nicely filled out pair of Daisy Dukes! (1)

All in all, Carl noted, something positive was starting to emerge. Though things had gotten out of hand beyond his expectations, some of it was a good thing.

"I guess one man CAN ... make a difference," among his thoughts.

The thoughts ...

About to get "dark".

To be continued ...

Storyline (only) copyright © 3-4-2016 C V Ford


1. Daisy Dukes - Refers to the cut-off jeans worn by the Misty/Kasumi character from the first few seasons of the anime, Pokemon (Pocket Monsters).

The term first came into general use in the '1970s due to the Daisy Duke character in the TV comedy/action show, The Dukes of Hazzard. Played by Catharine Bach, part of her trademark attire were the sheer cut-off jeans she wore.


The Porn Trolling of Haruhi Suzumiya chapters 1, 2, and 4 Final Chapter.

Go to C V Fords' Anime Fan Fiction Page! here.

Go to C V Fords' profile page and anime fan fiction stories list on Fan Fiction dot net here.

Go to Fan Fiction dot net here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

Disclaimer: The preceding is a NON-PROFIT work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only. I make no claim to ownership of the copyrighted names/characters, places, and events mentioned in this work. They are the sole properties of  their respective owners. Please, by all means support the owners of such properties in the purchase and enjoyment of their works.

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

The Narrative: And the Beat Goes On

The Narrative: And the Beat Goes On


This is not true Islam.


Let us not descend into Islamophobia.


Islam has been hijacked by radicals.


Islamofascism is not the same.


War is peace.


Freedom is slavery.


Ignorance is strength.


No ... We are not pissing on you. IT REALLY IS LEMONADE!


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles after this means yer already there ... Kaboom!

Friday, March 25, 2016

The Porntrolling of Haruhi Suzumiya: Chapter Two of a Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction Story

The Porn Trolling of Haruhi Suzumiya: Chapter Two of a Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction Story


C V Ford


Chapter 2: According to plan ...

The next couple hours were spent touring the aforementioned shopping haunts in various metro suburbs. On espying another public library branch across the street from one such place, he decided on the next step. With a guest pass, he signed on to Otakufiction dot net and went to the Haruhi slot in the anime section.


Four reviews already (One with a fave and a follow with it.) and it hardly been online. Two were, to say the least, rather derogatory. One even threatening to report for abuse but no specifics. Another, as expected, concentrated mostly on the racist aspects.

"But no real complaint about the 'porn' itself," chuckling to himself. "Vile and racist as you say but I'll bet you read it in its' entirety nonetheless.

"Hmmm ... ," musing as he noted the number of 'repeats'. "Either you guys have twitchy index fingers or you decided to read it more than once. Hypocrites!"

The fourth was most interesting. It was from the writer of Haruhi pornfics who clued him in on the Disappearance of Yuki Nagato series. Alfonso Lings' stories were just about the only pornfics Carl would read, noted for their light, airy humor, interesting jokes and plot twists as well as "prurience". Carl was interested at the writers' reaction.

AL: "Not quite sure what you're trying to do here. Perhaps your 'depravity' runs deeper than mine. Your graphic descriptiveness is interesting to say the least. Don't care for the scat imagery though and the racism DEFINITELY needs to go.

"There's also the fact adult themed HS stories are difficult for me to relate to." :)

"My dear sir ... That I find rather (A LOT!) hard to believe." Carl smiled to himself. "Should I let him in on the joke? He'd definitely get a laugh out of it ... Naww! Let 'im 'stew' a bit with the rest." (1)

Accessing his other Otakufiction dot net proxy account, Senile Delinquent, he
"viewed" his story, posted a "follow" and a review.

"WOW! Love this stuff! Maybe you can continue this story huh? Please! Please! Please!

"Any more stories on the way?"

"A man of good taste and after my own heart," Carl complemented himself. "On to the next."


A couple hours later found Carl in a java cafe with internet access. Again accessing the site and Haruhi section he found yet another review posted ... an emotional, derogatory one full of platitudes, bible misquotes, generally calling down fire and condemning him to "tropical" regions after death.

This particular "review" irked Carl a bit. In place of the planned guest review and wanting to ramp things up a bit more, he addressed this one.

"@>(unspecified reviewer) I found this story quite offensive myself and was going to post a negative review as well. You however, have aroused my curiosity. Judging by the way you're judging, I see you might be a so-called Christian. I say so-called as ... well ... Just what the hell are YOU doing reading porn in the first place?

"Darn rapture bunnies!"

"Stick THAT up yer pipe and smoke it," Carl chuckled to himself.


Getting home late in the day, Carl decided on spending the rest of the day on the net. Visiting his usual sites, including otakufiction dot net, he did a later revisit of the site to check on his story.

For security, he only browsed as a guest. He certainly wasn't going to access the SixSick6 account from his home. Looking up the story in the Haruhi section brought him up short.

"Five more reviews and two more faves? Holy crud!"

Two were favorable ... Up to a point. While both liked the porn-ness, one was turned off a bit by the "racism" and the other didn't care for the scatological "references".

