Tuesday, December 27, 2016

ALL HAIL TRUMPUS MAXIMUS!



ALL HAIL TRUMPUS MAXIMUS!


Saw a couple quibcags (quote introduced by cute anime girl) on the Ex-Army blog 'n thought I'd add my two cents.

Of course we know how the presidential election itself went and the above "cag" pretty much says it all. The hive mind that calls itself the Democratic Party and has a jackasshole as it's symbol, worked very hard to get that haridan elected.

For the last eight years, it had been building up to what they thought was a sure thing.

You may recall it starting out as "eight years Obama, eight years Hillary" (These jerks were so DAMN confident the second four would go to her as well!). Then it was "I'm ready for Hillary!" They had all but crowned that she-orc as the Empress of the Universe.

There was NO WAY she could lose. We might as well have just skipped the election and made it official by coronating her.

Why?

Because the pundits SAID SO, that's why!

Happy for us all, what they thought to be the joker in the deck turned out not to be a jack but the ace of diamonds.


I laughed my posterior off over this one!

As I'm a Lovecraft fan and actually work at a university (There's all these safe space/zone, rainbow crap stickers/signs all over the place.), I thought I'd throw in the above quibcag as well.

This is my last blog post for this year. Hope you had a GREAT Christmas. I know I did. The election was more than just "gravy on the rice".

Have a safe, happy and prosperous new year ...


The strange place from where I copped the above graphics here.

A couple of my Star Trek articles here 'n here.

Some of my Lovecraft movie reviews here, here and ... here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Yer already there if you espy articles beneath this 'un h'yar.

Thursday, December 15, 2016

Previews of "Coming Attractions"

A Haruhi riff on Neon Genesis Evangelion.


Previews of "Coming Attractions"


As what some of the few followers of this blog know, I write anime fan fiction under the nom-de-plumage of C V Ford. Due to sweating out this last presidential ... precedential election (All hail Trumpus Maximus!), I've written very, VERY little as I was in no mood while waiting for the world to "end" or finding (Happily so!) that we'd get at least a four year respite/reprieve.

Now that Socialism is going to be held at arms length a little while longer, I'm going to get back into the swing of things and start writing again in January.

Here's some "trailers" for yas'. Titles subject to change.

The Major(s') Assignment of Haruhi Suzumiya - A Ghost In the Shell/Haruhi crossover wherein Major Kusunagi travels back in time in order to solve the mystery as to why Section 23 can't go farther back than 2003. Though the prosthetic body she's using appears to be an upper end model from that "club" she frequents it's actually a full race military model. Its capabilities? (She cocks head sideways, index on cheek, cute little smile.) "That's classified."

Unbottled Genie - A fanfic for Gate: Thus the Defense Force Fought. Not all captives taken in the "Ginza Incident" were Japanese or have been accounted for. Some have "disappeared" into the Special Region. A study of the effects of modern technology on a less sophisticated culture.

Once Upon a Time In the Modern West - Another Gate fic. Not your typical "Ginza Incident" riff. What if the "gate" materializes instead in a small town in the U.S. ? As everyone knows, Americans love their guns ... And that goes double for Texans!

Smarter Than You Think - A Neon Genesis Evangelion fic. Though she doesn't know that the interview with Dr. Akagi is about becoming an Eva pilot, Hikari Horaki has questions of her own having to do with just that.

The Pranking of Taniguchi - Another Haruhi story. It's Valentines Day and Kyon is aghast on seeing Taniguchi finding three boxes of candy in his shoe locker. Is the boasting of the self-proclaimed Romeo finally coming true?

There probably will be more. Hopefully to start posting in February.

Thats' it for now in regard to new stories. In the meantime, check out what I've already written! Have fun ...


Go to C V Fords' Anime Fan Fiction Page here.

Go to Fan Fiction Dot net here.

Go to C V Fords' profile page and anime fan fiction list here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. You're already there ifn' ya' sees articles under this 'un.

Friday, December 9, 2016

The Disappearance of Nagato Yuki-chan ... O' The Disappointment

Yuki feels your pane.

The Disappearance of Nagato Yuki-chan ... O' The Disappointment


Let's see ...

Kyon is pleasant and clueless.

Yuki is aggravatingly/annoyingly cute and helpless.

Haruhi is, as usual, a jerk ... but not in a fun way.

Ryoko is just annoyiing.

Tsuraya and Mikuru are along for the ride.

Itsuke is gay ...

Well at least there is one constant from the original.

I was originally ecstatic about this series ... until I watched it.

Except for the five episodes having to do with the aforesaid "disappearance", the other eleven episodes were a total waste of time. Nothing more than a typical high school romance anime complete with the mandatory (Japanese law requires such.) hot springs and beach episodes.

Yuki's in love with Kyon but is too shy/chicken to show it. Kyon is oblivious to her affections. Ryoko tries to get them together. Itsuke tries to get himself and Kyon together. Haruhi, Tsuraya and Mikuru are just there because they were in the original series and movie.

After nine "filler" episodes Yuki has a near accident and is mentally replaced (Hence the titles' "disappearance".) by "another" Yuki unlike herself who actually confesses to Kyon. Yuki later "comes back" to herself and reverts to the klutzy little mouse from the beginning.

Even though Kyon confesses to the "other" Yuki later, everything (Though she resolves to eventually express her feelings toward Kyon.) ends up with Yuki the same as before like the series never happened.

No real conclusion, no real ending.

Might as well as not have watched it.


Wikipedia article on the series here.


Go to Jay' Tee Vee blog main page here. You're already there if ya' sees articles under this 'un.

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Think About It

U.S.S. Arizona and Memorial at Pearl Harbor.

Think About It


No more need be said.


Wikipedia article on the Pearl Harbor attack here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles beneath this one indicate you're already there.

Sunday, December 4, 2016

Dear Leftists, Liberals, and Progressives




Cobbed this from Armands' Rancho Del Cielo blog who in turn:


The following was posted today by John Paul Straub at The Deplorables Facebook page:


Dear Leftists, Liberals, and Progressives,

You lost this election because you got up every day and loudly accused anyone who didn't agree with you of being a racist, misogynist, bigot, homophobic.

You lost because you did nothing but spew hate for 8 years while telling us yours was an ideology of love.

You lost because you stole from America via taxation while telling us that we were the greedy ones.

You lost because you dropped more bombs, killed more with drone strikes, and increased tensions with a nuclear superpower all while telling us that we were the war-mongers.

You lost because the cities that you controlled spiraled into poverty and crime all while you told us that our policies disenfranchised people.

You lost because you told us that gender is simply a social construct all while telling us that Hillary should be president because of her gender.

You lost because you support and take money from regimes that imprison or kill gays, subjugate women, and think that rape is a man's right all while telling us that we hate gays, are afraid of women, and promote a culture of rape.

You did not lose because we are racist. You did not lose because we are homophobic.

You did not lose because we are misogynists or bigots.

You lost because you are liars. You lost because you are hypocrites. You lost because you were not witty or clever enough to even hide those facts very well.

Sincerely,

The Rest of America




What I THINK is The Deplorables facebook addy here. If not, it oughta' be. Has some GREAT funny pro-Trump illustrations! Two of which I swiped for this article.

Armands' Rancho del Cielo, where I got wind of this article here. Mr. Vaquer is the unofficial U.S. Ambassador to Japan ... At least I think he is.

