Showing posts with label Classic Horror Film Board. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Classic Horror Film Board. Show all posts

Monday, May 19, 2014

The New Godzilla? Forget It!

WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!

The New Godzilla? Forget It!

Guess I won't be seeing the new Godzilla flick after all. Looked at a thread on the Classic Horror Film Board and that was warning enough. I go to CHFB as I find what those "monsterkids" say to be  more reliable than say, some reviewer who goes on and on about the stuff he reads into a movie while at the same time really says nothing about the film itself.

Complaints about the films' unevenness, plot holes, cut aways and defects abounded. Those could be debated and were but the main thing that dissuaded me from going was it being stated that there isn't enough of the title "character" in the film ...

Maybe 7 to 8 minutes worth.

Only about 7 or 8 minutes of "face time" ... in a 123 minute movie? Oh c'mon! If that's the case then forget it.

After ALL those months of hype, only a few minutes of the big guy?

What did the ads say?

GODZILLA!

What did the posters say?

GODZILLA!

What did Gareth Edwards say?

GODZILLA!

What did Warners and Legendary Pictures say?

GODZILLA!

WHAT DID THE HYPE(!) WITH A CAPITAL HYPE(!) SAY!?

GOD - FREAKIN' - ZILLAAAAAAAA BABY!!!!!!

What does the actual flick have?

... godzilla ...

Lotsa' sizzle with only a bite of steak at the end of the line.

Naw! I'm saving my dough.

Just Sayin' ...

The Godzilla I know and loathe.

Classic Horror Film Board Godzilla 2014 thread here.

Classic Horror Film Board main page here.

Wikipedia article on the 2014 Godzilla flick here.

Wikipedia article on the original 1954 Godzilla film here.

Armands' Rancho del Cielo blog here. If you want lotsa' things Godzilla, this is the place!


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. If there's a buncha' articles under this 'un, yer already there.

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Mr. Trololo: Gone But NEVER To Be Forgotten



                                 Mr. Trololo: Gone But NEVER To Be Forgotten


      I got "turned on" to this meme only a few short months ago while watching The Freakingness of Haruhi Suzumiya anime parody videos (Part 1, Part 2) on You Tube. For those of you who bother (Or are bothered.) to read this blog, you know I'm something of an anime fan. One blurb in the second part (About 11 minutes of the way in.) used a part of the "Trololo" song. Curious, I sat through the credits & entered "trololo" in the You Tube search field & came up with this.

      Needless to say, I was intrigued. How something so "awful" could be so popular ... I mean this was an awesome weapon of the Cold War & could have spelled the end of the free world. For some strange reason (Divine intervention?), the Soviets decided to turn it on themselves & rely on Jimmy Carter to give the store away to them. Bad move (For them.). Thank GOD for Ronald Reagan!

      Kidding aside, this is an excellent example of one being behind & ahead of his time. Mr. "Trololo" Khil will be missed, but he has achieved an immortality of sorts. The world isn't going to forget him for quite a loooong while.

The "I Am Very Glad Because I'm Finally Back Home" album cover.


Trololo original here.

Long thread on the Classic Horror Film Board here. Lotsa links n' videos.

Ria Novosti obit article here.

Mr. Trololo on Family Guy here.

Hitler Calls the Trololo Guy here.

The Freakingness of Haruhi Suzumiya Part 1, Part 2.

Go to Main Page here.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Goodbye Kim Jong il

Photo taken of Kim Jong Il a few days before his demise. A wooden actor if there ever was one.

      Good bye to a fellow movie buff. About the only good thing I can say about him.

      God help & bless the PEOPLE of Korea, north & south. They're going to need it.

What the gang at the Classic Horror Film Board are saying about it here.

Go to Main Page here.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Another Wot Coulda Been Anime

George Barrows as the beast of Revelation strikes
in Robot Monster. 1953 Photo credit: Astor Pictures

                                         Another Wot Coulda Been Anime

                                                                 by

                                                                     Jay Agan

     The last family on Earth fights a desperate struggle for survival against an alien "horde" composed of a single invader. Hilarity ensues when the Ro-Man turns out to be George Barrows wearing a gorilla suit & space helmet! Name of the film: Robot Monster! A Phil Tucker masterpiece guaranteed to bring on the laughs. The reviews it got back in 1953 alledgedly drove Tucker to attempt suicide. Just watching it may get you to thinking the same. Fer instance:

     Familiar stock footage from One Million BC, Flight to Mars & other oldies to pad it out.