Looking up both their profiles he found them both to be pornfic writers. He was condemned by another reviewer as an evil racist expletive. Another, though a porn reader, thought Carl had gone "too damn far" and was going to report him to the mods.

One really stood out from the other four.

A self avowed KluKKer condemned the piece and him. How DARE he write such a story about white (?) girls being "used" by (Insert racist slur here.)!

"White?" Carl brought himself up short, laughing. "Yeah ... I guess ..."

Yes, he himself found it difficult at times to look on most anime characters as Asian/Japanese in spite of the names and trappings. The 'big eye, small mouth' art style(s) certainly didn't hurt in such shows being marketed internationally.
While out of town, a couple days later, he accessed through a machine in a library branch and left a guest reply:

"@> (unspecified reviewer) Reading your little tirade reminded me as to why I left the movement long ago. I ran into too many yahoos like you (That and the bad cosplay!). Ever since, I've long dreamed of what I'd do if elected fuhrer. A LOT of people would get a pass because the death camps (Converted NASCAR tracks.) would be too full of white trash like you for there to be any room for them. Whiteys' got his own genetic mess to clean and you're part of it!"


Most of the week passed, with more reviews, faves and follows coming in. More than the usual for a new story though nothing too fantastic, the number of reads on the story were over 150 that week. Reviews (Mostly condemnations, some with threats to report to the mods and a couple more surprising praises.) totaled about twenty that week up to that point. Actually quite good.

And the story had not been taken down by the mods.

"Odd," thought Carl. "With all the threats to report, you'd think the mods would have scrambled to take it down by now ... "

Getting up that Saturday, the would be master prankster went grocery shopping and decided to check the stats on his rogue account while in the next county over.
At a restaurant with net access he took what he thought would be a quick look.
The quick look turned out to be a hellaciously long triple take and a choking on his coffee.

"531 viewers!?" He stared dumbfounded at the screen. "Not counting the repeats? Gotta' be a glitch or something ... gotta' ... Fortythree more reviews as well!? Noooo!"

A scan of the reviews proved ominous, threatening, praising and enlightening.

The concensus evenly divided between those liking the story for various reasons, others hating for the same and those with mixed feelings about it. Too gross, too racist, too vulgar, not enough, too much, etc.. Two reviews in support of the KluKKer from before.

At least nine told him how the hit count got so high in such a short time and where to look.

Accessing the Anime and Manga section on the Quadchan imageboard website revealed a long thread from the night before.

"Ho-ly SH----------------T!" Carl screamed inwardly. "There's got to be several hundred entries in this thread!"

"Hey gais!" The opening post began. "You are NOT gonna' believe the Haruhi crackfic porn I just read on the Otakufiction dot net site. This has got to be either the best or the worst EV-AR! The messiness, the racism, the scatness! Man you're gonna' either love or hate this story I'm tellin' ya'. It makes that Chibi-usa pornfic from years ago look absolutely tame!" (2)

Another paragraph gave out info on the story in more detail. After about two hundred replies and counter replies the thread was shut down by a moderator informing one and all to pick back up on the subject in the Hentai section. The thread(s!) there were over a THOUSAND replies!

The next hour had Carl frantically scrolling up and down the threads in both sections trying to get the general mood of the mob.

There wasn't any. Though not in the majority, quite a few liked it, some even trying their hand at a paragraph or two attempting to outdo Carls' grotesquerie.

Others "commented" on the various aspects and their likes and hates of them.

"Moralfags" of all stripes abounded trying to outdo one another in their condemnation.

Again several so-called Christians out and out condemned the story (Again, why the heck are you so-calleds even reading it?).

Feminists piled on with their "disgusting, exploitative, demeaning, insensitive, 'war on womyn' " schtick.

Other feminists countered with "porn being liberating".

Both feminoid factions (With atheists and deists sprinkling the mix.) condemning all males to hell and gone.

Carl could only wonder.

"To say feminists are bats--t crazy is an insult to bats! Or bats--t for that matter."

The SJWs (Social justice stormtroopers ... er ... warriors.) were out in force. Going off on racism and hate to capillarying off into tirades of their own various tangents about capitalism, colonialism, sexism, size-ism (Discrimination against fat people!), fascism (Excluding their own brands of course.) and any other "isms" they could come up with on the spur of the moment.

Conservatives screamed for banning porn altogether (Again, what are you doing in the hentai section?).

Liberals defended porn on the grounds of freedom of speech ... excepting, of course, the porn (Or free speech.) they didn't like ... Which ... at that moment ... was Carls'.

The Haruhiists' were up arms ... albeit in a "tongue in cheek" way. How dare this guy indulge in such desecration of the goddess (Only WE can do that!)!

Others cautioned it was only an anime. One poor fool used the "C" word (Cartoon!) and his "position" was promptly overran and destroyed by a small army of trolls.

And all through the threads ... various other trolls as well as the Quadchan regulars had a field day engaging, debating ... baiting. And riling things up in general. Pick and choose ... Pick and choose ...