Here is probably the most iconic "snowflake meltdown" ever. She looks like a real killer tomato!

A very calm pro-Trump reaction to the election here ... NOT!


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. You're already there if you see other articles under this 'un.

Friday, December 2, 2016

School Days: A Real Time Saver!


Bland, generic "protagonist" Mokoto Ito goes from not so lovable doofus to
notorious womanizer to total useless a-hole in less than 12 episodes.


School Days: A Real Time Saver!


As Theodore Sturgeon said:

"90% of everything is crap."

Anime is no exception. And, in the case of anime, this is especially true because 90% of anime is of the high school sub-genre and its' many sub-sub-genres. A type I've never been too hot on.

There are exceptions of course. Mine are (Notice I wrote MINE. Your "exceptions" will be different.) The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, Azumanga Daioh and Angel Beats among others. For me to want to watch something it would have to  have some kind of "hook" in it that interests me and these shows have them (Theological, intelligent sci-fi, thought provoking, etc.).

As an aside(s), There are other kinds of anime I generally dislike but some shows of their kinds I do like. I hate giant robot shows but Evangelion and Gunbuster have their attractions for me. The "magical girl" krap I definitely not into but Puella Magi Madoka Magica with its' Evangelion-like plot(s) has me liking it.

As for the high school/schoolgirl crap ... well ...

The usual tropes, stereotypes, situations, lame laughs, bad drama ... The list goes on and on.

But wait!

There is one high school anime that I really do "like" ... In a semi-masochistic sort of way, School Days.

And I like it for the very same reasons I dislike most ALL the others of the same sub-genre.

WHAT!?

That's right. For the same reasons I don't like the others.

Huh?

Okay ... there are the usual aforementioned in School Days. The same plots, same characters, romances and other fixtures.

In one show.

That's right. You don't have to watch a bunch (A LOT!) of shows to attain a working knowledge of this sub-genre. They're all there. In-that-one-show.

Think of all the time and money you'll save by just buying/watching this alone.

School Days runs the whole gamut of the various comedy, drama/psycho-drama, horror, romance, mystery and whateverceteras all those shows have. In just less than the cost in time and money of one season alone (Twelve episodes), you will have seen ALL the high school anime ever made.

Just think ... When some fan of whatever of that type anime waxes loud and long about the latest "flavor of the month", you can easily give a knowing smirk and say you've seen it before.

"Been there ... Done that!"

Why should you care about the titles, production values, artwork, and the characters everyone has bonded too?

None of that matters. With School Days, you'll have literally seen them all!

Really ... School Days is more of a commentary and statement than it is a show.

Even the bland generic title of ... School Days ... should be something of a clue.

I'm getting to wonder if that's what the folks who made the show had in mind when they did it.

Could it be that all those reviewers and watchers of the show got it wrong? Did the bizarre, hard hitting finale (It's as if the producers were "killing" the genre as well as the show!) confuse them ?

Could it be that School Days is not only a statement but also a high kind of subtle satire and nobody "got it"?

Heck! I got it!

School Days ... The "Readers Digest" of anime!

Warning ... Shows' ending is not for the faint of heart.

Wikipedia article on the visual novel and show, School Days here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. You're already there ifn' ya' sees articles under this 'un. 

Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Is It Beginning To Look a Lot Like Christmas? ... YES! ... It Certainly Does!



Is It Beginning To Look a Lot Like Christmas? ... YES! ... It Certainly Does!


I about fell out of my chair when I first saw this! Yes it really is beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Mr. Castro said Trump would not be president in his lifetime. Boy, WAS HE EVER RIGHT!

In my efforts to try to get at least three entries in this blog per week, I thought I'd just cob this from Karol Travens' blog, Ex-Army. His specialty is/are "quibcags": Quote Introduced By Cute Anime Girl(s). In this case, the K-On! kids.

K-On! ... Hmmmm ... Tried watching that one ... Too cute ... Quit after the first episode ...

Well ... If I don't have to shovel snow at work for the rest of the year, or the rest of the winter for that matter (Just like last year!), 2016 will be complete.

SWEEEEEEEET!

Jus' sayin' ...


Mr. Travens' blog where I swiped the above graphic here.


My blogs' main page here. Any articles under this means you're already there and yas don't hafta' punch this link. SWEEEEEET!

Sunday, November 27, 2016

Ding Dong the (Son of a) Bitch Is Dead!

A Hallicrafters ad from the early '60s.


Ding Dong the (Son of a) Bitch Is Dead!


Not going to say much about this character except to say that I would have voted for him if he was running against Clinton and not Trump. The scumbag didn't pretend to be anything other than what he was.

I've a feeling Cuba's about to open up a lot more now. I suggest to any Cubans (Or any of their stateside relatives.) reading this to hold on to your older U.S. made cars. The island may be about to be flooded with car buffs and collectors more than happy to take that "junk" off your hands for cheap ...

AND I MEAN CHEEP!

Yes I spelled that "right". That's how "cheep" they might be.

Sure, most of those "Yank tanks" have a lot of the original parts replaced and those Russian made diesels powering a lot of them certainly don't raise their value. Howsomever, original '40s/'50s body panels, among other things, may command top prices and some of your rides would make for great restoration projects.

Hold out for top dollar, folks. Otherwise you may be without transportation for a long time.

Duuuuude! ... It's a Stude!

A couple of articles contrary here and here.

Herb Alperts' Tijuana Taxi here. Yeah, I know. "Mexican". Hey ... If put in Wars' Low Rider you'd REALLY get ticked off. Besides, old cars is old cars ... And I love 'em!

A Cuba related article of mine on Radio Havana and "numbers" stations from a few years ago here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this means yer already on it. MAKE OLD CARS GREAT AGAIN!

Sunday, November 20, 2016

WHAT TH-! ... SHE'S REAL!?



WHAT TH-! ... SHE'S REAL!?


Yeah, yeah. It's not really God ... er ... Haruhi Suzumiya. Only a very comely cosplayer.

This photo caught my eye and I thought I'd post. Not gonna' tell ya where I got it on the net. I've been a bad boy.

This is to announce that starting sometime in January, I'm going to put more effort into this blog and TRY to get back up to three articles per week. Even if it means posting "any little thing", I'll do it.

Now that the elections are over and EL DONALDO is to be our commander in chief (Libtards eat your miniscule hearts out!), I can relax a bit and concentrate on the original purpose of this blog: The promotion of anime, older movies and Haruhi-ism.

There will still be some political stuff (Screw you, libtards! ... And some of you so-called conservatives as well!) but I'll be more focused on my "hobby".

So ... 'til then ...

Yes ... Things DO go better with Coke!

Go to my three part The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya review from long ago  here, here and here.

My political Haruhi Suzumiya fanfic story, Mr. John Smith Goes to Washington here and here. MAKE ANIME GREAT AGAIN!

Go to C V Fords' Anime Fan Fiction Page! here.

Go to C V Fords' profile page and anime fanfiction list at Fan Fiction dot net here.

Fan Fiction dot net main page here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this, Mr. Trump or not, means you're already there. Thumbs up!

Friday, November 11, 2016

The Turning of the Screwed



The Turning of the Screwed


A few thoughts on last Tuesdays'/Wednesdays' miracle. Not all of them to be taken seriously.

In spite of:

Manipulated polls ...

