Some Non-Theories About When The Lord Will Return

Credit: Sojin

Some Non-Theories About When The Lord Will Return


More like nonsense theories. Shoot, the cockeyed armageddon fantasies the rapture bunnies espouse can be pretty ridiculous. So I'll just list three of my ideas for when JUDGEMENT DAY arrives.

1. Faster than light drive - It is my "theory" (dementia) that Heaven, hell and the universe (The "level" we're on.) are one and the same. We're "resonating" too slow to perceive the universe as Heaven and too slow to experience it as hell (Or Cleveland.).

Once a faster than light drive is developed, God will bring down the curtain and give us our respective verdicts. After all, I doubt He'd enjoy tripping over all those spaceships in Heaven.

2. The Infinite Improbability Drive - A variation on the above that I'd been inspired from watching The Hitch Hikers' Guide to the Galaxy (Book by Douglas Adams.) an '80s English sci-fi miniseries (Not to be confused with the much later movie of the same name.).

According to the book/series, the Infinite Improbability Drive would enable one to travel through or for that matter, be in all points of the universe at once. I don't think God would stand for that. There's room for only one transcendent being in the universe and he's it. Hence, Judgement Day to commence.

3. A "world brain" - This occurred to me from watching the anime Serial Experiments Lain, a real mind bender of a show. The program is a master mix of urban legends, theology, conspiracy theories and other "curious" stuff.

In one episode, collective human consciousness is discussed. Something interesting might happen if enough "compliant" minds on the planet equaled the average number of synapses in the human brain. Could a "world mind/brain" result?

In the "Tower of Babel" story found in the bibles' Book of Genesis (Chapt. 11, verses 4-9.), God confused all of then mankind in their speech making so they could not understand one another. The now various peoples banded together in their respective language groups and separated one from another.

This was done to prevent mankind from going "too far, too fast".

If enough souls could become "compliant" (Be it ideology, mental conditioning, "Mark of the Beast" or whatever.) would that overcome the language barrier thus getting around the "limits" set by God and create another "Babel situation"? It's interesting that the LaHaye/Jenkins Left Behind series of books had its' own "bablefish" set up for Christians of diverse languages to speak directly with one another.

Truly a reason for Christs' return.

The above is NOT to be taken seriously. Just some ramblings off the top 'o my head. This is what comes from too much time on ones' hands. So are some Hal Lindseys' and Tim LaHayes' whackness for that matter.

Jus' sayin' ...


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. You don't have to click on this link or use any faster than light or Inifinite Improbability Drive if you see articles under this. It means you're already there.