Some posts came across as more than ominous. Suggestions on tracing the writer of the story and doing him some dirt and how, gave Carl a chill. One post purporting to be from a member of ... Anonymous.

Carl recalled the Hal Turner (White supremacist turned FBI informant.) and Scientology debacles as well as "members" of that "non-organization" being instrumental in messing up child porn sites and even causing ISIS some grief.

Things he HEARTILY approved of.

"Hmm ... anyone can claim to be with Anonymous. Still ... ." He silently thanked himself for having taken precautions. Except for that one time on the first day when he had only accessed the story as a guest from his home, he never looked at it unless he was in another town.

"Well ... In the words of Super Chicken ... ," mused Carl, "'You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred.'" (3)

Heading home, he decided to not add any more "fuel to the fire", not even replying to reviews. The situation was fast going critical mass and beyond without any help from him.

"Yup! Chaos ... confusion ... hate and general discord," smiling to himself. "My work is done."



Sunday had Carl going about the rest of his weekend doing chores, tidying up, lounging around watching movies/'toons and generally trying to keep his mind off what may have been happening on Quadchan. As a further precaution, he decided to change passwords on his various net accounts. He doubted anyone could trace him but ...

Monday had him back at work. Lunchtime rolled around with him at a diner reading a copy of USA Today.

An article at the bottom of page one brought him up short ... Very short.


Carl picked his jaw up from the counter and continued reading.

While it was no secret that some Japanese government officials, including the present Prime Minister and a few in the Diet, were fans of anime and manga, it never occurred to Carl that any of them would "pick up" on his story let alone make a big stink of it. As it was, an English speaking lurker on Quadchan read the story a couple days previous and "relayed" it to a member of the lower house in the Diet. He in turn, passed it on to other members in both houses and the fracas took off from there.

So there it was ... Several Diet members, not all of them in the ruling party, were using the story to call attention to the problems with U.S. servicemen at Naha and Ginowan on Okinawa. Depravity, violence and immorality being vigorously denounced. One Diet member even took further offence over beloved anime characters from the last decade being used in such a degenerate work.

"Interesting they don't mention or question the morals, or lack of them, in their own manga and doujinshi industry," thought Carl. "A real blatant case of the kettle calling the pot black!"

The article went on for about a column in generalities equating anime/manga and hentay (sic) as one and the same and being nothing more than legalized child porn. It was obvious the American writer of the piece hadn't a clue as to what anime (Or, for that matter, hentai.) was about and had never gotten beyond the "Scooby Doo" stage in both knowledge or mentality about the subject.

On passing a news stand later in the day, Carls' curiosity made him step in.

"You gonna' pay for that bud? This ain't a lending library y'know."

"Huh? ... Oh!"

Carl unpocketed his wallet, giving the cashier the $2.50.

While not a fan of the New York Times (Now a shadow of its' former self.) he figured if anything was really newsworthy ("All the news that's fit to print", or gives them fits, after all.), it would be in the Times.

His relief of not seeing the story on the front page was VERY short lived on turning the page and finding it taking up just over half the space of the second.
Much more in depth than USA Todays', the Times article went into a detailed explanation not only how the story broke but on the anime/manga industry in general with brief explanations of the various facets thereof.

"Well," thought Carl, "at least they make a distinction between hentai and 'legit'."

Explanations of "fanfic" and other fan pastimes also displayed, Carl wincing on seeing photos of bad cosplay next to pics of angry Diet members haranguing in chambers.

A brief history of the past conflicts between U.S. military personnel and the local populaces of not only Okinawa but of bases in other parts of Japan was laid out.

Promises of planned protests later in the week ominously stated.

The presence of nuclear armed U.S. planes and ships based there also mentioned.

A later Times' Sunday edition in its' Arts and Leisure section would carry an extensive TWO AND A HALF page article addressing the various facets (Political, social, etc.) of the controversy and even more in depth detail of anime/manga and it's impact on the entertainment industry in general.

A later perusal of more newspapers at the local library that day was a waste of time though not anxiety. While the other papers had about the same non-depth of USA Today and thus the Times best informative, their printing the story at all at least told him the extent of the hornets nest he kicked.

Several of the articles (Times included.) mentioned that anyone at Otakufiction dot net could not be reached for comment.

To be continued ...

Storyline (only) copyright © 3-4-2016 C V Ford


1. Normally I'm definitely not one to push porn but credit where credit is due. Alfonso Lings' Haruhi-centric stories can be a fun read. Not the "wham, bam, thank you ma'am" crackfic stuff that frequents Fan Fiction dot net.

His best story in my opinion is the ten chapter "epic", The Movie Audition of Haruhi Suzumiya. Not as much a porno as it is a comedy/actioner. The vision of the sword wielding "nude avenger" can be ... inspiring. It's also one of his more "twisted" tales as you'll find in the latter chapters.

You'll never look at Haruhi quite the same way ... again.

2. The Chibi-usa (From Sailor Moon.) pornfic does exist out on the net somewhere. It's considered to be the worst pornfic ever done. No ... I'm not going to mention the title. It's that bad.