Manipulated media ...

Hollywood ...

Irrelevant celebs threatening to leave ...

A chickenshit Republican political machine ...

Make believe tough guy Robert DiNiro being an asshole ...

Mitt Romney being an even bigger asshole ...

John Kasich being a pledge breaking, pancake sucking asshole ... Remove Kebab!

In spite of the above ...

Donald Trump will be President in January.

And socialism, for the moment, has been knocked on its ass. The New World Order (Or whatever they're calling that hodge podge of conspiracies this week.) has been given a set-back.

But ...

I don't mean to throw cold water on our celebretory spirit ... but ...

Don't get your hopes up too much.

Don't get me wrong. I'm as ecstatic as everyone else right now. Happier than a bakers' dozen of clams in fact.

Howsomever ...

Mr. Trump is only one man. He won't be able to wave a magic wand and fix things immediately or even in a hundred days. Fixing the damage of 8+ years will take some time.

He's going to run into opposition not only from the democrat machine but from some factions in the republican one as well.

I am optimistic though ...

xxxxx

Julian Assange and Wikileaks ... Thank you, thank you, thank you ... THANK YOU!

xxxxx

Some suggestions:

Newt Gingrich for Secretary of State.

Rudolph Giuliani for Attorney General.

Ben Carson for Surgeon General.

Reince Priebus for Chief of Staff.

Jeff Sessions for Secretary of Defense.

General Michael Flynn for National Security Advisor.

Steven Mnuchin for Secretary of the Treasury

Chris Christie for Secretary of Commerce.

Kellyanne Conway for White House Press Secretary.

Melania Trump for Keeping America Beautiful.

Sheriff David Clark for FBI Director.

Sheriff Joe Arpaio for head of the Border Patrol or perhaps INS.

John Kasich for White House Janitor. Don't fall in Johnny! And if you do, by all means, grab that handle. That'll help ya' out! Oh yeah ... Serbia Strong!

Mitt Romney for non-entity ... Oh wait! ... He already is.

MAKE ANIME REAL! ... Providing, of course, it's not something apocalyptic like Neon Genesis Evangelion or hentai.

xxxxx

Serious consideration should be given to the Ambassadorship to Japan. While Carolyn Kennedy Schlossberg proved to be better than originally thought, a better choice would be a no nonsense ex-military man. This would send a message to all in that part of the world that the U.S. takes its relationship with Japan seriously.

Another suggestion would be the author of  THE MONSTER MOVIE FANS' GUIDE TO JAPAN, Armand Vaquer. He seems to know more about Japan than most Japanese!

Maybe he'll take the job if he can take his RV with him.

Darn kaiju flicks!

DONE!

Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. You're already there if there's other articles 'n pitchers under 'em.

Wednesday, November 9, 2016

IT'S TRUMP!



IT'S TRUMP!!!!!!!!!!!

No more need be said.

Jus' sayin' ...


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this means you're already there. Let's make America Great Again.

Sunday, October 30, 2016

Attention Christians ... VOTE TRUMP!



Attention Christians ... VOTE TRUMP!


Awhile back, I ran into a fellow believer who said he couldn't vote for Donald Trump because "he's not a man of God". In fact, he wasn't going to vote at all!

Of course I have no patience with an attitude like that and told him so. Anyone not getting involved in the political process is a drag on society and has NO right in complaining afterwards about the sad state of affairs that may come about after the wrong people take office and implement their plans to save us from ourselves.

That sad state of affairs WILL take place if too many people "sit it out" on election day and allow Hillary Clinton to become president.

There is NO excuse for not voting.

And certainly, Donald Trump is not that excuse.

Yes ...

He's rude. He's crude. He's not all that polished. He may have a past not in liking to the more genteel among us.

HE IS NOT A POLITICIAN and has little skill in soothing "itching ears".  (2nd Timothy 4:3)

What he is is a hard headed businessman with much experience. Not only in business but in his handling of politicians, unions and other "factions" over the years in order to conduct it. He knows how they think and act.

A good illustration can be seen from this contrasting scene from the comedy film, Back To School, starring Rodney Dangerfield.

He will conduct the business of the executive branch on sound business principals:

Don't spend more than what you have, make or take. Otherwise if your outgo is greater than your income, then your upkeep will be your downfall.

"Oh!" You say. "He's not a Christian! He's not a man of God!"

Not a man of God. Well ... If you've read your bible, you know God in some way has made use of the likes of womanizers, prostitutes, politicians, tax collectors and even dictators to further his kingdom on earth and protect believers. The likes of Sampson, Matthew, Nebuchanezor, King David, Rahab, Mary Magdalene come to mind. Their credentials as saints weren't exactly the greatest.

Many other Biblical figures had led less than perfect lives.

And the same goes for Donald Trump.

Even YOU are not exactly the "man of God" you'd like to be. So what makes you think it's beneath you to vote for Mr. Trump?

Even though Mr. Trump is certainly less than perfect (Just like you! Or me for that matter.), unlike his opponent, his political platform upholds many of the things you believe in (Examples are he's pro-life and pro-Christian liberties.).

Don't think of him as the "lesser of two evils". Rather he's the better of the two candidates.

That much is obvious in comparing the two platforms/agendas.

Over the years I have heard "big talk" coming from various folks in the right wing and Christian circles. Stuff like, "if they come for my guns, I'll shoot 'em!" or "my faith is strong, I'll withstand it."

Or even worse ... "I don't have to worry for I'll be taken up in the rapture."

Putting aside any debate over "the rapture", you don't know when Revelations' prophecies will start. People the world over are going through hell on earth right now for various reasons. Just try telling them they're not going through "tribulation".

History has shown all sorts of horrendous periods and places of trials and persecution over the centuries. More than likely a possible Clinton presidency would continue AND RADICALLY INTENSIFY the situation Mr. Obama and the left has already put us in and not be an ushering in of Tim LaHayes' apocalyptic fantasies.

Your vote for Donald Trump, for the moment, is something that you can do NOW to prevent what may be a socialist dark age and the radical curtailment of the practice of your Christian faith.

Forget the "big talk" and faith/rapture fantasies.

If you're a coward with your vote now ...

You'll be a coward with Jesus (And your guns.) later.

Jus' sayin' ...



Donald Trump for President here.

Republican Party here.

Ohio Republican Party here.

Citizens for Community Values here.

Where Is the Church In this Presidential election? here.

An Encounter With Evil here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this means you're already there.

Monday, October 24, 2016

Donald Trumps' 8-Point Plan for His First 100 Days In Office



Donald Trumps' 8-Point Plan for His First 100 Days In Office


As soon as I enter the White House on January 20, 2017, I will begin implementing my 8-Point Plan for the first 100 days of the Trump Administration.

Here is what we will do:

1. On Day One, we will roll out our plan to BUILD THE WALL, send criminal illegal immigrants home and finally end the open borders nightmare.

2. Begin renegotiating ALL unfair trade deals like NAFTA which have undercut American employment and exported our prosperity.

3. CANCEL all executive orders, bureaucratic rules and crippling regulations that send American jobs overseas.

4. Work with Congress to REPEAL and replace the disastrous ObamaCare legislation that is ruining American healthcare.

5. Lift the radical Obama regulations on Americas' energy industry to END our dependence on foreign energy sources and create new jobs here at home.