     An epic "battle" scene straight out of DBZ (Just kidding!), where the heroine is obviously giggling over her perilous predicament.

     Atrocious philosiphizing about how "must" & "cannot" be existentially reconciled. Think of all the screwy pop philosophy/dialogue that comes up in so many anime. ("People die when they get killed." How profound!)

     A "near rape" scene that has you going ..... "What the ..... ?"

     Special effects consisting of flashes (Uh, oh ..... "The Pokemon Effect"!), electrical buzzes, negative exposure photography, & lots & lots of ..... BUBBLES!

     Maybe they could have the Sailor Moon & Dragonball folks collaborate on this one.

     Most critics & discriminating viewers were really down on this one when it was released. While the incredible cheesiness & under the top quality are more than obvious, I cannot help but wonder (Spoiler ahead!): It turns out in the end it was only a kids' fever dream. A fellow on the Classic Horror Film board once remarked about this film on how the "production values" of a lot of his dreams/nightmares were pretty sparse. Same for me. It could be the ultra schlockiness of this flick was intentional & nobody got the "joke". Instead it's on us.

     By the way. The composer of the "opressive" music for this film is Elmer Bernstein. I find it hard to believe this is the same guy who wrote the compositions for DeMilles' The Ten Commandments. If so, a classic case of "from the depths to the heights."

     "You can not escape me ..... Hu-man! ..... Very well ..... I will recalculate ..... Your death will be In-De-Scri-BABLE! Fool ..... hu-mans! There is no escape!"

Robot Monster trailer & commentary here.

Hell & High Water: A Movie Wot Coulda Been Anime here.

Go to Main Page here.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

This article (only) may be copied (With permission.) in whole or in part. Please include proper credit and backlink.

                                           
                                                Article copyright © 2-3-2011 Jay Agan

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Cinematic Heresy Part 3: Gone With the Wind

The BEST part of this mess.
Credit: MGM
                                                           
                                Cinematic Heresy Part 3: Gone With the Wind

                                                                by

                                                                   Jay Agan

      I've never seen this picture all the way through. I can't rightly say I've even seen it part way through. I tried. Really ..... really, .....tried. I just can't get myself to sit through this ultra over-rated cinematic mistake:

                                                 GONE WITH THE WIND

      My last attempt to view it resulted as before. Disaster.

      Opening credits, no problem. Anyone can get through them. Then ..... bad things begin to happen.

      We're on a pavillion or porch. With this woman. This TALKING woman. Talking .... talking ..... in that ..... voice. Talking ..... in that ..... horrible ..... irritating ..... voice. Talking. Did I say she was talking? Oh yes! Talking.

      Will we ever get off that porch?

      Will she ever stop talking?

      And who the heck is this Ashley Wilkes guy & why should I care?

      I got off the porch ..... running ..... running.

      Actually I flipped channels for something more intellectually stimulating such as NASCAR or pro-wrestling.



Now THIS I'd LOVE to see!

      It must be a masochistic streak in me for I kept returning to TCM in hopes of the situation improving.

      Well. We're off the porch. She's stiiiiiill talking though.

      One hour+ later. Still yakking away. In a ballroom. C'mon Clark! Make her shut up!

      Even later. Atlanta in flames but she has quieted down a bit. What a weird chick. I guess "it takes a burning village".

      As one fellow (In a related thread in the Off Topic Discussions section on The Classic Horror Film Board.) wrote: "Am I the only one rooting for the Union Army?" No. No your not!

      As God is my witness! I will never try to see this movie again! (Que music)

                                                     Article copyright © Jay Agan
Go to Main Page.

DISCLAIMER: All images used on this blog are strictly copyrights of their owners. I do not claim credit/ownership for any images used here in my blog unless stated otherwise. If I have offended anyone by posting any images on my blog, please contact me via email and I will remove specified image(s) ASAP.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Leslie Nielsen

Leslie Nielsen & Anne Francis in Forbidden Planet (MGM 1956)
Photo credit: MGM Studios


                                                               IN MEMORIUM

                                                             LESLIE NIELSEN

                                                                   1926-2010

                                                He made me laugh more than once.


                          Ongoing thread at the Classic Horror Film Board here: CHFB.

Go to Main Page.