3. Super Chicken, a segment of Saturday mornings' animated series, George of the Jungle (Jay Ward Productions, 1967.).


The Porn Trolling of Haruhi Suzumiya Chapter: 1, 3, 4 Final Chapter.

Go to C V Fords' Anime Fan Fiction Page here.

Go to C V Fords' profile page and anime fan fiction stories list on Fan Fiction dot net here.

Go to Fan Fiction dot net here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this 'un means you're already there.

Disclaimer: The preceding is a NON-PROFIT work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only. I make no claim to ownership of the copyrighted names/characters, places, and events mentioned in this work. They are the sole properties of  their respective owners. Please, by all means support the owners of such properties in the purchase and enjoyment of their works.

Monday, March 21, 2016

Ted Cruz: Beware of the Born Again

Ted Cruz: Beware of the Born Again

I'm always quite leery of politicians who say they're "born again" and wear their salvation on their sleeves to garner votes. That was a lesson learned long ago.

Harken back to the 1976 presidential election, Carter vs Ford.

Across the country and in divinity school, the "rapture bunnies" were all atwitter over Jimmy Carter and his being "One of us!".

During this time the same "good Christians' at the bible college were giving me a hard time about my voting third party (Yeah, yeah ... Should have voted for Ford. Then again, the Republicans should've voted Reagan during primary season!). They of course doubted my salvation over a number of things (My skepticism about the phony rapture doctrine among other things.). The latest of which was my not jumping on the Jimmy Carter bandwagon with the rest of the independent thinkers.

I, of course, was doubtful about Mr. Carters' salvation. Not because I disagreed with his stance on things but because his theological beliefs were being used by the rank and file of believers as a political point in voting for him.

I believe a personal relationship with the Lord to be just that ... PERSONAL. Something between you and the Lord only. Yes, share the "message". Tell one and all about how and why Jesus did what he did. After all, ones' place in eternity stands on it. (1)

But it shouldn't be used to pander for political or monetary gain and used to puff oneself up before one and all. (Matthew 6:1-5 and 23:5-7)

In exasperated response to all the chiding and BS from my classmates, I told them they would regret their choice about a year down the road and they wouldn't want to talk to me about it.

Turned out I was right. They liked me even less after that and the whole country had a four year long lesson to learn.

My advice to voters who get taken in by the vocally pious is the same I give to young women:

Anyone who uses Jesus as part of his pick-up routine and come-on line IS A PATHETIC LOSER.


 Or ... In the words of the famous anti-Communist Herb Philbrick, when asked about Jimmy Carter:

"A born again turkey ... Is STILL ... a turkey."

Mitt Romney: A Cruz supporter and a man eminently qualified to speak anything about everything.

If I come across as harsh in regard to the above personalities, I do so only for emphasis. The future of our country is riding on this election and we can ill afford "business as usual" politics/policy.

Vote wisely.

1. The proceeding is what's known to believers as "the Roman road" as most of the verses are from the Book of Romans.

Romans 3:10-12 - 10) As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one: 11) There is none that understands, there is none that seeks after God. 12) They are all gone out of the way, they are altogether become unprofitable; there is none that does good., no, not one.

Psalms 14:3 - They are all gone aside, they are altogether become filthy: there is none that does good, no, not one.

Romans 3:23 - For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God;

No one is blameless. If you have trouble wrapping your mind around this, think of it as you would an illness or physical condition. It is a state which we are born under.

Romans 5:12 - Wherefore , as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:

The how and why we are that way. Adam is the reason we're under the weight of sin and trapped in this deadly cycle of entropy, decay and death.
Romans 5:8 - But God commends his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

Romans 6:23 - For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Jesus is the way out. The other side of the equation. With our acknowledgement of our sinbound state we can go on to have the Lord correct that.

Romans 10:13 - For whosover shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.

Romans 10:9-10 - 9) That if you shall confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and shall believe in your heart that God has raised him from the dead, you shall be saved. 10) For with the heart man believes to righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made to salvation.

This is the how in regard to Jesus. Do these and the cycle has no spiritual claim on you.

Revelation 3:20 - Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.

Jesus is waiting for you to answer. He has been there all along knocking. It could be you just didn't (Or didn't want to.) hear it.

John 3:16 - For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

Of course, it goes without saying, "Go and sin no more". I really stink at this. However, one should always keep going back and asking the Lord for guidance and strength to resist (It's called prayer.).

This is what's known as repentance, an active turning away from giving in to ones' baser instincts and it's an ongoing thing.

For guidance I strongly suggest one get in touch with a strong bible believing pastor/church in your area.

For a more in depth explanation, please read chapters 12, 13 and 14 of my Angel Beats fan fiction story, In Gods' Good Time.

Donald Trump for President web site here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

Thursday, March 17, 2016

Hilary ARFS Again!

Hillary ARFS Again!

Mr. Trump put out a new campaign ad ... Check it out!

My ... Precioussssss ...

And now a word from the morally annointed: "Be bop a loola
man! Be bop a loo! Be bop a loola man! Boogedy boogedy shoo!