6. Propose, pass and sign into law a massive TAX CUT for all working Americans and unleash the jobs-creating power of our small businesses.

7. NOMINATE Surpreme Court Justices who will uphold the Constitution and not legislate the liberal agenda from the bench and ...

8. IMPOSE strict new ethics rules to restore the integrity of the Office of the Secretary of State.


Vote for Donald Trump and these plans for his First 100 Days ... Imagine what can be done with a non corrupt President who actually cares about America as opposed to hates America (Barack Obama) and Hillary Clinton who only loves herself, her donors and Power!

A vote for Donald Trump is a vote for America.

Any vote not for Trump, third party or not at all, is a vote for Clinton.




Donald Trump for President here.

Vote for Trump Anyway here.

Two Votes for Hillary here.

Can't Afford Obama, Can't Afford Clinton here.

Republican Party here.

Ohio Republican Party here.



Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this one means you're already there.

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Vote for Trump Anyway!




Vote for Trump Anyway!


So it seems Mr. Trump might be a scoundrel ... Very well.

For the sake of argument, let us assume the allegations are true.

As it is it may seem even harder for some to vote for him.

Some may ask how one could vote for such a person.

Actually the choice is still very simple and easy.

One thing the Left has taught me over the years is that no matter how execrable any of their office holders or candidates are, the Left will defend and vote for them. If they want their people in charge and forward their agenda, the Left will support them no mattter what.

For the Left, ideology is more important than personality.

We must follow the lefts' example and vote for Mr. Trump to win this election.

So ... Assuming that the allegations of sexual misconduct of 20+ years ago are true ...

On one side we have a pig, Mr. Trump.

On the other, we have another pigs' very corrupt, socialist enabler, Hillary Clinton.

Since the pigs' platform is more in line with our political beliefs, I will vote for the pig.

Simple enough, works for me.

Remember ... With the Left and the Democrats, ideology TRUMPS personality.

We must do the same.

Much is at stake in this election.

So much so that if Clinton is elected it could mean the end of this country, not only in its' present form but maybe not in any form at all.

That is to say:

The message to the rest of the Third World already is that the United States is a great place to be poor in, everyone is welcome and American working folks will be more than happy (!?) to foot the bill.

The Third World, urged on by our politicians and their allies in the media, is already flooding in. If elected, Clinton will continue the Obama policies of non-enforcement of our immigration laws and the flood will soon become a torrent.

On top of that, without any means of vetting, Clinton will allow in a hoard of Muslims, many of whom are affiliated with terrorist groups.

Within ten to fifteen years, this country will look, sound and SMELL like the Third World because it will be part of the Third World.

Then there is our federal judicial system which is already heavily seeded with creatures like Obama and Clinton. Judges who look upon our Constitution as only so many suggestions at best or as outmoded and to be disregarded.

These judges on the left look upon words as sliding scale non-concepts that can mean anything, thus the Constitution can be made to say anything to fit the situation or their agenda of the moment.

Until recently a conservative leaning Supreme Court has been the last legal line of defense of our individual rights as guaranteed by the Constitution. Right now it is evenly divided with a vacant seat to be filled by the next President and a rubber stamp Congress.

If  Hillary Clinton is elected, she and that rubber stamp Congress (Republican or Democrat.) will appoint a creature like themselves to that vacant Supreme Court post.

It will then be only a short matter of time that you can kiss your rights goodbye.

Your rights to speak out, express yourself in voice, print and belief. Access to information. The means of self defense and to worship. The right to be involved in the political process. These will eventually be sharply reduced.

The only right you will eventually have will be the "right" to obey whatever new laws they deem necessary or go to jail.

We will not have a rule of laws let alone of men, but a rule of chaos.

One has to be pragmatic, and throw aside ones' feelings about the personal life of Donald Trump. The consequences of a Clinton presidency far out-weigh Mr. Trumps' ALLEGED past heavy handed indiscretions.

Face it, if Hillary Clinton was any worse than she is now (And she could be.) the Left and most Democrats would STILL vote for her. We must do the same for Mr. Trump.

Too much of the above is riding on it.



Donald Trump for President here.

Republican Party here.

Ohio Republican Party here.

Ex-Army blog (Where I got the above illustration.) here.

Two Votes for Hillary here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.

Friday, October 14, 2016

Two Votes For Hillary



Two Votes For Hillary


To those who will vote third party or not at all.

A vote for third party or not at all is actually TWO votes for Hillary.

You will have cancelled out your own vote.

That's one vote for Hillary.

You will have NOT cancelled out someone elses' vote for Hillary.

That's two votes for Hillary.

GET OUT AND VOTE FOR DONALD TRUMP on election day.

Remember ...

A VOTE FOR A THIRD PARTY CANDIDATE OR NOT AT ALL IS TWO VOTES FOR HILLARY.

A little reminder ...

Donald Trump for President here.

Republican Party here.

Ohio Republican Party here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this means you're already there.

Monday, October 10, 2016

Can't Afford Obama, Can't Afford Clinton



Can't Afford Obama, Can't Afford Clinton


Well ... I guess I'm now expected to hypocritically wring my hands over things someone said ELEVEN YEARS AGO IN A PRIVATE CONVERSATION. The kind of things I myself say when women aren't around. I don't think so.

I'm also known to tell guys to "tone it down" when ladies are about.

And that's the point. No women were around when Mr. Trump said those things. He's a lot more polite than you think.

I could say Mr. Trump was a Democrat when he said those things but that would be ridiculous. The truth is that all men are pigs and should constantly be apologizing to the ends of their days and beyond ... NOT.

Meanwhile a slew of GOP beta males have withdrawn their support of Mr. Trump.

Among whom are:

Rep. Paul Ryan - Cuck, cuck, cuck, cuck, cuck-servative.

Gov. John Kasich - I haven't voted for you since your betrayal of gun owners in back in '92 over the "assault weapon" ban.

Sen. Rob Portman - You DO want to win this election ... Don't you? Maybe not ...

Sen. Kelly Ayotte - Yeah she's not a guy but beta in every other way. While you're writing in Mike Pence as a vote instead of hitting the button/lever for Mr. Trump, that in no way goes out as a vote against Clinton ... And Hillary thanks you from the bottom of her heart. Providing of course she has one ... Or you for that matter.

xxxxx

I would however caution those who support Mr. Trump that you NOT with-hold your vote from Republican congressional candidates who have stopped supporting him. Do you really want the little socialist horrors running against them to be in office?

A bunch of wishy washy Republicans in Congress are far better than pimping Democrats.

Yeah, I know, not by much but hey ... You gotta' work with what you get and you REALLY don't want to get Democrats. I know I don't!

xxxxx

While there are political reasons I'm hitting the button for Mr. Trump, I also have personal ones:

I had a new career just starting in 2009. I had to hang that dream up, one of the reasons being the worsening economy. Yeah, Bush the Second may have started that but his successor doubled/tripled down on it. Thank you Obama and friends.

My (Now mandatory.) health insurance increased fifty dollars a month. That's 600 dollars a year. I downgraded to the Bronze plan that now costs more than what the Silver plan did at the old price.

My IRA is about ten grand less than what it should be. It took a 3000 dollar hit from last year alone.

The yearly interest on my bank account isn't enough to buy a Happy Meal.

Can't afford Obama.

Can't afford Clinton.

VOTE TRUMP!



Donald Trump for President here.

Republican Party website here.

Ohio Republican Party website here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this one means you're already there.

Wednesday, October 5, 2016

Problems Problems




Problems Problems

Seems Blogger has been having problems with link and blog lists disappearing from client blogs.

Including mine.

Will try to remedy this situation this weekend.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this 'un means yer already there.

Thursday, September 29, 2016

The "Princess" and the Pee: An Angel Beats Anime Fan Fiction Story



Yui makes use of the "facilities" one time too many ... A riff off a scene from Episode 6: Family Affair.


The "Princess" and the Pee: An Angel Beats Anime Fan Fiction Story

by

C V Ford

xxxxx

"YO! ... SENSEI! ... I GOTTA' PEEEEE!"

"Sighhhh! ... Oh, man!"

Leaning back in his desk chair, the young blue haired man gazed exasperatingly up at the light ballasts and ceiling fixtures. Class not even fifteen minutes in and it was ... what ... the fifth? ... sixth? ... time she LOUDLY(!) announced to teacher, class ... the whole freakin' world ... her intentions to use the facilities ...

And in such a crass, vulgar manner!

"You again? ... Very well," the teacher also seemingly resigned to it, "... go ahead."

"Man! If only the teachers were this easy when we were alive," thought Hinata.
"Things sure would have been a lot less complicated."

A light whack on the shoulder had the young man shift his vision rightward to that of a diminutive, pink tressed "goth goblin" leering a toothy grin downward as she passed.

"Really hafta' go this time," conspiratorial look in her eyes. "Gonna' use the teachers' unisex single down the hall."

Hideki watched her saunter out.

On Yuris' orders, members of the Battlefront were to attend classes. Partly to avoid another mass contemplation room confinement but also to create disturbances in order to see how far Ayoto Naoi, the Acting Student Council President and his "zombies" could be pushed before retaliation. The infractions would also keep them from getting too "into" their classes and possible "obliteration" ... which was probably what the little dictator wanted.

The methods varied:

Hisako, TK, Fujimaki and Matsushita were busy "infracting" in a hot Mahjong session at the center of first row.

Two rows over, a VERY self conscious Oyama nervously contemplating a try at sneaking something to crunch on from a party size bag of chips.

Takamatsu in hard calisthenics an aisle over.

Noda, the formidable moron, lay across two desks in an attempt at snooze, impairing the ability of two other students in their work thus in violation of Yuris' instructions not to impede others.

An obvious though quiet distraction being "staged" by Shiina in the back corner of the window row, balancing scissors, ruler and a broom on the fingertips of one hand in vigorous focus training.

As for the hyperactive dingbat Yui, her non-method seemed to be continually requesting bathroom breaks, leaving for a short interval then return ... to repeat the "process" over and over ad nauseum.

Hinatas' own "nauseum" was really getting to him.

A sideways glance to his buddy seated in the desk behind, he asked, "Just what does that little ... dipwad ... think she's doing? You'd think she'd try something else ... And why the teachers restroom this time around?"

"Act of defiance maybe?" Otonashi in answer

"And she didn't have to tell me she actually HAD to go this time."

"She likes you."

"Say WHAT!?" The blue hair turned full around toward the carrot top.

"Oh, come on," Otonashi urged. "She's always had a thing for you. She-"

"She brings me nothing but grief! Ever since the ball game she's been a total pain in the a-"

"You just don't know a good thing when you see it," explained Yuzuru, "I mean ... She's pretty cute, y'know?"

"Otonashi ... You are one SICK dude!"

xxxxx

"Hmmm ... I've seen that Naoi guy use the teachers loo before," Yui in thought traveling down the hallway past the student restrooms. "Probly' thinks he's privileged 'r somthin' just 'cause he's the new Council head."

In fact she'd seen the creepy one and an NPC enter it two "trips" ago.

"They gotta' be outta' there by now. If he can ... I can! Class warfare it is!"

Cautiously, Yui softly knocked below the plainly marked "Faculty/Staff Only" sign. No response, she quietly opened the now unlocked door. Peering in revealed the space devoid of anyone.

"Huh? ... What's this?" On entry, puzzlement on espying the object recessed in the wall.

"Oh yeah!" Realization lighting a weak filament 40 watt inside her pink and twin tail strapped cranium.

"Guys ... Standing up ... right!"

Fascinated, the girl fixated on the wall urinal while backing up to the throne.

Reaching under the pleated blue uniform skirt she slid her unmentionables down and proceeded to sit.

"HOLYSONOFAWHATTHE- ... AAAAAAA-!!"

XXXXX

"... so you see Otonashi," explained the blue hair, "there's NO WAY I could ever feel any attraction to that little whack-job, why she's-"

"-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

The more than audible scream could be clearly heard by one and all on the building floor.

"It's Yui!" A more than concerned looking Hinata exclaimed, launching out of the desk chair and toward the door to the hall. "That damn Naoi, if he's-"

"Yup!" Hinata thought watching his friend rush past to the demented ones' rescue. "No attraction at all ... RIGHT!"

Also launching up, Otonashi shouted a hasty "excuse us" to the "teacherbot" as he ran to assist.

Hideki was already halfway down the hall when the red head got out the door.

"Yeah it's obvious," he wryly sarcasted to himself. "No feelings for the little whack-job ... PERIOD!

"Speaking of which ..."

The aforementioned little whack-job fast-walked out a well ajar unisex door and past a now confused and adrenaline hyped Hinata.

"Wh- ... What's wrong? You OK? You're not hurt or anything, are you?" Almost pleading. "If that Naoi did anything to you, I'll- !"

"It's NOTHING!"

"Don't tell me that, what's-"

"NOOOOTHING!"

The royally aggravated one stalked on back to the classroom, fists clenched, shoulders hunched, face in hellish grimace and in no uncertain terms not wanting to discuss an-y-thing.

Passing a puzzled ginger who noted the back third of her skirt was sopping wet, she pivoted into the classroom.  Returning to her seat at the front window desk, arms crossed, she sat herself down ... hard. The act of which with an extremely audible squish.

"Hmmmph! Hnnnngh!"

Turning his gaze back down the hall, Yuzuru saw a fast approaching and laughing(?) Hinata returning from having had a look inside the small restroom.

Holding his sides and trying not to be too loud in his gasping and wheezing (And utterly failing!), Hinata staggered past and in. Otonashi following.

"A-heep! ... Durrrp! ... Gak! ... Oh God!"

"What ha-"

" ... eeeeeh! .... Seat!"

"Huh?"

" ... Seat! ... " Hinata coughing/gagging and weakly collapsing into his desk chair. "Someone left the freakin' seat UP! ... Aww ... BWA! HA! HA! HA! HAA! HAAAAAAAA!"

"SHUT UP YOU!" From the front window corner of the room.

"So Yui," a smiling Hisako looking up from her game tiles, "you fall in or something?"

Matsushita hung onto the game desk, heaving silently in laughter, rattling the tiles.

"Good thing you didn't grab the handle in getting yourself out," Fujimaki in accompaniment. "Then you'd be dizzy as well as wet!"

"Swir-leee!!" TK

Oyama looked on in amused bewilderment.

The reclining Noda, on his part, grinning with one eye open surveying the unfortunate one.

Takamatsu, in the middle of a "cruncher", froze in wonderment.