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

Saturday, March 12, 2016

The Best Advertising Donald Trump Ever Had


The Best Advertising Donald Trump Ever Had

As you probably know by now, a few short hours ago as of this writing, a hoard of the "peace, love and brotherhood" crowd descended on a Donald Trump rally in Chicago and "expressed" themselves in the manner of the fascists they accuse everyone else of being.

The rally was called off, no doubt causing exaltation among the approximately ten grand disciples of tolerance and justice. They probably think they have won a victory of some kind.


This has to be the best advertising Donald Trump has ever had ... And he didn't even have to spend a cent on it.

It has now been demonstrated beyond a shadow of a doubt that:

The left and it's parasitic constituencies absolutely HATE Donald Trump.

The something for nothing crowd hates him.

The minority racists hate him.

The Muslims hate him.

The illegal (And some legal.) aliens hate him.

The collegiate left hates him.

Welfare sponges and other oxygen thieves hate him.

The list could go on for days.

Mr. Trump must be doing something right.

Face it, the above listed "wretched refuse" actually believe "the great Wal-Mart to the north" would be closed and the free ride to be over if Mr. Trump is elected president.

Do you ever hear of such hatred directed at Cruz, Kasich or Rubio? Didn't think so.

This has only served to solidify my decision for this buckeye to vote FOR Mr. Trump this Tuesday.

It may have made up the minds of many who were undecided.

You now know who to vote for ...


Donald Trump for President web site here.

Go to Ex-Army website (Where I got the above illustrations.) here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. If there's articles under this 'un then yer already there!

Tuesday, March 8, 2016

Rance Priebus and the Republican National Committee Want Your Support!

Rance Priebus and the Republican National Committee Want Your Support!

Received an e-mail from ole' Rance and the RNC this morning and it went like this:


Yesterday, I asked my staff to send me the membership records for the RNC’s most loyal members.

Not necessarily the biggest givers, but rather the most loyal, reliable, dedicated members - people I can count on to make a critical donation when it really makes a difference.

Jay, I couldn’t believe it when they told me you weren’t on the list.

Take a look for yourself:


Jay Agan

Member Since: NOT A MEMBER

2016 campaign cycle gifts: $0

Today I am hoping you will play a leadership role in the 2016 elections by making a special leadership contribution of $ 35, $50, $75 or even $100.

Your immediate gift will make a huge difference in our fight to take back the White House.

So no matter how much you can afford to give, please be generous.

Thank you in advance for your dedication and for your support.


Reince Priebus
Chairman, RNC

P.S. It’s critically important for you join our campaign in the upcoming election. Please make a leadership contribution to the RNC today. Thank you and God bless.

My reply:


Y'all readers of this blog have a nice day.

Go to Donald Trump website here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this 'un means you're there already.

Thursday, March 3, 2016

The Porn Trolling of Haruhi Suzumiya: Chapter One of a Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction Story

DISCLAIMER: The following story is a work of fan fiction created for the purposes of entertainment only and not to be construed as a statement of/by or necessarily a reflection of or on the views, opinions and methods of the staff and management of Fan Fiction dot Net, 4chan, any other entities/individuals mentioned or their affiliates. Any actual similarities are purely coincidental.


The Porn Trolling of Haruhi Suzumiya: Chapter One of a Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction Story


C V Ford


Chapter 1: The Fan and the Plan

Carl read the finished work for the umpteenth time ... and visibly shuddered ... for the umpteenth time.

His work was an anime pornfic. Not that he cared for porn. It certainly wasn't his forte'. No, he wrote it for different reasons. Not to titillate or appeal to the baser instincts though that was part of the means, but to tweak some noses and yank some chains.

This was going to be a pranking experiment. To see how many and how diverse a group of folks he could offend.

His targets were:

"Moralists", both left and right of all stripes - He hoped to raise the ire of racists/anti-racists, feminists, so-called Christians, self proclaimed PC police, social justice stormtroopers ... er ... warriors, ecumenicals, fundamentalists, conservatives, liberals, tolerance nazis, and anyone else of the "freedom for me but not for thee" crowd(s).

Other pornfic writers - These folks would be a "gauge" of sorts. If he could shake THEM up a little, then he knew he was on the right track.

This meant he had to write the most repulsive, sick and demented story he could come up with. It would have to offend the sensibilities of the most depraved and the most self righteous at the same time.

In short, the literary equivalent of having breath bad enough to knock a buzzard off a gut wagon ... at thirty paces ... DEAD!

The story was to consist of detailed explicitness in the most gross and effluvial manner as possible along with scatological imagery. And to be written with as high a literary standard he could muster.

In his weak moments, he had read enough porn over the years (Way back when a lot of porn novels actually had a plot!). Some was well written. A LOT was beyond crude and so badly done as to be next to unreadable and in some cases, laughable. Having written some himself for his own amusement, he was convinced that, had he tried, he could have made some serious dough in that field. It was evident (To him anyway.) he was a better writer than what a lot of the "professionals" passed themselves off as.