Shiina, having set her balancing objects aside, turned her back on the scene, concealing her own mirthful response. Being from another era, she recalled her own early encounters with Sir John Haringtons' invention (1) after arriving at this school in the In-Between.

"Aw c'mon, guys," Otonashi returning to his desk, "she's been through enough, she-"

"CAN IT! ... ALLA' YAS!" Again from the front window corner.

"Please keep it down a little." The 'robo-teach' commanded. "We are having class here."

Recalling Yuris' instructions, the extremely amused Battlefronters suppressed their din though subdued giggles and laughter from various parts of the room still evident.

The class session continued and for the next ten minutes, with front members engaging in their diverse infractions, a relative peace prevailed until from the front window corner-

"YO! ... SENSEI! ... I GOTTA' PEEEEE!"

From the back, a lamenting Shiina.

"This is soooo ... "

END

xxxxx

Storyline (only) copyright  © 9-29-16 C V Ford


1. Sir John Harington (1560 - 1612) Inventor of the flush toilet.


Go to C V Fords' Anime Fan Fiction Page here.

Go to C V Fords' profile page and list of anime fan fiction stories at Fan Fiction dot net here.

Go to Fan Fiction dot net here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles below this one means you're already there. Don't grab the handle on your way out!

Disclaimer: The preceding is a NON-PROFIT work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only. I make no claim to ownership of any of the COPYRIGHTED names/characters, places, and events mentioned in this work. They are the sole properties of their respective owners. Please, by all means support the owners of such properties in the purchase and enjoyment of the original works.

Sunday, September 25, 2016

Sen. Ted Cruz Endorses Donald Trump

... AND AGAIN!


Got this from Armand Vaquers' blog Armands' Rancho del Cielo:


Sen. Ted Cruz Endorses Donald Trump


Here is Sen. Ted Cruz's (R-TX) statement endorsing Donald Trump for president:

This election is unlike any other in our nation’s history. Like many other voters, I have struggled to determine the right course of action in this general election.

In Cleveland, I urged voters, “please, don’t stay home in November. Stand, and speak, and vote your conscience, vote for candidates up and down the ticket whom you trust to defend our freedom and to be faithful to the Constitution.”

After many months of careful consideration, of prayer and searching my own conscience, I have decided that on Election Day, I will vote for the Republican nominee, Donald Trump.

I’ve made this decision for two reasons. First, last year, I promised to support the Republican nominee. And I intend to keep my word.

Second, even though I have had areas of significant disagreement with our nominee, by any measure Hillary Clinton is wholly unacceptable — that’s why I have always been #NeverHillary.

Six key policy differences inform my decision. First, and most important, the Supreme Court. For anyone concerned about the Bill of Rights — free speech, religious liberty, the Second Amendment — the Court hangs in the balance. I have spent my professional career fighting before the Court to defend the Constitution. We are only one justice away from losing our most basic rights, and the next president will appoint as many as four new justices. We know, without a doubt, that every Clinton appointee would be a left-wing ideologue. Trump, in contrast, has promised to appoint justices “in the mold of Scalia.”

For some time, I have been seeking greater specificity on this issue, and today the Trump campaign provided that, releasing a very strong list of potential Supreme Court nominees — including Sen. Mike Lee, who would make an extraordinary justice — and making an explicit commitment to nominate only from that list. This commitment matters, and it provides a serious reason for voters to choose to support Trump.

Second, Obamacare. The failed healthcare law is hurting millions of Americans. If Republicans hold Congress, leadership has committed to passing legislation repealing Obamacare. Clinton, we know beyond a shadow of doubt, would veto that legislation. Trump has said he would sign it.

Third, energy. Clinton would continue the Obama administration’s war on coal and relentless efforts to crush the oil and gas industry. Trump has said he will reduce regulations and allow the blossoming American energy renaissance to create millions of new high-paying jobs.

Fourth, immigration. Clinton would continue and even expand President Obama’s lawless executive amnesty. Trump has promised that he would revoke those illegal executive orders.

Fifth, national security. Clinton would continue the Obama administration’s willful blindness to radical Islamic terrorism. She would continue importing Middle Eastern refugees whom the FBI cannot vet to make sure they are not terrorists. Trump has promised to stop the deluge of unvetted refugees.

Sixth, Internet freedom. Clinton supports Obama’s plan to hand over control of the Internet to an international community of stakeholders, including Russia, China, and Iran. Just this week, Trump came out strongly against that plan, and in support of free speech online.

These are six vital issues where the candidates’ positions present a clear choice for the American people.

If Clinton wins, we know — with 100% certainty — that she would deliver on her left-wing promises, with devastating results for our country.

My conscience tells me I must do whatever I can to stop that.

We also have seen, over the past few weeks and months, a Trump campaign focusing more and more on freedom — including emphasizing school choice and the power of economic growth to lift African-Americans and Hispanics to prosperity.

Finally, after eight years of a lawless Obama administration, targeting and persecuting those disfavored by the administration, fidelity to the rule of law has never been more important.

The Supreme Court will be critical in preserving the rule of law. And, if the next administration fails to honor the Constitution and Bill of Rights, then I hope that Republicans and Democrats will stand united in protecting our fundamental liberties.

Our country is in crisis. Hillary Clinton is manifestly unfit to be president, and her policies would harm millions of Americans. And Donald Trump is the only thing standing in her way.

A year ago, I pledged to endorse the Republican nominee, and I am honoring that commitment. And if you don’t want to see a Hillary Clinton presidency, I encourage you to vote for him.


Donald Trump for President here.

Republican Party website here.

Armands' Rancho del Cielo blog main page here. Godzilla fan and unofficial ambassador to Japan. After all, someone has to make up for Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg!


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here. Any articles under this means you're already there. GET OUT AND VOTE!

Friday, September 23, 2016

The Porntrolling of Haruhi Suzumiya: Chapter Four of a The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction Story

Artwork: Haruhisky, Re-colorisation: Alfonso Ling.


The Porn Trolling of Haruhi Suzumiya: Chapter Four of a The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya Fan Fiction Story

by

C V Ford

xxxxx

Chapter 4: The Fan Gets Hit By the Plan

A further month later, at a metro library branch, Carl accessed the bogus SixSick6 account.

Though things were improving even further in regards to anime and the public, other events were proving it was time to end it all.

A story in the papers and a spot on Fox News a few hours before, had him apprehensive and scrambling to cover any and all possible tracks to him.

It was revealed the FBI, at the behest of the State and Justice departments, had been looking into the possibility of conducting an ongoing investigation into the storys' posting and the resultant diplomatic chaos. Anything disrupting the relations between the U.S. and Japan was deemed possible espionage.

Remarkably enough, Otaku Fiction dot net still resisting in the name of free speech and the First Amendment and holding things up in the courts.

He decided not to blow this off. Recollections of a Yoo Tube poster being wrongfully blamed for the Benghazi debacle by the Hildebeast and jailed for almost a year (1), prompted him to take action.

At a library branch one county and several towns over, Carl parked some blocks away and walked a roundabout route.

He knew there was no way he could be traced. After all, he didn't post the story in his "rogue" Otaku Fiction dot net account from home and always made sure to access it in another town, usually another county. All they could narrow it down to was a very large part of central Ohio.

Getting on Otaku Fiction dot net, he noted the blurb at the top of the news section of the sites' main page:

"Due to demand, Otaku Fiction dot net now accepts stories of a more explicit MA rated content. In order to ensure only mature readers can access said content, an extra password and username is now required for sections containing such content. Please consult instructions in the Rules and Guidelines section to set up/select special password to accompany username."

He noted the aIRtight story to be missing from the old M rated section but still a sole entry on his SixSick6 account thus in the new MA section.

On top of all the other things he hadn't foreseen, this was really offputting. All he wanted was to troll a joke, have some fun and mess with some minds. But inadvertently promoting porn?

"Have I created a monster?"

Sighing to himself, Carl proceeded. It was time to end what little he could and make as clean a break of it as possible.

Going to the Publish section of the account he proceeded to Document Manager.

Accessing the doc he hit the Remove button killing that. Then going to Manage Stories he hit Delete Story.

"And so it ends-," sighed Carl ... being cut off in mid-sigh.

The Private Messaging field had a numeral 1.

"Wait a sec! How could-"

Quickly checking his settings, he noted ALL of them still set on "no", including
"Accept Private Messaging".

Going back, the numeral still there.

Hesitantly he clicked on the field then going to Inbox. The sole entry. A Haruhi in red bunny suit avatar and ... HS.

Clicking on it revealed:

"You don't think you're getting off THAT easy, do you?" HS

"HS?"

For all Carl knew at that moment HS stood for Holy S--t!

He concluded that either the feds were trying to flush him out or possibly a hacker with some skills had managed to break through and leave that message.

As it was, he congratulated himself on the precautions he had taken and was confident it would get no further than this.

Closing out the account, Carl signed out as SixSick6 for the last time.

Goodbye aIRtight ... Foreverrrrr ... !

xxxxx

Getting home later that day found Carl settling in to a net surfing session.

Nothing like an easy, relaxing cruise of social media to take his mind off his concerns ... Yeah ... RIGHT!

He mentally reviewed his precautions. Different "pen name", separate account, accessed ONLY in locations away from home. The PM that reached him had to be some hacker or feddy getting through and on the bogus account only. There was no way-

In accessing his "legit" Otaku Fiction dot net account, he noted he had a numeral 1 in Personal Messaging.

"Probably that Ling jerk," he thought.

Bringing the section up more than brought him up short ... More like hitting a mental brick wall.

"Hi! Just to let ya' know. My friends and I are gonna' pay ya' a little visit. See ya' in a bit!" HS

With the same Haruhi red bunny suit avatar!

"No! ... NO WAY! ... Imp-"

Grabbing the phone, a nervously sweating Carl was about to 911 then hit the brakes and thumbed the receiver in thought.

"This is nuts! What do I tell the police? FCC maybe? That I'm being harassed ... By the feds ... a hacker ... or a ... a cartoon character!? I'd have to tell 'em the whole story, I'd ... It would get out ... I'd be telling the whole world I'm the one who's been inadvertently trolling U.S. and Japanese foreign relations for over a month. There's got to be a-"

Phone ringing in his hand, Carl jumped a foot off his chair.

Keeping his thumb down he decided to screen the call and let the answering machine do the talking.

"Heyyy ... C'mon big boy," in response to the prompt. "I know you're there. Surely you got the guts to pick up your own phone."

In the space of the instant he put the receiver to his ear he realized the voice sounded like that of ------ ---, the English voice actress of-!

"Uh ... Hello?"

"Hiya Carl! Guess who? ... As if you didn't know. We're just outside an' on our way up!"

"Who ... Who is this!?" Carl dreading the impossible about to happen.

"We'll be right up!"

"Wait you-"

click

Leaning over Carl pulled open a desk drawer and lifted out the 4" barrel, stainless steel Smith & Wesson model 65. (2) The .357 revolvers' weight felt reassuring. He had no illusions about taking on the FBI or any other government entity but a nut job (With phenomenal hacking skills at that!) imitating an anime character was another matter entirely.

His reassurance was short lived. The sound of his apartment buildings' main downstairs door opening in accompaniment with several female voices in fluent Japanese came up to him loud and clear.

Carl kept the panic down in spite of the fact of his recognition of the voices.

Though not usually one to watch shows in their original Japanese dubs (Old white guy who speaks English.) the Haruhi series was one of the few he did with both that and mother tongue.

"Can't be the feds ... the Japs wouldn't send seiyus to investigate something like this ... Kyoani? ... No! ...

"GET IT TOGETHER CARL!"

Reaching again into the desk drawer, he drew out the revolvers' double speed loader pouch. Twelve extra shots of .357 topped with 158 grain semi-jacketed hollow point slugs could be a healthy addition to any social situation.

Responding to the knock on the door (And wishing there was more time to fetch the 12 gauge.), Carl softly sidled up to the door. Keeping to the side, he swept a hand over the peep lense. No shots or anyone trying to bust through, he cautiously gazed through the peep lense.

Only to see an eye staring right back.

Royally startled, he jumped back several feet.

After composing himself and dredging up some courage in a surprisingly half moment, Carl again chanced a second look through the lens.

It was as he disbelievingly feared. The five real life figures of the main female cast members of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya stood waiting in the hall with objects in hand. North High uniforms and all!

Slowly backing away from the door and to the side, the man put himself in a "fighting" stance with the revolver in a two handed 'Ayoob' grip (3) half way up to sighting level.

"Hey Carl! It's us!" The familiar voice of ------ --- coming through. "C'mon little piggy, open up. I know you don't want us to do the ol' huff 'n puff routine, right?"

"Huff 'n puff, huh?" Muttering to himself. Nothing like anger to drum up courage, Carl tightened his grip on the revolver. "I'll show ya' huff 'n puff!"

Then making with his warning.

"Take off, you ... Or I'm callin' the police!"

"Oh," sing songy response, "I don't think sooooo ... I mean, you're one of our biggest fans!"

"Was," Carl thought as they called his bluff.

A slight weight shift of the revolver in Carls' hands had him do a quick glance at the gun. In shocked disbelief, he clicked the latch, swinging out the cylinder.

"Im-impossible!"

"You lookin' for these?" From behind, accompanied by the sound of rattling cartridges in hand.

In further shock, Carl spun about, his eyes being greeted with the sight of the five cast characters in various states of recline and rest on and about his living room furniture. Title character and three holding kendo bamboo practice swords and Mikuru ... a rope.

"NO WAY! You-"

"Waaaaayyyy ... Unlike my TV persona I know what I'm fully capable of." The ominous 'blue bird' set the lethal rounds clattering on the living room table next to the speed loader pouch.

The man made a grab for the door.

"There's no escape, we'll just be back on the other side of the door." Ryoko chiming in.

His hand hit empty wall in the try for a knob to a door that now wasn't there in his futile effort in making a swift exit.

"Or that," the blue haired one smiled.

"Besides," the tall green tressed giggler putting in, "we got business to uh ... discuss."

The ginger with the rope looked on wide eyed.

"Yes ... business," the deadpan gray haired stoic adding.

"A- ... And that would be?" Carl questioned, tightening his grip on the handgun. It would still make do for a small club.

"Y'know ... " Goddess Whack Job rose from the easy chair and began, now in full control, "I've seen a LOT of doujinshi, art and crackfic having to do with me and my friends over the past few years ... Some good ... some not so good ... and yeah ...some really great. Then ..."

Haruhi held the practice sword down and across her thighs, leaning forward with upraised right eyebrow.