He even toyed with the idea of collecting as many old, trashy porn novels he could find, rewrite one per month and submit to publishers as his own work.

Rework the plots a little, change the title and character names, rewrite to a better standard ... No one would notice the plagerism and, he was sure, a steady stream of income.

As for his prank ...

As it was an anime fanfic, he chose his venue well.

An effective way, to him, in measuring the popularity of an anime was to go to Goggle Images and: (Name of anime.)/hentai/ENTER.

The "top" three franchises as far as his "research" was concerned were:

Sailor Moon

Neon Genesis Evangelion

The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya

Though he had some fun back in the '90s picking apart Sailor Moon in its' initial U.S. run on Fox Kids' weekday time slots (Hey kid! Those long transformations and histrionics could get you killed in the real world!), he still wasn't familiar enough with it to try fanfic. That and the fact it was such a dumb show to begin with, the same dang plot every episode. It was as bad as the old Scooby Doo series in that regard.

The artwork wasn't all that great either. The character designs themselves were the shows' only real good point as far as he was concerned. In the hands of better artists the characters became a hentai staple for over twenty years running.

He loved Neon Genesis Evangelion. As a former divinity student, the theological "hook" had him intrigued. OK, so the female characters were a distraction as well ... Ahem!

The problem with the characters of Misato, Asuka, Rei, Mari and the others was that they were "flawed". Because of their emotional/psychological issues, they didn't come across as "Americas'(?) sweethearts" or "the girl next door" types.

He wanted a franchise with a more happy/positive veneer. Scratch Evangelion.

The third choice was ideal. While he loved Evangelion, he absolutely ADORED Haruhi ... The series that is. About a girl who was (Unknowingly!) ... GOD!

Say WHAT!?

Back during its' first run in Japan in '06, he was lurking on Quadchan dot org in the Anime and Manga section when he ran across a thread headed with a "group shot" of the shows' main characters.

"Hello Wanda," talking to himself. "What're you doing in cartoons?"

The title character bore a superficial resemblance to a fondly remembered girlfriend from waaaaay back. Same length/color hair, round face, body type ...

"Getting a little creepy there, Carl," he thought as he went his merry way. "As the saying goes, 'she's a cartoon, not your waifu'."

It also didn't help that the Mikuru character looked a lot like Traci Lords (1).

He originally had no intention of getting any of those high school comedy/"slice of life" anime. His then goal in the previous decade was to round out his video collection with anime films and shows of the sci-fi, action, and military sub genres. Underage female characters were not his thing nor was Japans' scholastically mandated fetish outfit (Sera fuku!). He had more than a gut full of that while educated in Catholic schools and was rather picky about his women being real and of legal age to begin with.

A couple weeks after, he was again at that image board when he stumbled across another Haruhi thread wherein a question was raised:

"Let me get this straight. She's ... God, right?"

Oh ... Really?

A further reading revealed the character MIGHT be God or at least coming close to omnipotent.

"Hmm ... A bossy, hyperactive, capricious high school girl is unknowingly God. And it's up to her friends to make sure she never finds out or the universe gets tanked. Interesting."

Slightly intrigued a little more, Carl catologued it in the back of his mind and pushed on.

A couple months later, he bought a copy of Anime Rough Guide and fell across a more concise blurb about the show and decided to buy it if he ever got around to it.

Two weeks after, it got around to him.

At a central Ohio video game store (They actually had some old Mexican made horror films from the '50s and '60s!) his eyes espied a used copy of the first disc (four episodes) of the series. Snapping it up at $9.95+tax, he took it home and watched.

He was hooked.

The next several years ended with his possession of both seasons, the two "chan" series and Disappearance. Like most fans, he was unhappy over Kyoanis' discontinuance of the series. Unlike most fans, he actually liked Endless Eight ... Providing he took it in two episode "bites". His recently being informed (By a pornfic writer no less!) of the series "continuance", The Disappearance of Nagato Yuki-chan, had him ecstatic.

Some time after the initial purchase, Carl took to making a blog, carlsteevee dot com. There, he posted articles and musings about his favorite cartoons, anime and old movies. Quite a few of the articles were on his now favorite anime franchise, some playing along with the "joke" about the title character possibly being God.

He also took up writing fan fiction of various anime in the hopes it would make good practice for writing professionally one day. Several of them were based on The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. These he also posted on his blog. About a year after, when his confidence in his ability built up, he started putting his work on Otakufiction dot net.

He now had over forty stories posted and still going strong. A lot of "follows" and reviews, mostly favorable. Looking for "more worlds to conquer", a thought hit him and began to germinate in his mind.

He had always been something of a practical joker and was continually coming up with stuff to pull on others, mostly of the individual and small scale.

Why not a larger scale "hoax" of some kind? Something to stir up controversy, provoking thought and confusion. With him in the middle of it pulling strings and manipulating one and all. One to raise the emotions and ire while playing on their lusts and weaknesses thus making fools of many.

All in good fun of course (Insert sinister laughter and "bwa ha has'" here.).