"Then there are some that ... well ... Really push the limits to what even we have trouble taking in."

"Like some of the ones by that one guy," Tsuraya put in. "Uh ... What's his name?"

"Alfonso Ling." Yuki

"Yeah," acknowledged Haruhi, "THAT guy!

"But that one story you did ... ," the brigade leader continued. "It really crossed the line. Shoot! ... It flew right over it at mach ten!

"I mean ... REALLY ... Poor Mikuru-chan's beside herself being depicted like that! That bit about her doing all that-"

"Actually Miss Suzumiya, I liked the part where I-"

"QUIET YOU!"

"Eeep!"

"It's all she could do to keep from crying the past several weeks!"

Carl stole a quick glance at the petite, well endowed one in the barcalounger returning a confused shrug and embarrassed smile his way. He could see "Poor Mikuru-chan" was all cried out ... NOT!

"You know, it's bad enough when a show gets cancelled. With most live actors, they're out of work until a new gig comes along sooner or later and things are OK again. But with us anime characters ... One usually ends up in the toilet of HENTAI HELL!"

"Say WHAT!?"

"You heard me Carl ... Most anime/manga is one or two seasons and then we're out on our posteriors wondering what to do with ourselves. If your show is well remembered and your character design is 'interesting' in some way ... and you have no place to go ... You end up having to make a living doing something ... else."

!?

"Yeah! Look what happened to the Sailor Moon girls!" Ryoko exclaimed in interruption.

"I was getting to that," the brigade leader continued. "It's been ... what? ... Yeah! ... over twenty years ... TWENTY FREAKIN' YEARS ... since their show left the air. It long went past the point where their show was forgotten and it ended up with everyone thinking that porn was all they ever did. Thanks to a real gig like Crystal they're taking some time off from porn for awhile."

"Wait a sec," Carl in disbelief. "You mean to say you have to resort to porn just to keep going?"

"Not all of us. Some of us are so generic looking the expedient of changing hair colors and styles or just our personas and other parts come along. Others end hooking up or marrying their agents, artists or character designers.

"Some," Haruhi did a sideways glance over at Mikuru, "even wind up marrying a rich otaku."

"Hold on a moment," Carls' mind still trying to take in and adjust to this 'Roger Rabbit' moment. (4) "There's plenty of art and manga porn of you and your show out there-"

"And fanfic." Yukis' eyes narrowing oh so slightly.

"- and you weren't uh- ... involved ... in any of it?"

"Like I said ... Some of us 'toons, as you call us, only need to restyle their hair and personalities and they can be anyone. A LOT of characters looking for work y'know." Explained Suzumiya. "Though admittedly, I have done ... SOME modeling for that Haruhisky guy but it was only some ecchi/cheese cakey stuff mind you." (5)

A glance about, noting the eye rolling on the other four faces told Carl she may have been involved in other (A LOT of!) "independent" projects.

"It's a good thing Yuki, Ryoko and I can bend reality somewhat or we all would have been under the pen 'n ink of all those doujin sickos-"

"And fanfic writers." Yuki

"-So none," the brigade dictator  declared, "and I mean ... NONE ... of us ever had to do anything X-rated."

A stifled cough/giggle from a smirking Tsuraya had the man doing another quick scan revealing a blushing Mikuru, a half grinning Ryoko gazing at the ceiling, and a knowing look on Yukis' face (It's ALWAYS the quiet ones!).

"Just because they didn't have to doesn't mean they didn't," thought Carl. "THIS Haruhi may know her capabilities but she's still just as clueless and oblivious about other things."

The man nervously eyed the kendo sticks then back at Haruhi, interrupting her spiel.

"So you uh ... gonna' ... kill me?" Trying to keep up a front of bravado.

The SOS fuhrer returned an evil smile chilling Carls' blood.

"Kill you? Oh nooooo! Why we- ... Eh ... Put the Rambo blade away Ryoko."

"Awwww!" The deadly ingenue frowned pocketing the knife.

Carls' eyes widened.

"No ... Not kill you. You did, after all, give anime a worldwide boost in general and our show in particular what with it getting continued and all. We actually owe you one."

Carl let out half a relieved breath.

"Which is why we're only going to chastise you for your story." Blood chilling grin more intense.

The man abruptly retrieved the breath.

"Chastise ... as in?" The man again noted the rope coil in the nervous gingers' hands.

"Herbs and spices." Yuki

Carl aghast. He knew Miss Deadpan wasn't talking KFC. (6)

"And it works the same way with pain AS well as pleasure!" A gleeful Tsuraya exclaimed resting a chin on her bestest buds' shoulder. "Right Mikuru?"

"Uh ... eh ... Heh!" More evident embarrassment from the carrot top.

"You'll also note how long the handles are on these kendo sticks," added Haruhi, her teeth showing.

"Y'know Haruhi," Ryoko suggesting getting the be-ribboned ones' attention. "We might later wanna' try the treated rope out on the guy who thought it up."

"Hey! Not a bad idea Ryoko! He pretty much deserves it."

The malevolent 'toon goddess turned back to Carl, her grin wider. "Only unlike you ... He'll be screaming for more ... Like a little girl! (7)

"And with that!"

Shouldering the kendo stick, the demi-dietys' swiftly extended arm ending with index, shot out toward Carl.

"PENALTY!"

END

Storyline (only) copyright © 9-15-2016 C V Ford

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1. The poor guy has been ruined and as of this writing is living in a homeless shelter.

2. Calling all "grammar nazis": Before any of you fly off the handle about me using an ampersand in Smith & Wesson, keep in mind that's how you "spell" Smith & Wesson.

Don't believe me? Look up the logo on Google Images.

3. A modification of the standard two handed grip but with the supporting hands' index finger snugged under the trigger guard. Resulting in a steadier/stable grip. Pioneered by author/writer Massad Ayoob. It works!

4. Who Framed Roger Rabbit (Buena Vista Pictures Distribution Corp., 1988) - A combination live action/animated fantasy wherein a 1940s era private detective (Bob Hoskins) investigates a murder at the behest of the title character in order to prove his innocence. A hilarious movie featuring many American cartoon characters from different studios.

5. Haruhisky is an actual hentai artist. The psuedonym pretty much says what his (Her? It?) main subject is.

6. IT'S FINGER LICKIN' GOOOOOD!

7. Yeah ... That Alfonso Ling guy again. As for the treated "rope trick", check out his story, Figure Eight on Fan Fiction.net.

Geez! I can't believe I'm boosting porn!

xxxxx

The original Haruhisky artwork.


The Porntrolling of Haruhi Suzumiya chapters: 1, 2, and 3.

Go to C V Fords' Anime Fan Fiction Page! here.

Go to C V Fords' profile page and anime fan fiction stories list on Fan Fiction dot net here.

Go to Alfonso Lings' profile page and anime fan fiction stories list on Fan Fiction dot net here. Warning: HE DOES PORN!

And his Haruhi obsession has me wondering about him. Glad I'm not like that. :)

Go to Fan Fiction dot net here.


Go to Jays' Tee Vee blog main page here.


Disclaimer: The preceding is a NON-PROFIT work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only. I make no claim to ownership of the copyrighted names/characters, places, and events mentioned in this work. They are the sole properties of  their respective owners. Please, by all means support the owners of such properties in the purchase and enjoyment of their works.