With Otakufiction dot net, he had a ready made "forum" capable of reaching many people. And he set about making just the bait to draw them in.

It took him just over two weeks preparing that bait. About five days of initial writing in his spare time, the rest rounded out with editing. Hmmm ... Change a word here ... Move/rewrite that sentence there ... Add a word/sentence ... yeah ... This sentence/paragraph would be better there than here ... and on and on.

The piece involved Haruhi, Yuki, Mikuru, Tsuruya and Ryoko in a group sex situation with a horde of American servicemen while on a school field trip to Okinawa. He was NOT going to include Little Sister. Pre-teen lolicon gave him the crawling creeps beyond measure. No, he didn't think he could stomach going in that direction.

The title of the piece was aIRtight. Title in small case with IR in caps. IR for interracial, "airtight" in reference to a rather "interesting" group sex practice. (2)

Putting as much of his imagination into it as he could, in the end he was "satisfied" with the result ... That is, if you could call satisfied being so bummed out as to question your eternal destiny.

Carl never thought he could go as low and as far as he did ... and in such a high quality, literary manner as well. Keeping the four letter words at absolute minimum while being so explicit, descriptive, proseful ... and ... gross.

"Yes," he thought. "This really is a broken world ... And I'm the most broken of all."

Partly in disgust of himself and the world in general, he shelved it, going on to other projects and keeping the story far from his mind as possible.

Which was IM-POSSIBLE.

What has been written cannot be unwritten and the piece continually preyed upon his mind.

He wanted to forget it ... couldn't.


Finally giving in to the urge to throw out bait and see who/what bites, he implemented ...


He had already set up two "dummy" accounts at Otakufiction dot net from two different locations some weeks before. One, under the pen name of SixSick6 to post the story, and another to give a favorable bogus review ... Priming the pump so to speak.

"Let's see ... settings ... "

All were set on NO. No indication of what country the account was from. No guest review moderation or profanity filtration.

And no acceptance of Private Messaging. All flaming was to be right out there in the open for the world to see.

"No means of discerning location or direct contact," cautioning himself. "Let 'em all think it's a commie plot or something."

He chuckled to himself on reflecting his time as a young man during the pre-'90s cold war and the Reagan administration.

Though what he was about to do wasn't illegal, he felt the extra layers of security would keep him from direct harassment or having his "legit" account closed down. The story would be a definite MA rating, above the M (mature) restriction set by the web site. He estimated the story would be pulled by the moderators one week, two tops. Time enough to cause what he hoped would be an uproar and maybe give cause for a flame war or two by the indignant.

The story of course was written in a style unlike his usual. Also, instead of posting with title, by and author at the top, he just entered the story "as is" like so many others did on the site.

It was on a return trip from a biweekly visit to the folks he made his move. He always "made a day of it" on these trips, stopping at "bargain basements", thrift shops and used book stores in his quest for books, movies and shows he liked. A few more stops on the way home were no problem.

Now, at a computer in a library in another town, he posted the story.

Accessing the SixSick6 account, he entered the story in doc then "filled out" the New Story section in preparation for entry. The summary blurb read:

Haruhi and the other babes in group sex with U.S. servicemen while on a field trip to Okinawa. Rated quadruple M for gratuitous racism, gooey messiness, scatological imagery and absolute lack of safety. Don't like, don't read. Knowing the way some of you are, even if you don't like it, you're gonna' read it anyway ... more than once.

"That oughta' bring 'em running," he said to himself.

He clicked the 'publish' button.

"Forgive me Haruhi, for I know EXACTLY what I do."

To be continued ...

Story (Excepting mentioned anime characters.) copyright © 3-3-2016 C V Ford


1. Traci Lords was a famous porn "actress" in the early '80s noted for her cheer leader, "girl next door" looks and "enthusiasm". Her "fame" really went through the roof when it was found she was underage, resulting in one of the more interesting court cases of the latter years of the twentieth century.

I can only wonder if Noizi Ito, the character designer for The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, had Ms. Lords in mind when she came up with the appearance of the Mikuru character.

2. For those of you who may be wondering if I actually wrote the pornfic itself, the answer is ... yes. NO, I'm not going to post it. In fact, I deleted it. Washed my hands. Took a shower ... and washed my hands again.

Sometimes I scare myself ... really.


The Porntrolling of Haruhi Suzumiya chapters 2, 3, 4 Final Chapter.

Go to C V Fords' Anime Fan Fiction Page here.

Go to C V Fords' profile page and anime fan fiction stories list at fanfiction dot net here.

Go to Jays Tee Vee blog main page here. Any other articles under this 'un means yer already there.

Disclaimer: The preceding is a NON-PROFIT work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only. I make no claim to ownership of the names/characters, places, and events mentioned in this work that are copyrighted by others. They are the sole properties of their respective owners. Please, by all means support the owners of such properties in the purchase and enjoyment of their works.

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Gate: An Anime Review With Reservations

L-R: Tuka Luna Marceau, Youji Itami, Lelei La Lelena and Rory Mercury.

Gate: An Anime Review With Reservations

Caught wind of this on You Tube and decided to give it a go on Crunchityroll. And ... well ... some good ... some ... "bad".

First ... the plot:

A portal or gate (Hence the title.) materializes in the Shinjuku area of Tokyo. Out pours a midieval/Roman style fantasy army complete with goblins, freaks and flying dragons that attacks the people in the streets. The JSDF is called in, the police rally and the invaders are destroyed, the remainder either driven back beyond the gate or captured.

The Japanese government sends an expeditionary force to the now designated Special Region to retaliate and check things out for possible exploitation.

The show itself is about the (mis)adventures of Youji Itami and his unit in the Special Region. A slacker, otaku, and JSDF member (Who was off duty that day for a doujinshi convention.) who "Forrest Gumped" his way through the ranks.

Due to his fast thinking on that day drawing some blood and saving countless lives, he is promoted to 2nd Lieutenant and assigned to a recon team. The purpose of the team is of course recon but also "hearts and minds" with the locals.

Thus two seasons worth of "culture shock" on the part of both sides.

The pluses:

NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT ... EXECRABLE ... STEINS' GATE. Which was a convoluted mess with a LOUD annoying jerk as lead character.

I don't usually go in for fantasy shows. The "magic" ends up as an overused plot device and degenerates into a sentai fighting show like Dragonball Z or Fullmetal Alchemist. So far it's been kept to a minimum. As this is also "sticks and stones" vs. modern military with magic taking a distant back seat, I rather liked it.

The one mage gets a basic chemistry book and uses the knowledge gained in supplementing her sorcery. A nice touch. She also buys a laptop and related software while on a diplomatic trip to Tokyo as an aid to her research.

The minuses:

The seemingly out of place goth lolita demi-goddess Rory Mercury character comes across like some "deus ex machina". Invincible "Mary Sue" types I find uninteresting.

Some of the action scenes, particularly the ones with Rory Mercury, are choppily edited. No sooner an image barely registers, it switches to another. Makes for an exercise in eyestrain, motion sickness and aggravation. So far this hasn't been done too much

This is, to me, one of those "Japan vs. the west" kind of shows. Sorta' kinda' like The Silent Service, Zipang or Starship Operators. This should come as no surprise as the original mangas' creator is a right winger.

The chief bad guys appear as blond and overbearing (Including the U.S. President. Donald Trump anyone?). Other blondes as cute and at times, ditzy (ex.: Tuka the elf babe.).

Cute critters show up (Cat girls, bunny babes, etc.). In a later episode so does a Tinkerbelle-like fairy (Thankfully for only a moment.). So far as I've seen, the cute isn't laid on too thick. The doujinshi goes slightly more in depth in passing about the empire discriminating against the elves, animal people and goblins. Yeah ... I give a pass on the pointy eared folk and cat babes, but goblins? ... No way! Yeah ... I discriminate ... And don't feel guilty at all about it.

It should be noted that Japan is, in spite of the assimilation of western tech and concepts/ideas, still a quite insular and institutionally racist country. Nothing wrong in that. After all ... It's what keeps Japan ... well ... Japan.

The infatuation and "marriage proposal" of an UNDERAGE princess with Japans' ambassador comes across as blatantly creepy. The ambassador, to his credit, thinks the better of it and the age of consent laws in Japan are cited. In spite of what any of you hentai fans who might be reading this may believe, age of consent laws over in Japan are brutally strict and woe to those caught indulging who shouldn't.

The emperors' daughter and her entourage, on a visit to Tokyo for negotiations become infatuated with fag comics, mistaking that mistake for high art. Yaoi ... Isn't that the sound they make when they ... never mind.

The U.S., Russia and China get involved hoping to one day gain access to the Special Region thus assassination attempts, blackmail and intrigue resulting.

As much as I like the shows' original premise of "sticks 'n stones" vs modern age, the imagery of an Asian army pushing around what appears to be a European culture doesn't sit well with me. Especially since that Asian military is using weapons that, for the most part, were designed and made by European people. It is a fantasy many Japanese have harbored (And even tried to fulfill from 1905 to 1945.) since Perry surprised them in 1853. Gate could be viewed as a "Perry in reverse".

As an aside, I see nothing wrong in Japan doubling the size of their present military AND PAYING FOR IT THEMSELVES. The Second World War has long been over. While Japan (And South Korea for that matter.) is part of the Chinese/Confucian "nexus", the hostility of one for the other, at present, keeps "blood calling to blood" in check. Anything short of nukes and Eva units I'm all for them having. :)


Am reading the manga online at and have every intention of buying the discs when Sentai Filmworks sells it here.

All the same, I'll be watching/enjoying it somewhat "tongue in brain" so to speak.

Relax Itami! At 900+ she's of legal age. All the same ... RUN!

Go to Crunchyroll streaming anime here.

Go to episode One of Gate at Crunchyroll here.

Wikipedia article on the Gate franchise here.

Interesting little article about Gate and Japanese history, military and otherwise here.

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles after this 'un, with or without cutesy crap, means you're already there!